For the first time in a long time this week, Untucked’s mantra was true: If you’re not watching that show, you’re only getting half the story. And the story that I need absolutely all of is the story of Joella’s supreme delusions. Seriously, how long has it been since we’ve gotten a queen who is this unaware of how she’s going to appear on camera, this audacious, and this imminently memeable. Rarely in recent seasons has a girl said something that made my jaw fully drop. Joella does that multiple times in this episode, culminating in her saying something so cruel to another contestant who is clearly hurting that I cannot stop thinking about it. This bitch held Lucky Starzz’s hands, looked into her tear-worn eyes, and said: “I’m gonna be honest with you, I feel confident in the fact that I’m gonna be here next week.” Gag! That’s a crazy thing to say! She’s insane. And here’s the thing … I love her.
And this episode (or really two, since Untucked earned this week a full star, maybe two in my rating) is really just a road leading us directly to that moment. Sure, some other stuff happens, and I’ll get to all of that. But sometimes, the best episodes of Drag Race are the ones that create breadcrumb trails for the audience to something iconic. It’s basic storytelling, but Drag Race is better than just about any competition at doing it. That’s why the show is so good — it tells legible stories that lead to moments. And this week, the A-plot is all about the bottom girls. For Lucky, it’s a tragedy, and for Joella, it’s a character study.
The Joella deluge begins when Lana calls her out at the beginning of the episode for being rude during Untucked about her song. This is mostly unfair: Lana herself said that she could take criticism and called herself a “big girl.” But then Hormona and Joella get into a random sparring match that I didn’t see coming but did bring to mind the phrase “mid-off.” I was entertained! Then, throughout the episode, Joella says a series of wild things, including that she “would” change her outfit since RuPaul basically told her to, but that she won’t because she literally does not have the skills to make anything else. Loved that. In Untucked, she not only says crazy things to Lucky, but she also says one of my favorite things a meh queen has ever said on this show: “I’m really scared for the girls back home to see this because in L.A. I’m literally known for my looks. I’m known to be opulent,” then, through tears, says, “And I feel like I’m not doing as well on this show as I wanted to, and it was one of my biggest fears: because I feel like so many times, someone who’s considered an icon in local drag comes on this show, and then they disappoint their community.” An icon in local drag. ICON. Wow. I have no further commentary on this other than to say that if this claim did not entertain you, then we watch Drag Race for very different reasons.
Let’s get into Lucky, Joella’s counterweight this week, for a second because I’m clearly shocked by what happened. While Joella is all unearned confidence, Lucky is a victim of her own insecurity — avoiding her own strengths and unnecessarily running straight toward her weaknesses. Last week, I had her in my predicted top four; this week, she’s out of the running. But, if I may defend myself, it turns out that she had some pretty major issues that I wasn’t expecting to be the case: Firstly, that she can’t sew, which is shocking to me, and secondly, that her head was clearly not in the game. The show spent a lot of time in the first episode of the season, and here, detailing Lucky’s home situation, not only to make us feel bad for her, but also to explain how she made a series of incredibly poor decisions this week. Despite being a remarkable artist and an interesting performer (who I’d love to see continue on this competition over some of the people still here, quite honestly), the show is telegraphing that is not a queen who was mentally ready for Drag Race and that she wasn’t able to think straight. It’s unfortunate to see a queen that is clearly in the top half of the queens here go home first, but the tragedy is that she gave the show no other choice: She’s by far the worst in the challenge, then she straight up loses the lip sync. It’s awful! It’s terrible! It makes for a gripping week of TV!
While I think Lucky and Joella will make up the lion’s share of the conversation topics this week, there are, by my count, at least two other really interesting stories going on this week. One is Jewels vs. Onya, and the other is Hormona’s whole deal. It’s a wealth of storytelling, the kind of week that makes you appreciate the longer episode runtimes.
The challenge this week is Monopoly sponcon, which is kind of whatever. I’m a bit surprised that they didn’t want to go for an unconventional materials challenge with board games or something, but maybe they just want to save that for the ball later. No matter, this week still gives us a good rundown of the queens’ collective sewing/designing abilities (pretty good, nowhere near as good as last season’s crop), and there’s more than enough challenge-based drama to go around, so it probably works out for the better.
