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Reacher: Fly Boy (2024)
Badly written and executed
I'll state off the bat that I've never read a Jack Reacher novel and was therefore was not in the slightest bit peeved at the casting of Tom Cruise in two movies. But okay, Alan Ritchson cuts an impressive, imposing figure and has the requisite steel jaw and impossibly huge biceps to make this Reacher unique. The problem with S2 is four-fold:
Firstly, it's another plot-based story that requires an endless amount of exposition by the characters. And one of the techniques they use over and over is to have the four main characters take turns in delivering a line of this explanatory dialogue. People don't talk like that, and it just feels like we're being spoon-fed information.
Secondly, the 'plot armour' is frankly ridiculous. There isn't an ounce of tension to any of the scenes, since every henchman - even when armed with a machine gun - will fail to hit any of Team Reacher. And if one of the team *does* happen to get shot or stabbed, it will not impede their ability to continue fighting (and winning).
Thirdly, none of the characters are interesting. Not in the slightest. I couldn't care less whether any of them (Reacher included) lived or died. Actually, that's not true. I liked Russo, but only up to the point that he needlessly walked into a hail of gunfire because, you know, he's a hero trying to protect a young girl. Except he would have failed miserably in that task had Team Reacher not arrived at the 59th second to run over the child's would-be assassin.
Lastly, the violence. While it's not wall to wall (thankfully), the scenes of visceral violence felt forced in, to compensate for a generally poor production.
Everything about this season screams lazy writing. Paper thin characters, plot, tension, all of which is horribly predictable. Didn't we all know from episode 1 that Robert Patrick would end up hurled out of a helicopter?
Unless they ditch the Dummies Guide To TV Tropes, I won't be watching a third season.
Goosebumps: Night of the Living Dummy: Part 2 (2023)
Why ... ?
So this episode could have been a semi-decent start to a new season: exploring Nathan Bratt's history, with some fairly strong character motivations that lead to bad decisions. But it's a weird move to start this arc after a fairly conclusive episode 8.
Bratt's story is at least moderately interesting, and Justin Long has great screen presence. The evolving teen romance-drama, on the other hand, is just tedious. They're obviously going for the same vibe Stranger Things attempted in S3, though that was equally tedious. Yet Stranger Things had far more interesting characters than the rather flat five we have here.
Overall, this entire season could probably have been done in 6 strong episodes, rather than a needlessly protracted 10.
Goosebumps: You Can't Scare Me (2023)
Packed to the hilt with tropes
So far, the show has been largely enjoyable with some great production quality (including effects) and genuinely funny moments. But this episode was just full of awful tropes, especially with Biddle-Bratt chasing Nora through the snow. He has a badly injured leg (broken?), yet admirably manages to keep pace with her. Then he insists on screaming out her name so she knows exactly where he is?
As for the evolving teen romances ... I could not care less that Isaiah likes Margot but she now likes Lucas who also likes her, not forgetting poor Isabella who up until now has had no romantic entanglements whatsoever but finds herself starry-eyed over Isaiah because he pulled her out of a crumbling parallel void.
All that said, the show would have ended on a reasonable note. Except they decided to spin out two more episodes ...
Goosebumps: The Cuckoo Clock of Doom (2023)
Loving it!
I watched every episode of the original Goosebumps and, while broadly enjoyable, it had some truly awful acting in places that affected the entire tone of the episode.
There are two major boons to this new incarnation. The first is that the acting and production values are *much* better, probably because these 'teenagers' are actually all in their mid-twenties.
The second improvement is the decision to take the basic premise of the original stories and weave them into a continuous narrative. There's a wider story here, told through different characters and their connection to certain items (camera, mask, clock, etc.).
There was some genuinely funny humour in this episode, and I like the way they're linking everything back to that fateful Halloween party.
So far, this is panning out as a solid new take on the concept.
