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tiffanie_says_stay_in_your_lane
Female
Millennial
Received a Bachelor of Science in Psychology, and a Master of Science in Health Science, with a dual concentration in Community Health and School Health Education.
Currently working as a crisis counselor.
I just watch movies and TV shows to relax, escape, laugh, feel inspired, etc. Whatever I'm in the mood for at the time. I don't like chick flicks, rom coms, Hallmark films, or anything else that's geared towards women. I love suspense, noir, adventure, mysteries, thrillers, and espionage. I'm a huge fan of movies from the Golden Age. I also primarily watch vintage TV shows.
Other things I love besides films: music, fashion, museums, iced coffee, yoga, sleeping, reading, volunteering, painting, and writing.
Reviews
Visions... (1972)
Impressive made-for-TV thriller that will have you in suspense!
When I read Visions of Death's synopsis, I thought it sounded fascinating. I knew I was gonna like it, but I was blown away, quite honestly. I agree with the reviewer who said it's kick-a**. I know it sounds lame to say that of a movie from the early 70s, but trust me, the action is a thousand times better than what's coming out nowadays. Contemporary films just go overboard with violence. I really do believe less is more, and this film exemplifies that, as do other thrillers and crime dramas from several decades ago. This has a solid story. Monte Markham was perfectly cast as Denver college professor Mark Lowell, a clairvoyant who has spent all of his life not telling anyone about his psychic abilities, including his girlfriend (Barbara Anderson). His predictions had always been harmless, but one day as he's going to his class, he starts having indiscernible visions of a man walking around what looks like an abandoned factory. He can't see his face, but he's able to see that he's planting a bomb (it's later revealed to be Joseph Sirola, who I recognized from an episode of The Untouchables). The visions are intrusive, so much to the point of disrupting his instruction, causing his students to notice that he's behaving oddly. Figuring the safety of the public is more important than trying to keep his clairvoyance a secret, he goes to the police department to tell them what he saw. A short time later a building actually explodes, and he's pegged as a suspect by Lt. Phil Keegan (Telly Savalas). He automatically labels him as psychotic, even going so far as to have Mark take tests for 24 hours straight, trying to push him to the brink of exhaustion, so he can make mistakes and prove his theory that he's deranged. As the movie progresses, he helps the police locate the bomber, leading Keegan to realize he had misjudged him. What a foreign concept to so many people - not making assumptions about a person before getting to know them. We can really use more films like this. The acting and pacing of the story were all top-notch. It was highly intriguing to be of the made-for-TV variety. Just like the movie that came out before, Thief, it rivals mainstream, box office hits.
Frozen with Fear (2001)
You'll be surprised by the quality!
***Slight Spoiler***
I don't understand the negative review. I guess some people might see Frozen with Fear as a basic chick flick, but it's actually a deep film that examines the complexities of marriage, trust, love, and mental illness. I thought agoraphobia was portrayed with both sensitivity and accuracy. This was also my first time watching Bo Derek. I knew she was famous for the iconic beach scene from the movie 10, sporting cornrows (huh, cultural appropriation, much? That's a whole other issue - not gonna go into it here). I'm often skeptical of models turned actors, but I really have to say, her performance in this film was quite brilliant and powerful. Her character, Katherine Sullivan, has been terrified to leave her house for the last few years. She has a beautiful home, with an indoor pool and sauna, so she's definitely living in the lap of luxury (I mean, if I had to be stuck in a house, that's the one I would choose). But her life is very depressing and lonely, even more so that her husband is having affairs, which she has awareness of. Her feeling of security is shattered when she witnesses his murder.
There is some predictability to the storyline. Detective Jack Mize (Stephen Shellen) has been assigned to Katherine's case shortly after his girlfriend dumps him. Newly single, he has dinner at her house, in front of a burning fireplace. And then she coaxes him to join her in the pool. So they have sex - as if you don't see that coming. They're 2 of the most polar opposite people. He's a goofy-looking guy with sideburns, and she's a rich, well-dressed stock trader. He was previously a lawyer, which goes to show you shouldn't judge people by their appearance. As the film progresses, their relationship is put to the test when he gets angry over something he finds out about her. The reason she's afraid to leave her house is heartbreaking. I won't share it here, because I've already given away a spoiler, although it's not a big deal. The male detectives usually sleep with their female clients in these types of films. What I will say is, the reason she developed agoraphobia is an integral component to the story, as it relates to her husband's double life. Overall, I thought Frozen with Fear was exceptional, and I'd watch it again. I love movies where women who were in the clutches of apprehension and self-doubt gradually find the courage to be strong. My expectations were high, and I wasn't disappointed. You won't be either. Please watch this and draw your own conclusion.
