What to expect when contacting our helpline

When you need help, taking the first step is often the hardest part.

So we try to make this as easy as we can. Whether you phone, email or webchat with us, you’ll get a courteous, respectful and high-quality service, offering you the most appropriate help and support.

Your call in detail

• The first thing you’ll hear when contacting our helpline is a message reassuring you that your call is confidential and explaining that we offer about 30 minutes for each call. But this is general guidance and the advisor will offer more time if you need it.
• You’ll then be connected to an advisor, or you might need to wait in a queue. If you’re in a queue, you can stay on the line for as long as you like, which hopefully won’t be long. If you don’t want to queue, you can email the helpline or use our webchat during its opening hours

There’s also information on our website that might be helpful, including factsheets about legal matters.

• When you get through to an advisor, you might not know what to say. You might think we won’t believe you or take you seriously. But our advisors are experienced and trained to listen to you without judgement, so they can help you in the best way possible. They’ve supported thousands of men who felt just as nervous as you.
• The advisor might ask questions to better understand your situation and level of risk. But you can share as much or as little as you like, and you don’t have to answer any questions if you’re not comfortable.

What will the advisor ask?

• They might ask questions to understand your situation better and give you relevant advice. But it’s up to you what you say.
• They’ll want to understand your level of risk to help you plan your safety better. Some of these questions might come across as too personal, so if you don’t want to answer, you can just tell them you’re not ready.
• They won’t ask you to prove you’re experiencing domestic abuse.
• They won’t ask for your name, date of birth or address. The call is confidential and anonymous.
• At the end of the call, we’ll ask you some monitoring questions required by our funders:
  • How did you hear about the helpline?
  • How old are you?
  • How would you describe your gender and sexual orientation?
  • What’s your ethnic group?
  • Which local authority do you live in?

You can’t be identified by your responses, but it’s okay if you’d rather not answer.

• Your advisor won’t pressure you to do anything. They might give you suggestions to help with your situation, like contacting organisations to help with legal advice, child contact, counselling, housing and other issues. But what you do is up to you.
• Most of all, they’ll listen to you and validate your story. With their help, you can begin to make sense of your experience and get some clarity.

Who you’ll speak to

We have male and female advisors. If you get through to a female advisor and would like to speak to a man (or vice-versa), just tell them and they’ll transfer you to another member of the team, if one is available.

When you email us

We aim to reply to emails within five working days.

When we talk on webchat

Our webchat is available every Wednesday from 10-11.30am and 2.30-4pm. Your chat will be connected to an advisor if one is available. Once connected, we kindly request that you try to respond within 2 minutes, so that the Advisor can focus on helping you and your webchat is not terminated.

Get in touch and let’s talk it over.