Hot in Cleveland: The Sex That Got Away (2010)
Tacky
Hot In Cleveland has so far been a genuinely funny look at three middle-aged women (plus Elka) making a new start in life, with some novel twists on subjects like blind dates.
The Sex That Got Away is just a tacky story about Victoria wanting to have sex with an old flame, and the comedy is pretty smutty in places.
There were some funny moments in the hotel room which could have been more germaine to the story - the idea that two old lovers are now just old lovers. But overall, the gags aren't particular funny, Mel's misunderstood gestures were largely predictable, and Joy had practically no storyline at all.
A poor entry, that does nothing to endear the characters to us.
Last Man Standing: Cabin Pressure (2019)
Clunky sentimentalism
It feels like the writers wanted to do a piece on technology addiction and therefore used the 'young ones' to run with it. I can totally believe that Mandy would be a social media addict, but Kristen doesn't seem the type to come round and sit on her phone.
When the siblings finally have a conversation together, it all feels very contrived as they reveal how much they admire one another.
The side plot with Jen didn't really land, either. She was deceitful and disrespectful, which seems a big leap from the character introduced a few episodes back.
Still an enjoyable episode, as always, but the plot and characterisation was off.
Last Man Standing: Common Ground (2019)
Loving Jen!
I thought Jen's character had great potential when she was introduced a few episodes back. Now she's finally moved in to the Baxter home, the comedy sparks are flying.
The writing is always good in this show, and Krista Yu is actually *funny*. Eve was a good character, as was Molly Ephraim's Mandy, but the new Mandy falls flat for me (so far), and Kristin is likeable but light on laughs. Jen brings great energy to a wider cast of funny characters, including Kyle, Ed, Chuck and even Ryan.
It feels like Jen represents a genuine foil to Mike, whose barbed character goes too far at times (the previous episode with Ryan being a good example. Kudos for bringing in a new 'daughter' who looks set to be a great addition.
Servant: Pigeon (2023)
Thought it would be a dream
So the bulk of this episode was Leanne being attacked by the cult, as she locks herself in the family car. All throughout the attack, I kept asking, "Where is EVERYONE else who lives on that street?" The car horn is blaring, hundreds of pigeons are descending on a mass of people attacking a car. For that reason, I thought we'd find Leanne was having a nightmare. But no, it seems it was supposed to be real.
There are some weird writing choices here. Last season, Leanne was increasingly confident of her considerable powers, even down to orchestrating the seemingly accidental death of Dorothy's colleague. Now, she's locked herself in a car, panicking at the mass of Lesser Saints who seem staggeringly incompetent.
'Servant' is a strange animal. It reveals very little, yet still manages to keep you watching. If you haven't give up on it by now, you know you're going to keep watching to the end.
The Orville: Identity, Part II (2019)
Predictable and tedious
Let's be honest. Was there ever any possibility that the Kaylon would successfully carry out their plan to exterminate all biological life on earth? Was there ever a possibility that Malloy and Grayson would fail to execute their plan? Was there ever any possibility that Isaac *wouldn't* end up turning and saving the day?
And this is the problem with The Orville. There are no surprises (other than that weird situation of Halston Sage leaving the show). Ironically, Finn talks about the virtue of cliches, which this episode is utterly laden with. Yes, there was an epic space battle, but it went on for an age and wasn't anything you haven't seen a hundred times before in the Star Wars or Marvel universe. And again, it's devoid of surprise. You just *know* the Kaylon will be defeated, and so they were.
I thought The Orville would be a comedy Star Trek, but it's really just another Star Trek. And to date, I still don't really understand the point of it?
The Orville: Deflectors (2019)
More relationship drama and liberal preaching
So many other reviewers have said it already. Why does a sci-fi show waste so much potential on banal relationship drama? I like Bortus, but mainly when he's quipping something innocently rude (like asking if it's mandatory to attend Ty's piano recital).