My Strange Addiction (2010)
Is this even real???
It's gotta be fake. People eating glass, mattresses, cigarette ashes, plastic. A woman who drinks household cleaner... Another drinking gasoline?! She actually walks around with the can. It doesn't make any sense. On the back of cleaning products it says "CAUTION: HARMFUL IF SWALLOWED. DO NOT ingest. Avoid contact with skin, eyes, mucous membranes and clothing." If someone drinks bleach, Windex, etc., poison control should be called the second after it happens. And drinking gasoline can lead to death from circulatory failure. So it's not humanly possible for anyone on this show to be alive. I try to avoid making conclusions about things without doing research, but I'm convinced this is staged. The interactions the person has with their family and friends even come off as scripted. They'll put anything on TV. It's not like they're highlighting any specific mental disorder. It's completely unrealistic. People who drink chemicals are trying to attempt suicide - they're not doing it for pleasure. That is so absurd, which is why this just seems like it was all done as a joke. Good thing it's on YouTube. I would feel awfully dumb if I was paying to watch this garbage.
Hoarders (2009)
Easily addictive, but does get old after several episodes
I found myself binging this over the last few days, since the episodes were free on YouTube. I'm in agreement with one of the reviewers: it is hard to look away from this show, even knowing how revolting and depressing it is. I had liked Hoarders over the last 4 or 5 years for some reason. I guess it's because I'm somewhat of a hoarder myself. I'm not disgusting, but also not a clean freak either. My bedroom has gotten cluttered due to the accumulation of papers from school and work. I also get tempted to buy clothes I don't need. But I would never let junk consume my space to the extent that these people do. I didn't see this mentioned in any other reviews, so I thought I'd bring attention to it - the houses you see on this show aren't just filled with clothing and other knick-knacks. Many of them have roaches... Floors that are covered in mouse and rat droppings... Dog feces and pee stains everywhere... Mold growing on food in refrigerators. So just as a warning, it can be really gross, and maybe even difficult to watch. What's even sadder is how some of these people led normal lives and were able to maintain a clean house. They experienced something traumatic, leading them to snap in a sense. They lost motivation just to do something as simple as toss a paper cup in the trash after finishing their beverage.
Is this exploitative? Eh, yeah, kind of. It does bring attention to a mental disorder - compulsive hoarding - that otherwise wasn't being widely discussed, so that's a positive. Nonetheless, people's issues are still being put on display for complete strangers to judge them. I also sometimes don't agree with how the therapists administer the interventions. I'm a counselor on a crisis hotline, so I'm not licensed, but I feel like the therapists don't always handle the hoarders' situations properly. For example, a woman who was obsessed with Christmas and body products, so the house was filled with mountains of decorations and bottles of lotion. Her husband was a diabetic, and when he got up to use the bathroom one night, he stubbed his toe from climbing over her junk to get to the toilet. The smallest injury could've put him at risk of developing gangrene, leading to removal of a limb. It was obvious she didn't care about his health. On one of the days that the cleaning crew was working on decluttering, he just lost it - he got really stressed out, and was shaking. He started flinging stuff around out of frustration, and the therapist was like okay, let's stop throwing things. I thought it was invalidating of her to tell him that, seeing as how he had been dealing with maneuvering around her crap for years. I think it's important for people to express anger, especially if their life has been miserable because of someone else. It's not like he was reacting in such a way that he was putting himself or other people in danger. He had reached a point where he just couldn't take it anymore, and that was understandable. I can't help but wonder if this is staged, considering even with a poor therapist, the person is able to get their house clean and reclaim their happiness. Compulsive hoarding has a high likelihood of relapse, so it doesn't seem believable they were able to improve their living environment after receiving subpar therapy. By the 4th or 5th episode, it starts to get tiresome. Most of the houses are so filthy to the point that it's disturbing.
