Gina Flaig

The assumption in this question is “off”, to me, and I suspect based in AI. In front of a client, there is no need to have an “authority” contest. This is an example of low EQ. It’s likely not the first time this person has behaved accordingly, and if they don’t understand how to work with clients and teammates effectively, they probably need to reflect on why they exert such disrespect and find a new role.

First, ask if they are open to hearing your feedback. Give them an opportunity to be open to it. When delivering it, share the why/impact of the core of you noticing and sharing, which is likely tied to assisting their success. And remember to share all kinds of feedback, not just the negative stuff.

Instead of managers simply copy and pasting what the employee wrote (disengagement on steriods), move beyond the perf mgmt "system" and have regular conversations that include feedback and two-way conversations. Start the commentary in reviews "As we'd discussed throughout this peformance period...". The system is merely a portal to reflect past conversations; don't make it a replacement for dialogue.

Move forward. Test things. Try things. Keep a learner’s mindset and continue to iterate. Be willing to let go of things that didn’t work out and move on. Give up the concept of perfection and adopt minimal viable products, enabling feedback from others.

Providing space to "name" the fears or concerns is important. Such a discussion likely reveals items that need to be directly considered and addressed e.g. impact to customers, time needed to learn new skills, etc. It is common that decisions are made without considering the impact on all stakeholders and/or all of the related details. Listening and taking in the data to provide guidance and perspectives is important for any change to be adopted as intended. Listening must go beyond placating people.

And to further understand, couple listening with asking for examples to clarify what you are hearing. Ask “what specific behaviors do you need to see more or less of”. Follow up, proactively, to verify progress and check back to confirm if your manager or other stakeholders has/have seen the expected behavior change(s). Understand the impact of why your manager is sharing any feedback. Most managers choose not to directly share feedback, so getting clear on the why will always be helpful. Onward!