"That Kills It For Me": Guys Are Sharing Things Women Do That Totally Turn Them Off, And I'm Curious What Your Thoughts Are On Some Of These

    As a woman, some of these are icks for me, too, tbh.

    I'm guilty of chatting with my female friends about icks we get from guys, so it only felt right to share men's icks and turn-offs about women. Here is what some men shared in this thread that I stumbled upon:

    Note: Some of these responses have been edited for length and/or clarity. 

    1. "No reciprocation of efforts."

    A woman and man smiling at each other while seated at an outdoor café table, each holding a drink

    2. "Rude and demeaning attitudes. Like, aggressively rude or demeaning. That kills it for me."

    u/TattedPastor412

    3. "No hobbies (people who cannot amuse themself usually demand your full attention, making you unable to practice your own hobbies). Negativity is another one. Not all days are good, but people who complain about every detail, even if their day would be considered amazing by most, are a pain."

    Two people playing basketball outdoors. One dribbles the ball in mid-action, while the other defends. No celebrity or red carpet context present

    4. "When a woman doesn’t hold herself to the same standard that she holds her man. Not to say that the roles and responsibilities of each party need to be exactly the same in any given relationship, but it’s the worst when a woman acts a certain way/has a certain attitude but gets upset when the man acts that way as well."

    u/wesagod

    5. "When their dating profile is a list of qualities they want in a man, but doesn't say anything about what they're like or what they bring to a relationship."

    Person using a dating app on a smartphone outdoors, looking at a profile picture of a woman with long hair

    6. "Lack of clear and effective communication. If you want or don't want something, make that excessively clear, with no ambiguity. If it's a big thing and the other person isn't getting it, sit them down in a non-emotionally charged situation, warn them you will be talking about something serious, and then go over it with them until they get it."

    u/Edumacator239

    7. "Treating people like servers, bartenders, or cashiers like complete garbage is a huge red flag, and it shows what type of person they really are."

    Two people in a coffee shop, one with gray hair facing a counter, the other with dark hair and apron, standing behind the counter, talking

    8. "The ones who think they need to cut down every other female they see. It's repulsive. No, Karen. I didn't notice the top that woman was wearing until you pointed it out, but even now that I have, it's still not as tacky as the sewage you keep spewing from your mouth."

    u/jtf3983

    9. "If I'm the only one who can even start a text conversation, it tells me I'm only there to be an ego boost. For example, I MUST be the one to say 'good morning' first. If not, I'm met with silence, possibly for a few days, followed by a passive-aggressive message about me 'not being interested.' I'm in my late 40s. I broke up with my first girlfriend in grade seven over this exact issue. (Phone calls, not texts, obviously.) Find an immature fool if you want to play immature, foolish games."

    u/Pimp_Daddy_76

    10. "If they only have guy 'friends.' Claims other women are 'too much drama.' Coincidentally is always involved in drama and loves gossip. Always talks about 'haters' and 'fans.'"

    A happy couple at an outdoor event, each holding a cup, with the sun setting behind them, creating a warm and joyful atmosphere

    11. "The silent treatment. It’s passive-aggressive, manipulative, whack bullshit."

    u/Additional-Stay-4355

    12. "Romanticizing or unable to move past their exes, and refusing to stop messaging them because 'They're really important to me.'"

    u/KeisuketheLoser

    13. "I recently visited Santorini. One evening, I had dinner at a place overlooking a very popular spot with an amazing view of the island and the water. I lost count of how many Insta girls dragged their dead-eyed boyfriends there and proceeded to cycle through two dozen look-at-me poses while whining photo instructions. Treating people in your life like props or unpaid crew just so you can appear glamorous on social media is a major ick."

    A person on a boat takes a selfie while another captures the moment with a phone. They're enjoying a scenic view on the water, suggesting romance and leisure

    14. "When I feel like I'm putting more effort into the relationship than she is."

    u/captnameless88

    15. "Girls who push you away and then expect to be chased. Huge ick and generally a red flag that signals you will be expected to do everything in the relationship. No partnership there. Also, double standards. For example, it's okay for a woman to turn down her man's advances, but when he turns down hers, then he's being insensitive or cruel. That one also reeks of manipulative behavior. Finally, have a job and be working toward some sort of career. You don't need a college degree, but working a retail job with no future prospects ain't gonna cut it."

    u/ShenaniganNinja

    If you have thoughts on this topic, share them with me in the comments below!