Absolutely Fabulous (1992)
Misleading title. More like "Absolutely Dreadful"
I always heard Absolutely Fabulous was funny, so when I saw it was coming on PBS Saturday nights, I wanted to check it out - see if it delivered according to the praise it receives. I did laugh the first time, and quite honestly, I felt bad, because the jokes are so offensive. The more I watched this, I found that I wasn't amused. It stops being funny when you realize these characters have serious mental and emotional issues. It's nothing else besides 2 narcissistic women - Edina "Eddie" Monsoon (Jennifer Saunders) and Patsy Stone (Joanna Lumley) - talking nonsense for a half an hour. They live in London/Holland Park, and are still stuck in the Swinging 60s. Despite abusing drugs and alcohol, Eddie has managed to build a successful career in public relations. She's slightly overweight, and doesn't know how to wear outfits that complement her figure. She wears large clothing, making her look even less flattering, and not to mention ridiculous. Patsy is a former model and fashion director. She abuses substances more excessively in comparison to Eddie, almost overdosing several times, including needing to have her stomach pumped one of the times after using rave drugs. They have this bizarre, codependent friendship going on. They've known each other since childhood, and although they're not involved romantically, they've spent most of their life together. Eddie is twice divorced. Her long-suffering daughter, Saffron (Julia Sawalha), from her second marriage (which ended due to her ex-husband revealing he was gay) lives with them. Patsy is verbally and physically abusive towards her, using her hair as an ashtray, and she once tied her to a traffic light. Someone please tell me, where is the joke? Why would a person allow someone to treat their child so poorly? I think it's concerning something this inane stayed on for 20 years. That doesn't say much about the collective IQ of human society. I laugh at some pretty dumb things, and I can't even find anything humorous about this show. It glamorizes drug addiction and alcoholism. Maybe it would have the potential to be entertaining if Eddie wasn't a mom. I think what solidified it's not funny is the episode "Birth," when Saffron breaks down in tears as Eddie is trying to teach her how to get a boyfriend. It's impossible not to feel sorry for her. I know it's pretend, but you have to stop and ask yourself, how much of this is actually grounded in fantasy? Some kids do have parents who stay out all night drinking or going on a drug binge, leaving them to feel unwanted and scared. She basically had to raise herself because Eddie was drunk all of the time. I don't even have kids, and I think it's disturbing how the writers tried to make it seem like that wasn't a big deal. She had a son from her first marriage, and living with her caused him to struggle so much, that he left the country. Parody or satire aside - it's a hot mess. I do think it's nice how the episodes revolved around a variety of topics, as TV shows that are geared towards women don't focus on anything else besides relationships, but watching Eddie and Patsy act belligerent and selfish gets old quick. If you're into the party scene, and you sleep around, don't even have kids, because you would just be bringing them into a dysfunctional environment, and that's not fair to them. What an empty show.
Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (1989)
It's just okay. More enjoyable for kids than adults
I remember this being one of the movies I used to watch over and over again when I was a kid. But its entertainment factor is just gone now, at least for me anyway. I saw it on television last night, and didn't enjoy it like I used to. I thought it was groan-inducing. There's actually a lot of movies from my childhood that I don't like anymore. I think my film preference has changed because I've gotten older. And when you become an adult, you notice things that you were unaware of as a kid, and that does take the fun out of watching a children's movie. It has the typical setup of a suburban comedy: women are the voice of reason, while all of the men act like idiots. Not saying women aren't intelligent, but the characters are so heavily stereotyped. Rick Moranis (Wayne Szalinski) plays a nerd and workaholic father/husband. He's so obsessed with his scientific projects, that his wife Diane (Marcia Strassman) leaves to spend the night at her mother's house, causing one of their kids, Nick, to worry that they're going to get a divorce, and he's assured by his teenage sister, Amy, that she'll return home. I didn't even catch what that was intended to mean when I was a kid, how she needed a break from him. I also didn't notice how irritating their next door neighbor was. They're a couple with 2 sons, the older one being Amy's crush. The wife (Kristie Sutherland) was friendly, but the husband (Chris Frewer) was so opinionated and loud. The machine Wayne is working on eventually shrinks both his and their kids. I won't even go into it more, because it's all predictable. Unless you're one of those millennials who's really nostalgic for 80s and 90s movies, this might be boring for you.
