Talk:Motivation and emotion/Book/2024/Ego death: Difference between revisions
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DOI: [[doi:10.1136/medethics-2020-106070|10.1136/medethics-2020-106070]] [[User:U3230258|U3230258]] ([[User talk:U3230258|discuss]] • [[Special:Contributions/U3230258|contribs]]) 20:30, 5 October 2024 (UTC) |
DOI: [[doi:10.1136/medethics-2020-106070|10.1136/medethics-2020-106070]] [[User:U3230258|U3230258]] ([[User talk:U3230258|discuss]] • [[Special:Contributions/U3230258|contribs]]) 20:30, 5 October 2024 (UTC) |
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<!-- Official book chapter feedback --> |
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{{MEBF/2024 |
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|1= |
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<!-- Overall comments... --> |
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# Overall, this is an excellent chapter. It successfully uses psychological theory and research to address a practical, real-world phenomenon or problem. |
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<!-- Overall – Citations --> |
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# Reasonably good use of academic, peer-reviewed citations to support claims |
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# Use of academic, peer-reviewed citations is lacking in some places (e.g., see the {{fact}} tags) |
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<!-- Overall – Copyedits --> |
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# For additional feedback, see the following comments and [https://en.wikiversity.org/w/index.php?title=Motivation_and_emotion%2FBook%2F2024%2FEgo_death&diff=2672346&oldid=2661775 these copyedits] |
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|2= |
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<!-- Overview comments... --> |
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# Well developed |
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<!-- Overview – Case study --> |
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# Engages reader via a case study or scenario in a feature box with a relevant image |
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# It could be made more obvious how the scenario demonstrates "ego death" |
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<!-- Overview – Explains problem --> |
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# Explains the problem or phenomenon in a balanced way |
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# See in-text comments for some specific suggestions |
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<!-- Overview – Focus questions --> |
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# Promising focus questions |
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# I've reworded some of the focus questions for clarity, but retained the intent |
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|3= |
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<!-- Theory comments... --> |
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<!-- Theory – Breadth --> |
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# An excellent range of relevant theories are selected, described, and explained |
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<!-- Theory – Builds on --> |
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# Builds reasonably well on related chapters and/or Wikipedia articles |
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<!-- Theory – Depth --> |
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# Insightful depth is provided about relevant theory(ies) |
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<!-- Theory – Tables/Lists/Figures --> |
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# Some use of tables, figures, and/or lists are to help convey key theoretical information |
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<!-- Theory – Citations --> |
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# Key citations are well used |
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<!-- Theory – Examples --> |
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# Very good use of examples to illustrate theoretical concepts |
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|4= |
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<!-- Research comments... --> |
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<!-- Research – Key findings --> |
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# Very good review of relevant research |
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# More detail about key studies would be ideal |
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# Any systematic reviews or meta-analyses in this area? |
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<!-- Research – Critical thinking --> |
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# Basic critical thinking about relevant research is evident |
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# Critical thinking about research could be further evidenced by: |
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## describing the methodology (e.g., sample, measures) in important studies |
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## considering the strength of relationships |
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## acknowledging limitations |
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## pointing out critiques/counterarguments |
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## suggesting ''specific'' directions for future research |
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# Some claims are unreferenced (e.g., see the {{fact}} tags) |
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|5= |
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<!-- Integration comments... --> |
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# Very good integration between theory and research |
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# The chapter places more emphasis on theory than on research |
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|6= |
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<!-- Conclusion comments... --> |
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# Very good |
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# Excellent, practical, take-home message(s) |
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|7= |
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<!-- Written expression – Style comments... --> |
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<!-- Written expression – Written expression --> |
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# Written expression |
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## Overall, the quality of written expression is very good |
