Words like “narcissism” and “toxicity” are thrown so causally around nowadays. But how much do we actually know about toxicity and abuse? Not just what TikTok or Twitter has told us. Are they a narcissist or just a jerk? What does gaslighting even look like in the workplace? Is reactive abuse even a real thing? If you need the answers to these questions (or more), look no further. Learn what abuse means, how to identify it, and how to keep yourself safe.
Not all toxic relationships are abusive; however, all abusive relationships can be considered toxic.
In a toxic relationship, there is usually a lack of respect and a violation of boundaries. Sometimes, this behavior occurs without the person even realizing they're doing it.
But, if this kind of behavior is consistently repeated with the active intent to harm the other person, the relationship could be considered abusive.
Abuse can take many forms—such as psychological, emotional, and physical abuse.
Every relationship is different and may change over time. A relationship can start out very healthy and slowly turn into something you need to fix (or get out of). And there are some important qualities that tend to characterize unhealthy relationships. These qualities are control, disrespect, poor communication, and lack of trust.
Domestic abuse can take many forms. These are some of the different types of domestic abuse: physical, sexual, neglect, emotional or psychological, financial, cultural identity abuse, technological, and immigration abuse.
Domestic abuse, also known as domestic violence or family abuse, is a pattern of behavior that is used to hurt, terrorize, manipulate, or gain control over a family member
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse because it can cause someone to doubt their own sanity, says Kristin Wilson, MA, LPC, CCTP, RYT, chief experience officer at Newport Healthcare. It's a form of emotional manipulation and abuse because it causes the person on the receiving end to question their reality. Gaslighting can come in the form of lies, denial, and other insidious means.
Narcissism, or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), is a diagnosable personality disorder characterized by behavioral patterns like grandiosity, lack of empathy, and the chronic need for admiration.
Someone who is being abused might eventually reach their breaking point and lash out at their abuser in return. This is known as reactive abuse.
Reactive abuse occurs when someone who has been abused begins to defend themselves by responding to abuse with physical and/or verbal attacks, says Alexa Connors, LMSW, a senior therapist at The Dorm, which offers intensive trauma therapy for young adults.
Trauma bonding is the attachment an abused person feels for their abuser, specifically in a relationship with a cyclical pattern of abuse.