Thief (1971)
Better than a lot of box office films
Wow, movies of this caliber used to come on regular television??? Who would've thought a few decades later this would be the same network to have a show where women cry over men that they've only known for 10 minutes. TV has definitely gotten dumbed down. I don't think a lot of people nowadays have the attention span long enough to watch a movie that doesn't contain a load of cussing and sex. That personally turns me off, so I love finding these vintage movies on YouTube. I'm finally done with Lifetime movies. I got so tired of watching people argue with their family. I wanted to go back to watching the movies that I used to enjoy: films that are truly suspenseful and explore the human condition. Thief is proof of why a small budget doesn't mean poor quality. This is the most well-acted made for TV film I've seen in a LONG while. I'm not exaggerating - I've been watching a lot of them, and this is the first one that wasn't crap for a change.
I don't usually like movies or TV shows where the main character steals as a living, but I found myself enjoying this story about an LA burglar and jewel thief, and even feeling sorry for him. Neil Wilkerson (Richard Crenna) wants to go straight - his motivations being his girlfriend (Angie Dickinson), and trying to obtain custody of his son. He's living on the east coast with his ex, who's an alcoholic. He finds himself having to pull off a heist one last time to pay off a gambling debt. The only complaint I have is the ending. It didn't make any sense, and it was disappointing. Otherwise, Richard Crenna's performance was heartfelt as a father who wanted to be with his son, as a man who was giving serious consideration to becoming a husband, and as a criminal who was being pulled into a life that he was striving to escape. This has been added to my list of movies to watch more than once.
Perfect Plan (2010)
Didn't meet expectations, but hey, what else is new?
Here we go: a Lifetime movie that left me feeling unsatisfied, and quite honestly, mad. It's become a pattern. I really wasn't expecting to be disappointed, because the storyline of this film did sound intriguing: Chicago realtor Lauren (Emily Rose) is unfortunately trying to make sales in a housing market that couldn't be any more dismal. In fact, the lack of buyers results in so much boredom at work, that her colleague spends most of her time reading romance novels. One day a man named Sean Crawford (Lucas Bryant) enters the office, and offers to buy a mansion that's located on the Gold Coast. As the film progresses, she discovers that the sellers were murdered, and the owners are scam artists, which leads her to being used to mask the crime. I love stories that have drastic turn of events, but this turned out to be nothing like what I thought it would. I've noticed the characters in these movies get themselves into dangerous situations because of their own stupidity. All of that could've been avoided if she didn't do business with him after he inquired if she wanted to have sex with him. Okay, that wasn't his first question - he asked if she would like to go out for dinner. She tells him she has a boyfriend, and they live together. But he doesn't stop with the romantic advances. He actually has the nerve to say 'so you would consider sleeping with me to get the listing?' To which she replies 'I mean I might, would it work?' She does decline his offer, but then he leaves flowers on her desk the next day, and she has a positive reaction. That's when I turned the movie off. How rude of him to request something like that, and then she wasn't the slightest bit offended. I would've been like I know you did not just ask me that. Plus the guy looked all sinister, and she was getting excited over him surprising her with flowers? That is such bs! I could tell this movie was written by a man. It makes women look desperate and stupid. If you're a woman, and you're propositioned for sex in exchange for something by a person on your job - coworker, client, or customer - please report them! That's sexual harassment and it shouldn't be tolerated. Shame on the filmmakers for trying to make it seem like that's acceptable. I'm done with Lifetime movies. The majority of them are garbage.
The Ultimate Lie (1996)
So tedious. And the character who's not even the main focus is actually the one who's unlikable
I don't even know why I bother with these movies. I'm just looking for something engaging to watch, because TV is so boring. Out of all the Lifetime movies that are posted on YouTube, why is it so hard to find at least one that's not such a buzzkill? Esteemed law professor Malcolm McGrath (Michael Murphy) is on track to receiving the position of chancellor. His 19-year-old daughter Claire (Kristin Davis) has flunked out of college and moved back home, living in the guesthouse in the backyard. They're both harboring a secret: he's cheating on his wife (Blair Brown) with call girls, and she's working as a prostitute for affluent clients. When she ends up going to his hotel room one night, she makes it her mission to cause dysfunction in the household. There's an awkward scene where she's trying to be an instigator at one of her parent's lavish dinner parties by announcing to the whole room that she was going to tell a raunchy joke about a man who had an extramarital affair, despite all of their guests looking uncomfortable, with the intention of embarrassing/ratting him out in front of everybody. The way I read the synopsis, of him encountering a prostitute who turns out to be his daughter, is that she was his long-lost daughter. But for it to end up being the one who he already knew existed, I mean... Where's the suspense? I was expecting to watch something that was unpredictable to a certain degree. How disappointing.