Seth, we get it. You passionately believe everyone should be able to do whatever makes them happy (so long as they're not hurting anyone else). We also get that you *really* dislike religion. *So* passionate are you in these beliefs, that you seem intent on hijacking an entire show to preach your message.
I don't care that Bortus and Klyden are a bad match. I couldn't give a fig about Kelly and Cassius. I have zero interest in the doctor's sexual relationship with a robot. What I'd really to see is some genuinely interesting sci-fi ideas explored, with compelling conflict and new characters in the spotlight for once.
This season has been a complete dud so far, especially since the lovely Alara was jettisoned for the thoroughly unlikeable replacement.
Overall, this has fast become a tedious experience.
Corner Gas Animated: Band Aid (2020)
Predictable
I'm not sure if there was supposed to be some mystery to the plot, but it was glaringly obvious from the start that Brent wrote the song about Lacey. Right from the mention of crinkle-cut fries! So the whole story of Lacey trying to find out who Brent's high school crush was seemed pointless.
Likewise, it was also obvious Oscar was only trying to raise money for himself, not the senior centre. No surprises there.
Corner Gas is always a great watch, so this isn't a *bad* episode. It's just pretty light on story. The antics of Face Chunks wasn't all that funny either. Felt like they were trying to fill the run time with this one.
Arrested Development: Public Relations (2004)
Absolutely hilarious
Love this episode, with several running jokes introduced here. The idea that Hollywood has-been Carl Weathers is perpetually on the take is wonderfully done, right down to him telling a news reporter he may need $50,000 in medical expenses, which clutching a foil takeaway swan. Then Buster demonstrating he is a master at being neither seen nor heard, blending into the wallpaper.
AD doesn't rely on lazy misunderstandings, but rather sets up a recurring comedy theme that is expertly woven into different strands. Each character is genuinely hilarious in their own way. Never has family dysfunction been so funny!
Amazing stuff.
Locke & Key: The Maze (2021)
More unnecessary choices
As other reviewers have said, bad character decisions really let this show down. Kinsey needs a plan to manage Gabe, and ends up acting incredibly sketchy around him. How about this? "Sorry Gabe. I thought I was over Scott, but he's the one I love. Let's take some time out for now." That would be a perfectly plausible get-out.
The problem is, any 'dilemma' in this show could easily be solved by a relatively simple alternative. There's no need for Jackie to remember magic. There's no need to tell anyone else about the keys. There's no need for Duncan to get his memories back. In fact, there's really no need for any of the major plot points. And so the whole thing becomes both tedious and repetitive.
Locke & Key: Forget Me Not (2021)
Dragging on . . .
Locke & Key is a show that looks good and isn't too badly acted. The problem is, it doesn't quite seem to know where it's going or why. Take Tyler, for example. He's got a lovely girlfriend, but she's about to turn 18 and is already starting to lose her memory of magic. But so what? Why does he even need to use the keys?
Gabe and Eden are still trying to make a key, though it isn't at all clear why the very powerful Gabe even needs a partner.
And Duncan's memory issue. He gets a headache, then gets angry, then needs a lie down. Repeat 3-4 times.
It's all very repetitive and makes little sense. There's a whole bunch of high school romantic drama thrown in, which seems an odd distraction given how seismic the supernatural challenges are.
I'm only watching still because it's got a finite end in sight. But it's really quite a tedious show.
Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part III (2022)
Wow, this show is really terrible!
You can read the other reviews to discover all the plot points that make no sense. I'm just astonished that something as venerated as Star Wars could ever become *so* bad. The pace is slow, McGregor's acting is poor (perhaps due to a lousy script), and there isn't a single character worth caring about. I mean we already know Leia, Luke and Obi-Wan survive, so where exactly is the tension?
The concept - finding out what happened to Obi-Wan before Episode IV - was quite promising. I just can't figure out how they've made the story and its execution so bad.
Even my two daughters - who are easily entertained - can't *stand* Reva. They think she's annoying and cringey, yet not in the least bit frightening.