The B-plot of the week — though it’s probably worth calling it the A-plot of the Werk Room portion of the main episode — is a fight between Jewels Sparkles and Onya Nerve, both of whom are, it turns out, really entertaining TV personalities. Onya, it turns out, can sew but has no experience sewing garments, while Jewels is an advanced seamstress and designer. Onya asks Jewels for help, then asks if she’s using a spool of trim. Jewels says she is; Onya uses it anyway. Then, Jewels talks shit with Arrietty about the situation. I think Jewels is right in this situation since Onya asked if she could use it, and Jewels said no. But, after this fight and after Untucked, Onya’s the queen I’m more interested in this season. She has a charm to her on-stage that Jewels might not have yet, she’s clearly good at creating fully-realized characters, and she’s able to defend herself. One to watch!
The C-plot is a comparative disappointment. About halfway through the episode, the girls walk into the Werk Room for runway day, and it comes out that (off-screen) Lexi realized Hormona used stones that the show did not provide her to embellish her garment, and either just told the producers or cussed her out about it, it’s unclear. Lexi does say she “let her have it this morning,” but the sad thing is that we don’t get to see it. The fact that we don’t see the issue pop up on its own is the type of issue Drag Race is typically really good at avoiding — they famously put the queens on ice when they’re not being filmed, which I would imagine is rather difficult to do, given that these are drag queens. I wish we had seen the confrontation, but the shots of Hormona picking the stones off her dress, one by one, are really good content. It’s what makes you realize why some of the queens don’t seem to be fans of Hormona on the show, even if she hasn’t been so offensive while on camera. Anyway, this cheating storyline would be drawn out as a warmed-over Aplot in a worse week, but this week is mostly background noise. Pretty crazy!
And all that doesn’t even mention the fact that the queens get their Rate-A-Queen report cards back this week. It’s surprisingly uneventful, given that these queens seem to react strongly to just about anything. Sam Star gets a little mad at Lydia for ranking her at the bottom, but that’s kind of whatever. I was surprised to see Onya ranked so low, but she’s right that the judges clearly loved her.
Okay, let’s get to the runways. Lucky Starzzz is up first, and mama, this is garbage. I really don’t think anybody in that studio wanted Lucky to be the first queen to go, but the truth is that nothing in her package this week gave them any other choice. The outfit is ugly, and she doesn’t sell it on the runway. She barely smiles, and she’s slumped the whole time. Her choice to do “pretty girl” makeup before ever being told by the judges to do glamour makes no sense. Especially since she clearly has no facility for that style. Her face this week is the worst face I’ve seen on Drag Race in a minute. It’s really, really bad, and there’s no production manipulation that could have saved her. Also, that flat wig with an obvious bobby pin is not helping.
Hormona looks fine, wearing a gown with a trumpet skirt. Clearly, she can sew, but it’s not some great design. Lexi does a look inspired by one of Moschino’s SS19 runway looks, in which a model threw a bolt of fabric on the runway to create her train. I appreciate the reference. I like the slicked-back hair, and I think Lexi was really solidly safe this week. Suzie Toot makes a perfectly serviceable red gown, but the best part is the wig she made in the Werk Room that has devil horns. Safe Toot! Saving Arrietty for a bit later. Lana’s outfit is kind of ugly, and I think that the piece of fabric cutting off her collar bone is unfortunate, but she does manage to make a short dress fit the category, which is impressive. I believe Acacia accomplished the goal that she set out for herself when she made that dress. I don’t think that should have been a goal that anyone ever aspired to. Kori ends up in the bottom-three spot, though it’s clear she’s not going to be in the bottom two. Her outfit is competently made: She said she wanted to scoot by this week and she did. Still waiting on a good week from her, though. She has potential but hasn’t shown any facility to execute in the competition setting yet. Lydia does another ruched patchwork dress, just like the one she wore last week, only this one is uglier. Hate the hat. Still waiting for this one to show she’s not cannon fodder.
