What Does It Mean to Be Sober Curious?

Sober curious is a term that means questioning your relationship with alcohol and thinking about trying sobriety, even if you are not ready to commit to it.

"The Sober Curious movement is a growing group of individuals who opt to drink less or not at all as a lifestyle choice," says Peter M. Vernig, PhD, a licensed psychologist and vice president of mental health services at Recovery Centers of America. "The movement pushes back at the normalization of heavy drinking and stereotypes that those who do not drink are less social or have less fun."

According to Ruby Warrington, author of "Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol," and founder of Club Söda, "[Being sober curious] means, literally, to choose to question, or get curious about, every impulse, invitation, and expectation to drink, versus mindlessly going along with the dominant drinking culture.”

Often, sober curious individuals think more consciously about the decision to drink alcohol. What makes sober curiosity so widespread, though, is its adaptable meaning. 'Sober curious' tends to mean something different to every sober curious individual, making it an inclusive cultural movement.

What Is Sober Curiosity?

Unlike sobriety, which is often a lifestyle chosen as a result of alcoholism or alcohol use disorder, sober curiosity is often defined as having the option to choose, to question, or to change your drinking habits for health-focused reasons (mental and/or physical). The sober curious movement has encouraged individuals to recognize the often-unhealthy habits that are associated with alcohol.

Being sober curious, but not fully sober, is not usually an option for those with serious alcohol disorders, in which extreme alcohol cravings, withdrawal symptoms, dangerous actions, depression, or other physically or mentally problematic symptoms result from drinking alcohol.

History of Sober Curiosity

Being sober hasn’t always been popular. Our culture, in many ways, revolves around alcohol. From tailgating at sporting events and celebrating weddings to attending happy hours and networking events, we celebrate many of life’s greatest events with champagne, wine, beer, and cocktails.

Though alcohol may not be a dangerous problem for all, it can still be a problem. You don’t have to hit 'rock bottom' to make a serious lifestyle change—and the sober curious movement recognizes that and helps to break the stigmas that have long been associated with sobriety. 

Though some individuals have been sober curious for decades, the term was created by Warrington. Her event series called Club SÖDA NYC stands for Sober or Debating Abstinence and features panels, writing workshops, and sober retreats.

“My hope is that extending the invitation to get sober curious will help people realize that there other ways to experience whatever it is [they] are seeking in alcohol—without the toxic, and often devastating, side effects,” Warrington says.

Health Benefits of Being Sober Curious

Drinking frequently or heavily has several serious health effects. In the short term, it can increase interpersonal conflict, cause hangovers, change behavior, and contribute to injuries and accidents. It can leave you tired, cause an inflammatory response that affects your immune system, and interfere with daily life. 

Abstaining from alcohol, has been shown to have health benefits. One study found that after being sober for one month, people experience decreases in blood pressure and a lower risk for alcohol-related conditions.

Other benefits of sobriety include:

• Better concentration and memory
• Better sleep
• Stronger immune system
• Lower cardiovascular risk
• Decreased risk of cancer
• More energy
• Better mental health

One study found that short-term abstinence can improve blood pressure, insulin resistance, weight, and cancer-related growth factors. Other research has found that lighter alcohol consumption is associated with a decreased risk for depression.

Why Interest in Sober Curiosity Is Growing

Often referred to as “generation sober,” the millennial generation has embraced sober curious culture and has actually made sobriety more culturally acceptable.

All across the country, individuals are opening sober bars filled with mocktails and non-alcoholic drinks such as kombucha. One reason sober bars are popping up across the country is that they remove the pressures and dangers of alcohol while providing a space for socialization and community, which all humans crave.

Evidence also suggests that Gen Z is perhaps even more interested in the sober curious or sober lifestyle than their millennial counterparts and that Gen Z consumes less alcohol than previous generations.

One potential explanation for this is that younger generations are more aware of the risks of alcohol and are more cautious about its behavioral and health effects. A study conducted by Google found that 41% of Gen Z participants associate alcohol with anxiety, vulnerability, and abuse.

Increasing numbers of young people aren't just sober curious; they are skipping alcohol altogether. A study published in JAMA Pediatrics found that the percentage of college-age students abstaining from alcohol has grown from 20 to 28% over the past twenty years.

How to Get Sober Curious

Giving up alcohol isn't always easy, especially if you are regularly in social situations where you might feel pressured to drink by friends, family, or co-workers. If you want to try being sober curious, some strategies can help you take a more mindful approach to drinking.

Pay Attention to Your Alcohol Consumption

One of the key components of being sober curious involves thinking about your own relationship with alcohol. Consider some of the reasons why you drink. Is it to cope with stress, to feel more comfortable in social situations, or to fit in with your social group? 

Make a Plan

The next step is to think about what being sober curious might mean in your life. For example, it might mean giving up alcohol for a period of time, such as participating in Dry January, or it might involve gradually decreasing your alcohol use. It might also mean limiting yourself to a single drink once each week when you are out with friends or replacing your usual cocktail with a non-alcohol option.

Sometimes, you might consider engaging in other activities that don't put drinking front and center. Or you might come up with some responses you might give if someone offers you a drink in a social situation. Simply saying "no thank you" is always an option, but you might want to prepare some excuses in case people pressure you or try to interrogate your reasons for not drinking.

Find Support

It can be helpful to talk to other people interested in being sober curious. Having a friend who is also sober curious can make it easier to navigate social situations where drinking is encouraged or expected.

You might also consider joining a support group, attending sober curious events, or visiting a sober bar or coffee shop.

Explore Sober Activities

It's also a good idea to start pursuing hobbies and activities that don't involve drinking. Ideas you might explore include local recreation centers or parks, art classes, reading, playing an instrument, or dancing.

"Many Sober Curious people choose to reduce their drinking, while others stop altogether. Whether quitting permanently or not, they often enjoy the benefits of decreased alcohol consumption including improved sleep and focus," Vernig explains.

Resources and How to Get Help

If you are interested in learning more about what it means to be sober curious, check out Ruby Warrington's book or her accompanying podcast. You can also look for events hosted by Club Söda if you want to learn more.

If you believe you might have a drinking problem or want additional help to abstain from alcohol, consider talking to your doctor or a mental health professional. Your doctor can supervise your detox, recommend treatment options, and refer you to local resources in your area that can help. They can also prescribe medications that can help with withdrawal, cravings, and abstinence.

Other resources that can help include recovery support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous and SMART Recovery.

A Word From Verywell

Health and wellness experts have, for many years, exposed the many problems associated with alcohol, from heart disease and liver disease to immune system dysfunction and cancer. Some medical experts will say red wine is good for the heart, but studies show that cutting out alcohol completely, even temporarily, is a benefit to the body.

According to the World Health Organization, there is no safe level of alcohol consumption that does not impact health.

If you’re considering sobriety, even temporarily, know that you are making a health-minded choice by going alcohol-free.