Sorry Disney. You've really dropped the ball on this show, and I have no idea how that happened.
Obi-Wan Kenobi: Part I (2022)
How on earth did they manage to make Star Wars boring?
The Mandalorian was pretty solid, and had some knockout episodes. The Book Of Boba Fett was dull as dishwater. Now we have Obi-Wan, which - judging by episode 1 - is going to follow the same style of story-telling as Boba Fett. My goodness, it's boring! Aside from an opening sequence involving blasters and lightsabres, the rest of this episode moved at the same pace as that CGI camel Obi-Wan rides.
If they'd condensed the story into 30 minutes, it might have been engaging; instead, it was tediously paced, poorly choreographed and badly acted. Worse still, McGregor infuses Obi-Wan with the same stilted, wooden, charisma-vacuum that he perfected in the prequels.
Star Wars is supposed to be a character-driven thrill ride, but the showrunners seem dedicated to making this new phase light on plot and even lighter on action. How this episode scored 8/10 is a mystery.
Better Call Saul: Plan and Execution (2022)
Step back, and it's a pretty weak end of Part 1
A lot of fans claim Better Call Saul is superior to Breaking Bad, but here's the fundamental problem with the former: it simply isn't driven by the same high stakes as BB. Walter White, dying of incurable cancer, sets out to make quick dollar in the meth game. But one critical dilemma after another gets him in so deep, his entire character undergoes a frightening metamorphosis.
Not so for Saul Goodman who, despite his impressive talents, will always be a carnival conman (albeit with a truckload of cash). Worse still, Kim Wexler's breaking bad trajectory makes little to no sense, other than a weird sexual fetish that never quite rings true.
The long con with Howard was intriguing, but it was also incredibly petty and downright mean-spirited. It was a game, and little more. A much more compelling con was the one on Chuck. For starters, Jimmy had believable motivation. Kim won Mesa Verde and Chuck tried to do her over. So Jimmy pulled an impressive con, outsmarting his genius brother and all for the woman he loved.
The Howard con was essentially a repeat of the one on Chuck - make the mark seem paranoid and absurd, then slam dunk with a career-maiming act of humiliation. The courtroom showdown between Jimmy and Chuck was one of the best ever done, but Howard's end stretched all plausibility. Cliff Main seems unimaginably gullible, believing Howard to be a crack addict getting down with a series of prostitutes? The caffeine ingestion gig didn't ring true, and the whole boardroom collapse scene over-egged.
And then there was Howard's 'exit'. Somewhat shocking, yes. But Howard was never a character with skin in the game. So why invest so much time on him?
Arguably, the most compelling strand of the show (post-Chuck) was Nacho, a man who faced truly impossible choices with stakes at a Walter White level. It made fantastic television, except this is Saul's show, not Nacho's.
BCS is still one of the finest shows I've ever seen, not least for its stunning cinematography. But it will need to pull a major rabbit out of the hat to match the perfection of Breaking Bad.
Secrets of Sulphur Springs (2021)
Bad writing or bad acting?
This is a plot-driven show, so I'm really not sure if some of the shoddiness is down to bad writing or bad acting.
The kids are generally okay: Griffin and Harper are the most competent, and Savannah's acting has dramatically improved since S1. But the replacement actor for Topher is *toe-curlingly* bad. I mean seriously awful. It's as if they needed to find a new actor whose sole qualification was to look as much like the first guy as possible.
In any event, the entire show is instantly forgettable, though immediately watchable.
Stranger Things: Chapter Eight: The Battle of Starcourt (2019)
Season 3: Just . . . a mess
Season 3 is a classic example of a series that has been written by formula. It's as if they held a focus group and asked fans what they liked most about the show. Then they wrote a new season and randomly chucked in all 'the good bits'. The result is an incoherent mess which oddly still *just about* manages to be watchable. Hence my 5 / 10 star rating.
