How to Create the Perfect Engagement Card Message

Someone in your life is engaged—and what better way to send a few congratulatory words than with a sweet, heartfelt card? It’s a small gesture that can make a huge difference for both the sender (that would be you!) and the happy couple, ushering them into this new chapter of life with words of encouragement and support. And who knows? Your card may be saved in a scrapbook or keepsake box for generations as a precious memento. Not to mention, your friends will be filled with joy to see that you took the time to craft a note in honor of their financé(e) status.

Here's another reason why writing an engagement card is a great idea: It's not a hard task! All you need to do is jot down a few sincere words and you're done. Plus, we've made things easier for you with our guide on what to write in an engagement card. Ahead, get all the pro tips you need, including several examples to help inspire your own note.

Are Engagement Cards Necessary?

Engagement cards aren't necessary, but they’re always appreciated. “A gift (and that’s ultimately what a nice card is) is never ‘necessary’ but I think it's a nice touch that makes a couple feel loved and celebrated during a special time, and it costs you, what, $4.99?” says bridal and lifestyle influencer Justina Sharp. “Absolutely a worthwhile price to pay to bring a little magic to the moment.”

What's more, it’ll make you feel good too. “Research shows that expressing thankfulness, gratitude, and congratulations has enormous benefits for both the giver and the givee,” says etiquette expert Jo Hayes. “It can boost feelings of well-being, gratefulness, and appreciation, and foster healthy, prosperous relationships.” Hayes further adds that it’s “appropriate and exceedingly kind” to send an engagement card, with or without a gift. 

What to Write in an Engagement Card

Don’t overthink it! The message doesn’t need to be lengthy or packed with good advice or shared memories—it can absolutely be short and sweet. “A simple card expressing one’s heartfelt congratulations is all that is needed,” says Hayes. For example, something as easy as “Congratulations! I’m so happy for you and thankful to be a part of your journey together” works well. If you’re close to the couple, feel free to add a personal note or happy memory or share why you think they’re so perfect for each other. 

But no matter what you decide to write, be warm, thoughtful, and sincere in your words. “The key thing to include in the card is how hearing the news of the engagement made you feel,” says etiquette expert Nick Leighton. “It doesn't have to be lengthy, but it does need to be sincere.” Additionally, remember that tone doesn’t always come across as intended via written word, so keep it straightforward. “This is not the time to try out new jokes, be snarky, or make subtle digs at someone in the couple,” says Sharp, who advises staying away from inside jokes or any references to wedding plans. “You are not auditioning for a wedding invitation, you’re congratulating them on what’s happening right now!” Leighton agrees, adding, “Avoid including anything that suggests you expect to be invited to the wedding.”

Engagement Card Etiquette Rules to Know

Anyone can send an engagement card; you don’t have to be BFFs with the bride or groom to write one. But before you start jotting things down, be sure to follow the below etiquette rules when crafting your heartfelt congratulations.

Opt for a blank card—and write a personal message.

Leighton recommends opting for a blank card versus something with a pre-printed message, as it feels more genuine. This is also the time to splurge on a “nicer” card made of heavier cardstock versus something you could grab for $2. Meaning, if you have the ability to upgrade your card game, do so! 

Send the card swiftly.

Timing is also important here; don’t wait too long to share your best wishes. Send your card within a month of the engagement news if at all possible, suggests Hayes.

Don't use the couple's married titles.

Address the card to the couple, not to “Mr. and Mrs.,” given they’re not married yet. "Traditionally you would still address grooms-to-be as ‘Mr.’ and brides-to-be as ‘Ms.’ as they are not officially married yet,” wedding expert Hovik Harutyunyan shares. “For a fun, modern take you can address the envelope: ‘To the Future Mr & Mrs./Mr. & Mr./Mrs. & Mrs’. For gender-inclusivity, you can address it as ‘To the Happily Engaged Couple’; ‘To My Favorite Love Birds/Soulmates/Life Partners/Couple’; ‘The Newlyweds-to-Be’; or ‘To the Future Mx. & Mx.’”

Consider including a celebratory gift.

If you’re close to the couple, you may want to consider sending a small, celebratory gift as well, like a bottle of champagne or some toasting flutes. Trust us, the couple will greatly appreciate it.

Sample Engagement Card Messages

Ready for a bit of inspiration to get those creative juices flowing? If you can’t wait to get started, take a look at some of our favorite engagement card message examples below.

A Simple Engagement Card Message

Dear [names], 
Congratulations on your engagement! Wishing you the warmest regards as you move into this next chapter of your lives. 
Love, 
[name]

A Personal Engagement Card Message

Dear [names], 
Congratulations on your engagement! I am so pleased that my best friend found her perfect soul mate. Wishing you the most blissful marriage! 
Love, 
[name]

An Engagement Card Message for Siblings

Dear [names], 
Congratulations on your engagement! I am so pleased for you little bro/little sis/big bro/big sis…and welcome to the family, [name of partner]! We’re so glad you’re here.
Love, 
[name]

A Lighthearted Engagement Card Message

Dear [names], 
Congrats on your big news! Glad that you two are finally putting a ring on it. Let’s make this thing official, shall we? 
Love, 
[name]

A Reminiscent Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congrats on your engagement! Who’d have known that a chance meeting in a Spanish restaurant would turn into the romance of the century? You two give me hope for love! 
Love, 
[name]

A Pop Culture-Influenced Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congrats! When I say that I have never met a more perfect couple, I mean it. You two are the John Legend and Chrissy Teigan of our friendship group. Love ya! 
Love, 
[name]

A Cute Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congrats! You two are absolutely made for each other. I’m so glad you think so too. Wishing you all the best when you tie the knot. 
Love, 
[name]

A Heartfelt Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congrats! Words cannot describe how truly happy I am for both of you. Excited to watch you take the next steps in your journey. 
Love, 
[name]

A Romantic Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congratulations on your engagement! May your wedding bring you all of the joy you deserve. So happy for you two lovebirds.
Love, 
[name]

A Funny Engagement Card Message

Dear [names],
Congrats on your big news! Remember: Never laugh at your partner’s choices—you are one of them now. 
Love, 
[name]