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<!-- Written expression – Language --> |
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## Use 3rd person perspective (e.g., "it") rather than 1st (e.g., "we") or 2nd person (e.g., "you") perspective[https://www.grammarly.com/blog/first-second-and-third-person/] in the main text, although 1st or 2nd person perspective can work well for case studies or feature boxes |
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<!-- Written expression – Layout --> |
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# Layout |
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## The chapter is well structured, with major sections using sub-sections |
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## I moved the criticisms section into the psychedelics section |
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<!-- Written expression – Grammar --> |
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# Grammar, spelling, and proofreading are excellent |
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<!-- Written expression – Abbreviations --> |
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## Abbreviations |
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### Spell out abbreviations on their first use, to explain them to the reader |
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<!-- Written expression – APA style --> |
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# APA style |
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## Use [[w:Serial comma|serial comma]]s[https://www.buzzfeed.com/adamdavis/the-oxford-comma-is-extremely-important-and-everyone-should]. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBx8ooDupXY Video] (1 min) |
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## Use double (not single) quotation marks "to introduce a word or phrase used as an ironic comment, as slang, or as an invented or coined expression" (APA 7th ed., 2020, p. 159) |
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<!-- Written expression – Figures --> |
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## Figures |
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### Figures are reasonably well captioned |
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### Refer to each Figure using APA style (e.g., check and correct capitalisation) |
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<!-- Written expression – Tables --> |
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## Tables |
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### Use APA style for captions. [[Motivation and emotion/Assessment/Chapter/Tables|See example]] |
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### Refer to each Table using APA style |
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<!-- Written expression – Citations --> |
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## Citations use excellent APA style (7th ed.) |
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<!-- Written expression – References --> |
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## References use excellent/very good/good/reasonably good/basic/poor APA style: |
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### Remove " Retrieved from " |
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### Include hyperlinked dois |
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### Some publication details missing (e.g., Wellender, 2022) |
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|8= |
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<!-- Learning features comments... --> |
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# Excellent use of learning features |
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<!-- Learning features - Links --> |
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# Excellent use of embedded in-text [[m:Help:Interwiki linking|interwiki links]] to Wikipedia articles |
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<!-- Learning features – Images etc. --> |
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# Excellent use of image(s) |
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# Excellent use of table(s) |
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# Excellent use of feature box(es) |
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# Good use of case studies or examples |
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<!-- Learning features – Quizzes --> |
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# Very good use of quiz(zes) and/or reflection question(s) |
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<!-- Learning features – See also, external links --> |
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# Excellent use of interwiki links in the "See also" section |
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# Excellent use of external links in the "External links" section |
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|9= |
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<!-- Social contribution comments... --> |
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# ~30+ logged, useful, mostly moderate to major social contributions with direct links to evidence |
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# Thanks very much for your extensive contributions |
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}} |
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-- [[User:Jtneill|Jtneill]] - <small>[[User talk:Jtneill|Talk]] - [[Special:Contributions/Jtneill|c]]</small> 04:15, 15 October 2024 (UTC) |
Revision as of 04:15, 15 October 2024
Provide further links to key terms
Hi Dani,
This is very well written and presented very nicely. The images you have chosen fit nicely !I think your chapter could benefit from a few more links to key terms e.g. dissolution, consciousness, mindfulness. I think this would help the reader get more info and further background on these terms.
Kind regards, u3126684
References incorrectly formatted
Hey @Danikollas:, I was just checking out your references, and they look great, however, there are some minor errors in the formatting, click 'here' to check out APA 7th edition referencing. Also here is one of your references adjusted (Epstein, M. (1988). The deconstruction of the self: Ego and “egolessness” in Buddhist insight meditation. The Journal of Transpersonal Psychology, 20(1), 61–69. Retrieved from https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=b9fa967838934c041dffc5ad71f169fbcc70ea82)
Initial suggestions
@Danikollas: Thanks for tackling this topic. Some initial suggestions:
- Check out other related chapters and see how you can build on, link to, and integrate with that work:
- Also search past book chapters for related topics
- For the topic development, consider:
- What psychological theory(ies) can help to understand and explain this topic?