Where to start with the critique? I'll try to keep this brief, as so many fans have already had their say.
* The teen soap opera vibe, which now renders the entire child cast as distinctly unlikeable. Max, in particular, is a scowling, snappy stirrer and Lucas is way better off without her.
* Too many characters. Elle, Mike, Will, Lucas, Max, Dustin, Steve, Robin, Joyce, Hopper, Nancy, Jonathan, Billy, Murray, comical Russian scientist and . . . Erica. Sorry, but the best screenwriters in the world couldn't keep this number of characters interesting. Will and Lucas, in particular, are largely sidelined in this season. Even Mike has little to do, except prattle on about how much Elle means to him.
* The inexplicable decision to split the core gang up. Season 1 was tight and focused - this time around, they've scattered the characters far and wide and it shows. Why is Dustin best buddies with Steve?!
* Homages have now become rip-offs. Russian Terminator was an utter joke - this is a not a loving nod to an eighties classic, but a cheap running sight gag.
* Plausibility stretched to breaking point. First prize goes to the sprawling Russian base built underneath a shopping mall, complete with utterly inept Russian goons.
* The ill-judged mash-up of slapstick comedy and eye-watering gore. Light comedy moments to punctuate eerie suspense is one thing, but S3 piles on ridiculous, over-the-top performances in an attempt to be overtly funny. As much as I like Murray, he went too far, as did the Russian scientist hostage, who loves cherry slurpies and Woody Woodpecker cartoons.
* Violence and swearing. The kids were swearing a lot more in S2; it's even worse in S3 - swearing because it's cool, right? In fact, the younger the child, the cooler it is when they swear. As for the violence, there are some truly brutal moments in this, which should make it much closer to an 18 than a 15.
* Erica. Sorry, but she deserves a bullet-point all of her own. She was utterly awful, and the very last person the 'Scoops Troop' would have co-opted for their plan. She wasn't just precocious; she was downright appalling.
* Back-slapping their culturally-hip and 'hilarious' dialogue. Dustin and Erica's tete-a-tete about nerds and My Little Pony? Murray calling out Joyce and Hopper for their 'sexual tension'?
* Far too many tropes and cliches. It is now par for the course that a beastie will thunder down a corridor towards its victim, then slow right down before the kill. Because, you know, it's 'tense'. And then - GASP! - someone saves the day at the last second. Repeat ad infinitum.
* Never-Ending Story. This was single-handedly one of the *worst* moments in television. Susie-Poo, who served no plot purpose whatsoever, suddenly appears at the end and insists that Dustin does a Never-Ending Story duet with her. And Dustin, reluctant at first, quickly finds his mojo and enjoys himself, despite the fact that his delay could literally mean the end of the world.
* Robin's 'reveal'. Were the writers being 'woke'? No, I genuinely don't believe they were. Otherwise, they'd have made her sexuality a dominant strand through the whole season. Instead, after building up romantic tension between her and Steve - tension in which it was clear she was in love with him - they decided to throw in a 'twist'. Hey, it turns out Robin likes girls - gotcha!
By the end of it all, I genuinely didn't care who lived or died, and that's a long fall from the genuine genius of Season 1. Elle, Steve and Robin were just about the only likeable characters in this sorry mess. Where did it all go so wrong?
I'm thankful to all those who have posted reviews here on IMDb, and hope the Duffers pore over these critiques. They have the opportunity to recapture the magic of Season 1 for Season 4. Don't blow it, chaps. Otherwise, we might just need to close the gate on you.
Stranger Things: Chapter One: Suzie, Do You Copy? (2019)
Thrilling sci-fi or teen love drama?
Like many reviewers, I was rather bemused by the extensive theme of love / lust in this opening episode. Of course, human relationships have always been a stellar part of Stranger Things but here we see almost every major character exploring romance. Mike and Elle just want to make out (which is unpleasant to see), Lucas and Max have something of a fiery relationship (though mercifully light on snogging), Steve is relentlessly hitting on every female customer, though it seems fairly evident he'll end up with his attractive co-worker. Even Hopper seems to have the hots for Joyce now.