Also, who was meant to be the center of the story? I found myself more focused on Claire's bratty behavior. I'm guessing the filmmakers wanted to portray her as the victim in the situation, and that might've been believable if she was a child, but her age, and personality, made it very hard to like her. Not too many people have parents who let them live at home as an adult rent free, unemployed, and not going to school. Well, she did have a job, but she really wasn't doing anything constructive. It's like she was taking advantage of her family being rich. And not to mention patient, because if she was living under my roof, she would've been packing her bags after her inappropriate behavior at the party. She reminds me of this girl I used to work with, who was around the same age and living at home. Her parents were having the same issue, and she told us about her father, to make it seem like he was awful. I didn't feel sorry for her, honestly. I thought to myself why are you all up in their business anyway??? If a person has their own life, even if they do live at home, they won't even know what's going on in their parent's marriage. People like that come off as spoiled to me. A movie loses its entertainment factor when a character reminds you of someone from your own life, especially if they were obnoxious. If that was me, I would move out after discovering one parent was cheating on the other. There's no way I'd wanna be caught in the middle of that drama.
Claire eventually tells her mom that Malcolm is cheating, and she gets enraged, thinking it was just an unsubstantiated accusation that was stemming from her childishness. Not like it was surprising she wasn't believed. If she hadn't of acted disrespectful, she might've been taken seriously. You're not all that credible when your judgment is lacking. Overall, this film is a chore to get through. No one evokes sympathy, or is relatable. Claire ended up being even more unlikeable than Malcolm. I think having her turn out to be one of her dad's clients was just stupid. Plus, technically the word lie should be plural in the title, because Malcolm wasn't the only one who was being dishonest - Claire wasn't telling the complete truth. They were both living a double life. I try not to give away spoilers, but some movies are so bad, that I don't see the point in telling people to watch for themselves. Please skip this. It's too depressing.
Shameful Secrets (1993)
Second Lifetime film I couldn't finish
I'm trying to limit my intake of Lifetime movies, if not stop watching them altogether. I haven't been counting, but I've seen over 5 now. Out of all of them, I only found a couple that I enjoyed. Most of them are trash. Ridiculous plotlines and laughable acting, even when the film revolved around a serious topic. I guess for people who don't get out much, they teach "lessons." But as for me, I often feel like they're a waste of my time. However, there were some films that I just couldn't finish watching, no matter how much I tried. Not because they were crappy, but more or less disturbing. It's not very often that a movie makes me mad... Like to the point of my heart racing. Anything not real that makes me feel like that, I don't consider to be entertaining. Tim Matheson gave such a believable performance as the evil, wife-beating husband, Daniel, of Joanna Kerns (Maryanne), that I wanted to jump through the screen and try to fight him, since she was too scared to do it. He beats her relentlessly in front of their 2 kids, even hitting her when she was holding one of them. And that's when I couldn't take it anymore, so I stopped watching. I hate to see kids suffering. I can watch stuff that contains all sorts of violence, and not be bothered, but I have a low tolerance for watching kids get harmed. Some people just allow too much dysfunction in their house. At what point was she going to leave him? If he didn't have a problem terrifying his own children, he had been abusive for years. That didn't start happening out of nowhere. I know movies can ignite all kinds of emotions within us, and that's not something we should run away from, because we're human. Nonetheless, I personally don't like to get stressed out when I watch a film. I plan on never revisiting this again.
The Sweetheart (2018)
Too awful to even finish
This movie is disgusting. Not in an ew gross kind of way, but morally reprehensible. I think it's crazy how some women will bring a man who they've only been dating for a short amount of time into their home when they have kids. The guy could be a pervert, on drugs, have a criminal record - anything. There's no other explanation for someone putting their feelings over their children's safety other than selfishness. The Sweetheart (or the alternate title, Dating a Sociopath. That's an outdated term, by the way) was such a pain to get through that I didn't even watch it to the end. But I watched a large enough portion of it to know that I had wasted too much of my time. It's absolute garbage.