Joella wears the only thing she knows how to make: A leotard. It’s bad, and I don’t understand her commitment to this kind of shoe. Onya puts forth a fully realized character: She’s the Grande Dame from the Emerald City, cigarette holder and all. Later in Untucked, Crystal gets mad that Onya is in the top given that she sewed less competently than some of the other girls, but what Crystal does not understand is that Onya created an outfit that not only fit the challenge brief but that created a fully-realized character that she sold to the judges. Jewels, meanwhile, is one of the girls who the other contestants expected to be in the top, and her outfit is absolutely stunning, but look at the way she trots in the dress on the runway. The outfit is fabulous, but her walk is all cutesy and silly and, more to the point, un-fab. Saving Sam. Crystal goes last in an outfit that certainly completes the challenge. She looks good! I have nothing further.
So Sam and Arrietty are clearly the top two of the week, and Ru ultimately gives the win to Sam, which was a surprise for me. It largely feels like the show is more interested in putting points on the board for Sam than it feels like she beat out Arrietty’s look. Arrietty is wearing a Mexican-inspired look with an incredible wig — it feels well made and complete, and she really sells it on the runway. And her signature makeup, which I honestly don’t always love, is toned down to the point where it still feels otherworldly, but it isn’t overwhelming. Sam, meanwhile, looks good in her Southern belle dress with a dropped waist, and the hat is fabulous, but it is just a little bit more basic than Arrietty’s. She’s clearly a talented queen, but I’ve yet to fall in love with her the way that the judges, most of all Michelle, have. Her pageant drag is impeccably rendered, but I can’t help but feel like her persona, both in and out of drag, is a bit dated. Queens like Jaida Essence Hall, Sasha Colby, and even Sam’s mother Trinity have shown an ability to take pageant drag and update it to display more than just skill, but also a point of view. Sam hasn’t shown that yet, and it felt like, this week, Arrietty did. I was disappointed.
Joella and Lucky, quite rightly, end up in the lip sync to Paula Abdul’s “The Way That You Love Me.” For about 30 seconds, I held out hope that Lucky would win. Then the shoes came off. Then the words were not known. And then Joella, quite hilariously, made an arm motion that mostly involved her hinging them at the elbows while bobbing side to side, which I had never seen a queen do before (probably for good reason). She also, at one point, stands right in front of Lucky, blocking the judges from seeing her. It’s a shady move, but one that feels entirely in line with the Joella experience. And so Lucky, who I thought was one of our very top queens this season, goes home first. There is still a lot of filler to get through this season, which means that I do worry that this elimination is happening too soon, but this episode, on its own, can only be taken as a triumph.
And also on Untucked…
• I already talked the episode to death, but I haven’t yet mentioned that Sandra Bernhardt showed up. I do not think the girls knew who she was. They should have made them lip sync to a portion of Without You, I’m Nothing, With You, I’m Not Much Better.
• Do you think Untucked is so much better this season solely because the girls have the ability to talk outside the big group? I think that might be why.
• Kori gets the lip sync confessional this week again and she emcees the Rate-A-Queen results book. I’m starting to wonder if she’s better at being on TV than she is at competing on Drag Race (which was also a problem for Kori’s biggest drag inspiration, Monet, in her first season).
• Arrietty is now storyline-less sans Lucky. I bet she, like me, thought that Lucky was going to be a longer-term play for her than it ended up being.
• Trauma Makeup Corner: No time! Too much drama!
• Gay Thoughts from Coworker People: “Asian people truly contain multitudes … Nymphia struggled with imposter syndrome last season, and this season, Joella,” my fellow Vulture-ite Jennifer Zhan messaged me this week. I forced her to expand, and she said: “I actually think Joella’s confidence/delusion is kind of aspirational? Maybe we should all believe in ourselves enough that even when we’re sobbing, we can find a way to call ourselves an icon! But the way that she also keeps coming for everyone else is truly unhinged and is what makes me think she should donate her brain to science. I don’t even think she’s trying to be shady or make good TV; she really just can’t help being Like That. Lucky lost her HOME and her FOAM, and Joella is gonna hold her hand and say sorry that she’s going to beat her? So unnecessary. I rewatched it like four times.”
• Predicted Top Four: Okay, so Lucky is obviously out, and I’m going to make the most obvious pick possible and sub Sam Star in. That would leave me with Suzie, Lexi, Jewels, and now Sam, but I’m not so sure about Jewels anymore. Maybe, for the drama, I’ll try on predicting Onya for the week. That leaves me with Suzie, Lexi, Sam, and Onya — not entirely mad at that.