The worst part of all this lovey-dovey time-wasting is Bad Boy Billy, trying to seduce Mrs Wheeler. When he first appeared in Season 2, he looked (and still does) like he'd wandered off the set of The Lost Boys. That gave him a truly mysterious edge, as if there really was something vampiric about him. But now . . . well, no spoilers, but it feels so wasted to pitch him as a ludicrous, bronzed teen lothario.
This show is 'Stranger Things', yet there's very little in the way of strange as we enter the third installment. Let's hope episode one was a forgiveable blip . . .
Monk: Mr. Monk Gets Fired (2004)
Makes no sense
So the killer needed the Commissioner's toupe, because it was made from the hair of the murder victim. And...? The victim sold her hair a month before she was murdered in the killer's garage. So how does the toupe in any way implicate the killer, especially since they found no trace evidence anywhere at the alleged crimes scene? Even if they could source DNA from it, there is zero link to the actual murder.
The show is always funny, but the plots often make little sense.
Monk: Mr. Monk Goes to the Theater (2003)
Funny, but completely stupid
It's wise to remember that Monk is a comedy first, and a detective mystery second. Keep that in mind and you'll be able to overlook some major plot problems in this and other episodes. For example, how does the fake knife, with retractable blade, stay in the victim's chest? How does the victim have a major allergic reaction at the precise moment he's 'stabbed'? Why does a gorgeous murderer waste time at a speed dating event, days after committing a serious crime?
The answer to all these questions is 'because of lazy writing', yet Tony Shalhoub injects such a strong dose of character comedy, you can forgive the illogicalities. Yes, his turn at speed dating is hilarious, but so is his request for a $4 bribe refund.
All in all, it's a thoroughly stupid episode but if you like Monk, you'll like this one.
Swamp Thing (2019)
Fantastic show
Extremely impressed by the production values on this sadly-cancelled show. The cinematography is stunning, visual effects top notch and the acting very good. Plot-wise, there is a strong ecology theme, with 'nature fighting back'. The show also explores the idea of identity, as we explore who Swamp Thing really is.
Though cancelled, this is well worth watching all the way through, as it wraps up (albeit with the clear option to continue the story).
Crooked House (2017)
One of the blandest murder mysteries I've ever seen
The problem with Crooked House, as other reviewers have said, is that it's just so functional and pedestrian, with absolutely no visual flare. It runs with a functional unravelling of plot, rather than an immersive and atmospheric experience like And Then There Were None. Story-wise, it's is a lot like Rian Johnson's Knives Out, which was executed (excuse the pun) with way more verve.
Crooked House feels like a standard episode of Poirot (without Poirot, of course), with a bland leading man. Max Irons can act, but he can't truly captivate. The ending feels weirdly abrupt, with no epilogue to bring the character's story to a close. The stellar cast members - Close, Anderson, Stamp - are sidelined to supporting roles and it hardly seems worth their while being in it.
If you want a cracking murder mystery, Knives Out is one of the finest. If you're an Agatha Christie hound, And Then There Were None is hard to beat. Crooked House is such an uninspiring affair, you really won't care who the killer is by the end.
R.L. Stine's The Haunting Hour: A Creature Was Stirring (2010)
Awful
Generally, The Haunting Hour is a significant improvement on the Goosebumps series from the 90s. Better production values and acting all round. This episode, however, is absolutely atrocious. The youngest child simply cannot act, the 'creature' is an appallingly unconvincing puppet and the pay-off ridiculous. Basically, a warring family (including soon-to-be-divorced parents) are magically united in love after about 30 minutes trapped at the mercy of a rubbish puppet . . . er, sorry, 'terrifying gremlin'.
There is nothing commendable about this episode that warrants anything higher than 1 star. Truly dreadful.