'Horrible Histories: The Movie - Rotten Romans (2019)' isn't very good. It's harmless enough, of course, but it really isn't anything special. I mean, it's just not funny. There are maybe two or three smile-worthy gags but that's about it. The rest of the time, the jokes fall flat and that's an issue when the jokes are, realistically, the entire point of the piece. The narrative is, basically, as basic as possible, focused around a kind of platonic 'Romeo and Juliet' (sans suicide). It wraps itself up in a weirdly rushed and unsatisfying way, backtracking upon its recently established stakes to just sort of finish for no real reason. This is probably because it wants to remain as kid-friendly as possible, despite its numerous on-screen deaths, and requires an overtly 'happy ending' to do so. This is, essentially, the product of a half-baked screenplay. The central character conflict is, too; it heads in a traditional direction but then doesn't get properly addressed in the finale, simply wrapping up as if it's been properly tended to. However, it's probably worth noting that these now glaring narrative issues are, for me, only noticeable in retrospect. That's not because the flick is so engaging so as to make them non-bothersome. In fact, quite the opposite. The story isn't compelling in any real way. It's serviceable stuff but there's no real meat to it. The same can be said of the entire affair, really. Even though it's probably one of the least effective films of the year, it's difficult to actively dislike because it seems earnest and sticks to the very 'DIY' attitude of its source television show. It would've been nice if it had featured that series' original cast but, as it is, it's an average experience that I don't really have any strong feelings about either way. I suppose that says something in itself, doesn't it? 5/10
