Gypsy-Rose Blanchard Breaks Down 'Heartbreaking' Divorce from Ryan Anderson: 'It's Been Hard' (Exclusive)

It’s been just five months since Gypsy-Rose Blanchard walked out of Missouri’s Chillicothe Correctional Center, where she’d spent more than eight years of a 10-year sentence for her role in the murder of her mother, Dee Dee Blanchard. On the day of her release, Dec. 28, she walked straight into the arms of husband Ryan Anderson.

But much has changed in that time and Blanchard, 32, opens up to PEOPLE exclusively in this week's issue about the many transitions she's made in life and in love.

“I’d describe the Gypsy-Rose who went into prison as someone who was very lost and confused,” says Blanchard, 32. “Now she’s a little bit more wise, has a little bit more experience under her belt and is still very hopeful for the future.”

She also looks a little bit different — thanks to blonde highlights and recent cosmetic surgery on her nose — as she prepares to reintroduce herself to the public on the Lifetime docuseries Gypsy Rose: Life After Lockup, premiering June 3.

By far the biggest change has been the recent upheaval of her love life. Currently in the midst of a divorce from Ryan Anderson, whom she wed behind bars in 2022, Gypsy-Rose says, “It’s heartbreaking, because no one gets married to get a divorce. Processing those emotions has been hard.”

A friend of Blanchard's previously revealed to PEOPLE that the split happened after a bad argument in March and that Gypsy-Rose thought her husband was “controlling.” Anderson has denied such behavior.

Blanchard however, feels she did what's best for her, and is now free, again.

"I think that there is a sense of freedom of following your heart, following what you feel like is right for you," she explains. "In my marriage, I felt like a part of me was lost in it, and so I feel like I found that missing piece of myself that I always felt was lost and now reclaiming that back. I definitely feel a sense of belonging in that space."

The two are in the midst of divorce and Blanchard has requested spousal support. Despite fan speculation around the relationship timeline and Blanchard's intentions with Anderson, she says, "I did love Ryan."

After separating from Anderson, she returned home to live with her stepmom Kristy and her father, Rod, in Cut Off, La., and has reunited with her former fiancé Ken Urker, whom she also met while in prison and whose continued presence in her life was a point of concern for Anderson.

“I’m in love,” she says about her relationship with Urker, 31, who initially reconnected with her as a friend. “He was a support when I was going through emotional hardship. But then I let myself open up to the feelings I’ve always had for him. For the first time in my life, I’m doing something that makes me happy — I’m prioritizing me.”