Samantha and Paul (Jessalyn Gilsig and Scott Gibson) are a married couple living in a beautiful house, and both driving luxury cars, but their life is far from a fairytale. They're always fighting. One night when he picks up their teenage daughter, Jane (Hannah Vandenbygaarl), from hanging out with a friend, his cell phone rings, he answers it, but of course he's not paying attention, leading him to run a red light and a stop sign. Unfortunately, when he goes through the stop sign another car hits them on the passenger side. Jane is badly injured, and needs physical therapy. Her life starts going downhill when she comes home from the hospital to discover her dad has moved out. She has a close relationship with him, so she's understandably sad and confused. It doesn't help that her mom keeps springing one unpleasant surprise on her after another. She introduces Jane to her personal trainer, Brain (Jon Cor). Not long after, he starts occupying their living space, eventually sleeping with her mom. Meanwhile, her dad is living in a hotel and drinking every day. The film really starts to get disturbing when Brian switches Jane's pain medication with a placebo while she's sleeping, then puts the real ones back later on. He kept a Ziploc bag of prescriptions in his car. He also orders her an alcoholic drink when they go out for lunch, all her mom's idea. Somehow, he convinced the server that she was 21. I should've stopped watching then. She develops an addiction to her meds, and her health is even worsened by having mixed them with alcohol. She's feeling so out of sorts, that she has difficulty taking her college entrance exam. When Jane and her friend take it upon themselves to do their own detective work, that's when I turned it off. Her mom was getting romantic with another man, while still married to her father. They were just separated. It got on my nerves so much, that I didn't even care to know how it ended.
This movie is proof of why I don't think women should always be given custody of their kids in divorce cases (yes, I'm a woman who feels this way). There are some who put their kids in danger. I know the couple in the story wasn't divorced, but it was a similar situation. Jane and her little sister would've been safer with their dad than their mom. Dumb is an understatement for Samantha. You're married to a man who loves both you and his kids, but yet, you're going to stress him out so bad that he goes to live somewhere else. And then on top of that, getting angry when he comes around, as well as letting another man move in, who you really don't know, and you have 2 daughters? That's exactly why the film was annoying me. So is this realistic? Well, yes and no. People do stupid stuff like this all of the time. But, due to it being a product of Lifetime, it's overexaggerated. There was just too much conflict for me, and all of it was caused by Samantha. Jane's addiction wouldn't have even started if she hadn't allowed that freak to get so comfortable in their house. My recommendation, is to avoid. This is one of those Lifetime movies that will make you mad.
The Boy She Met Online (2010)
Typical Lifetime tripe - characters doing stupid things
I have mixed feelings about this movie. The Boy She Met Online does convey an important message: how parents need to monitor what their kids are doing online. As I once heard someone say, when I was watching a webinar - the internet wasn't designed for children. They don't have the mental capacity to decipher between who's safe to be talking to, and who they should leave alone. That's why they need their parents to teach them what red flags to look out for. Keep in mind, however, that I am generalizing, because there are some kids, specifically teens, who are more intelligent than others. Which is where my mixed feelings come into play. I found myself annoyed with the main character, 17-year-old Cami (Tracy Spiridakos), a very naive girl who lives in a small Pennsylvania town (at least, going off of the information from the dialogue, that sounded like it was the setting of the film). She turns into a sneak after talking to this guy online named Jake (Jon Cor). She know he's 23. What she doesn't know, is he's sending her messages from a computer in jail. She thinks he's a student at Penn State. When they talk to each other on the phone, the prisoners are cheering at a TV in the background. She asks him about the noise, and he says he's at a bar off campus.
Her behavior becomes increasingly outrageous the more she talks to him. Getting into trouble for texting in class, skipping school to go shopping at the mall, constantly lying to her mom about where she was going every time she left the house to meet up with him once he got out of jail. Even dismissing her friend when she started showing concern for her lack of sanity. If I'm being honest, she got on my nerves. I found her cluelessness to be so irritating. I was also 17 the year this was filmed, and I was NOT anywhere near this dumb! I mean don't get me wrong, I didn't always use common sense, but I knew it wouldn't be a sensible choice to start a relationship with an adult man. I wasn't that desperate for attention. I do understand the allure that older guys have to some teenage girls. They can seem more interesting to converse with, more worldly, and more attractive compared to boys their age. All of that aside, dating can pose a risk. An older guy is likely to have a checkered past, and might hide things about himself. It was kind of disheartening to watch her be so obsessed with someone who was a lowlife. A guy who Jake sometimes clashed with when he was in jail had also got out, and at one point, when the 3 of them are sitting in the coffeeshop where she works, and Jake mentions going to New York, she's like oh cool, we could get an apartment together! And I'm like... Why would she wanna share an apartment with a couple of dudes, in NYC? So they could invite their friends over, and then she would be the only female surrounded by a bunch of men drinking, smoking, and doing who knows what else. She's extremely sheltered. Over time, she finds herself caught in the middle of Jake's dangerous lifestyle. When all of this is going on, her mom is out of the loop, and doesn't discover who Jake is until she calls his number on Cami's cell phone and he answers by basically saying "uh-huh, I knew you would call, sex is addictive!" That was just poor parenting. Forget taking the phone. She should've taken all of the technology. Some teens aren't mature enough to have a computer in their room.
