"What is the reason for this abomination?" is something you might think if you take a gander at Ukrainian-based brand Ksenia Schaider's unique asymmetrical denim, or as I like to call them, Franken-jeans. One side is wide-legged, and the other is straight—and while it evokes a certain ~vibe~, I wasn't convinced it was mine. Schnaider's reconstructed denim pieces have gained popularity among the likes of Bella Hadid, Dua Lipa, and the general fashion influencer set, but when these were released in February, they quickly went viral for very obvious reasons.
According to Vogue, Ksenia (who heads the label with her husband Anton) based the pants on two of their best-selling styles, combining them into one design. Genius? Absurd? You decide. Naturally, upon seeing them, my first thought was, "Wow, I'd love to wear these IRL to see people's hilarious reactions," and the whole Cosmo fashion team agreed.
When they came a few weeks later, I put them on—one leg into the skinny hole and the other into the wide one—and man, did they feel just as odd as they looked. My initial observations when glancing in the mirror? They were so long that I had to wear heeled boots so they wouldn't drag on the floor, and compared to the breezy feeling of the looser side, the more tapered one made my other leg feel claustrophobic. Plus, there was the fact that I just looked so...lopsided. I seriously dreaded going outside, thinking of all the stares I was about to get and fully expecting someone to come up to me and ask, "What the f*ck are you wearing?!" (It is New York City.)
"You're going to be embarrassed to be seen with me, huh?" I asked my boyfriend Max, who sometimes has Strong Opinions about my more adventurous 'fits. But his reaction was more of a shrug. "They're really fine," he said.
Wearing the Jeans in the Wild
I committed to our Sunday plan, which was heading to Willamsburg, Brooklyn, together, grabbing coffee and reading at a café, and then going to a movie theater to see Greta (don't befriend lonely old ladies, folks!).
When I finally mustered up the confidence to venture outside, it wasn't nearly as terrible as I thought. Sure, I did get *some* odd looks on the subway and while walking around, but that was really it.
The longer I wore the jeans, the less I thought about them. While I was wondering why people weren't commenting on them or blatantly staring with a confused look on their face, it dawned on me: Duh, I'm in Brooklyn, and this is probably the least unusual ensemble these folks have seen today.
When we got to the coffee shop where one of my most outspoken friends works, he didn't notice either. All day, I waited for someone to be offended by my choice of jeans, but other than the minimal staring, there were zero reactions. I walked to the movie theater, took the subway back home, went to the grocery store, and...nada. No questions. No whispers. No funny comments. Nothing. "Maybe they're not as strange as I thought?" I wondered.
More Wacky Denim Pieces, If That's What You're Into
Triple-Layered
Okay, But Would I Wear 'Em Again?
What I initially envisioned as a funny fashion experiment took an unexpectedly deep turn: It was a classic case of the "Spotlight Effect." I was so self-conscious at the beginning of the day, walking around in these two-in-one jeans, but when it finally came time to take them off, I realized probably nobody else thought about them as much as I did. In other words: We pay way too much attention to what we think other people notice about us, and in reality, the things we're so insecure about aren't even crossing their minds. Hell. Yes.
So did I did learn a valuable lesson in psychology? Totally. Will I wear these jeans again? Absolutely not.
I'm Cosmopolitan's Associate Fashion Editor and write about any and all trends, major celeb fashion moments, and why wide-leg jeans are basically the best. I originally moved to New York City to audition for RENT, only to find out that the play closed 10 years ago.