- What is the main research in this area?
- Let me know if I can do anything else to support the development of this chapter.
Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:33, 10 August 2024 (UTC)
Heading casing
Hi Danikollas. FYI, the recommended Wikiversity heading style uses sentence casing. For example: Self-determination theory rather than Self-Determination Theory Here's an example chapter with correct heading casing: Growth mindset development -- Jtneill - Talk - c 09:34, 10 August 2024 (UTC) |
- @Danikollas: Just a reminder to use sentence casing for the headings. Sincerely, James -- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:48, 14 August 2024 (UTC)
Removal of unnecessary headings
Hey, I saw that you still have your key points, learning features, and figures, as headings. I am not sure if this needs to be removed for the topic development or not, maybe worth checking with James. If you remove them and still want to reference back to them, you can click here — Preceding unsigned comment added by [[User:{{{1}}}|{{{1}}}]] ([[User talk:{{{1}}}#top|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/{{{1}}}|contribs]])
Topic development feedback
The topic development submission has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is below, plus see the general feedback page. Please also check the page history for changes made whilst reviewing the chapter plan. Responses to this feedback can be made by starting a new section below and/or contacting the reviewer. Marks are available via UCLearn. Marks are based on the latest version before the due date. |
1. Title
2. Headings
3. Overview
4. Key points
5. Figure
7. References
8. Resources
9. User page
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-- Jtneill - Talk - c 05:55, 24 August 2024 (UTC)
Comment
Thanks for your comment on the UC discussion board! I've read through your chapter and found it super interesting! I was wondering if you might find it useful to incorporate in some research on the impact of a near death experience and its effect on the dissolution of the ego - I hope you find this article helpful file:///Users/nicolewilliams/Downloads/brainsci-11-00929.pdf U3235875 (discuss • contribs) 00:34, 26 September 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you!! I originally included NDE's but I was way over my word count and there was limited research on it so decided to cut it.
- I unfortunately cannot open that link to the pdf either! Are you able to resend at all as I will definitely reconsider and see if it is worthwhile to add the research! Danikollas (discuss • contribs) 06:48, 27 September 2024 (UTC)
- Sorry @Danikollasplease try this link! https://doi.org/10.3390/brainsci11070929 U3235875 (discuss • contribs) 01:10, 4 October 2024 (UTC)
Feedback
Hi @Danikollas,
Great work on your chapter so far, I found it very interesting to read. Your opening case study is very engaging but perhaps you could add an internal link to psilocybin in case readers are unsure of what this means. I find it helpful to add these in "edit source" rather than the "edit" mode. Here's a helpful page if you need:https://meta.wikimedia.org/wiki/Help:Interwiki_linking_on_Wikimedia_wikis
Hope this helps and all the best with your chapter! :) U3216883 (discuss • contribs) 00:57, 2 October 2024 (UTC)
Feedback
Hey @Danikollas,
really enjoyed reading through your chapter!
I wanted to offer some feedback surrounding your 5th focus question "What are the ethical consideration and potential risks associated with facilitating ego death"
While the risks were pretty clearly outlined in the criticisms section, I would love to see some discussion surrounding further ethical considerations of the treatment.
If your interested I found a source talking about informed consent and how it should be implemented, along with concerns about how it would impact the treatment itself.
DOI: 10.1136/medethics-2020-106070 U3230258 (discuss • contribs) 20:30, 5 October 2024 (UTC)
Book chapter review and feedback
This chapter has been reviewed according to the marking criteria. Written feedback is provided below, plus there is a general feedback page. Please also check the chapter's page history to check for editing changes made whilst reviewing through the chapter. Chapter marks will be available via UCLearn along with social contribution marks and feedback. Keep an eye on Announcements. |
Overall
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-- Jtneill - Talk - c 04:15, 15 October 2024 (UTC)