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Talk:Sauron/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: BennyOnTheLoose (talk · contribs) 19:53, 2 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]


GA review
(see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references):
    b (citations to reliable sources):
    c (OR):
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):
    b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

Overall:
Pass/Fail:

· · ·

Fictional history

[edit]
  • wikilink "Vala", "Quenya"
Done.
  • "breaking the cosmic Music with discord" - could do with a bit of explanation.
Glossed.
  • "which Sauron followed" - followed chronologically, or in the sense of "acted according to"?
"continued".
  • "Downfall" isn't a word used in the previous section consider renaming that section "Downfall of Númenor" or decapitalising it in the text.
Fixed.
  • "Gollum's friend.." should this be "Sméagol's friend.."? I don't think he was called Gollum at that time. If this is changed, then there should be a mention that he was later known as Gollum, as that name occurs a few times in the article.
Quite right. Done.

Appearance

[edit]
  • Suggest adding a word or to to introduce Gorlim.
Glossed.
  • "who has daunting eyes" - I think should be "who had daunting eyes"
Done.
  • "This raises the question of whether an "Eye" was Sauron's actual manifestation," - is that within "The Black Gate is Closed"?
No it's Christopher Tolkien. Repeated ref for clarity.

Concept and creation

[edit]
  • "probably of the Eldar elves" is missing a citation. (Unless already supported by the Auden source.)
Removed.
  • "Other critics came closer to the mark;" - only one is mentioned, either reword or mention another. (Unless already supported by the Auden source.)
Reworded.
  • "1967" - publication was June 1968, but the conjecture may well be from 1967. Just noting this in case there is a typo in a year.
Fixed.

Interpretations

[edit]
  • Looks fine.
Noted.

Adaptations

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  • "portrayed as a humanoid creature ... in Ralph Bakshi's 1978 animated version" needs a source.
Fixed.
  • I had my doubts about cedmagic as a source but after looking at the author page, I think it's acceptable.
Noted.
  • The Telegraph source doesn't support all the titles listed for video games.
Added ref.

In culture

[edit]
  • Looks fine.
Noted.

Infobox and Lead

[edit]
  • Both look fine.
Noted.

Images

[edit]
  • No issues.
Noted.

Copyvio and plagiarism check

[edit]
  • Checked all matches above 4% on Earwig's Copyvio Detector. No concerns.
Noted.

Happy to discuss, or be challenged on, any of my review comments. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:53, 2 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for all your work on the article Chiswick Chap. I find the article to be comprehensive, balanced, well-structured and well-written. I've listed some points for consideration above. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 21:20, 2 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Many thanks! Chiswick Chap (talk) 07:57, 3 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for your responses, Chiswick Chap. I'm happy to pass the article for GA. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 20:51, 3 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
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