Unsurprisingly, the acting leaves a lot to be desired. Jake's jail mate/friend is injured from being whacked in the head by a person who broke into the house. Him and Cami drive him to the hospital, and when she says let's get him help, Jake shouts no. That made me laugh, the way he said it abruptly. It was supposed to be an emotionally charged scene, but it just came off as so silly. The ending was unsatisfactory. Her mom just stands there while her and Jake hug. After all of the stress and dysfunction this guy has caused, if I was her, I would've been telling him to get his hands off of my daughter. So if you're looking for a story where the characters aren't stupid, you won't find it here. The only character who truly had sense was Cami's friend's boyfriend, who told her the guy might be 50 and bald for all she knew. He turned out to be neither, but she still put her life in danger. The whole time she was sneaking around I kept thinking I hope she doesn't get killed. If this were real life, I don't think it would've ended the way it did. Girls who meet up with men they've been talking to online usually get murdered. Just like many Lifetime films, the lesson is valuable, but the events throughout the story, in addition to the poor acting, make it quite annoying to watch.
Scarface (1983)
Extremely overrated. First I thought it was reprehensible, but then I thought it was hilarious
I'm ashamed that I even watched this. I saw it was on TV one night, and I love crime dramas/neo-noir, so I thought I'd give it a try. I wanted to see if it lived up to the hype it receives. Unfortunately, I was disappointed. Hugely disappointed, to tell the truth. I really will never understand why so many people rave about this movie. It's tedious, overly violent, sleazy, misogynistic, and repulsive. For 3 hours, we watch a Cuban immigrant (Al Pacino) rise through the ranks of the drug trade, alienating and destroying the relationships of his family and friends along the way. He strikes his own sister after following her and a guy she was dancing with into the men's restroom, because he was so mad at her for wanting to have sex with the man. Sheesh. He reacted with such an elevated level of rage, that I thought she was his girlfriend when I first turned to the channel the movie was on, without having known the roles of all the characters. Then he marries another man's wife (Michelle Phieffer), and starts verbally abusing her. The language throughout the whole film is so vulgar, that I'm glad I watched it on television. After a couple of hours had gone by, they were cussing so much that the picture froze. I agree with one of the people who left a negative review - maybe it is a guy thing. There's virtually no women in the movie. He treats his wife horribly, to the point of it being disturbing. He doesn't want anything out of life besides money. The story is so purposeless, you know? Watching it more than once gave me the opportunity to change my perspective of it, because I was really turned off the first time. I think I was just shocked by the level of violence. I turned the channel and spent the rest of my evening watching something else at the scene where they were in NYC, attempting to assassinate a world leader by driving behind him, with the man's kids in the back. I just had enough. By the second or third time, I was less bothered by it, and actually found myself laughing. And that's when I realized: I don't know how anybody can watch this with a straight face. It's so ridiculous and unrealistic.
My biggest gripe, if I'm being honest, is having an Italian-American playing an Hispanic. Just because there was a similarity in appearance didn't mean it wasn't ridiculous. In fact, the whole cast are all non-Hispanic. I know it was a completely different time. Filmmakers weren't concerned about offending people like they are now, but to have an entire group of people playing a race that's different from their own is quite outlandish. So that's strike 1 for me. As a person of color myself, I never liked how black, Italian, and Latino people are always portrayed as gangsters in the media anyway. Strike 2 was the cringe acting performances. I'm sorry, but Al Pacino really wasn't all that menacing. I don't know if it was bad acting, or if he's just the type of person who's funny without trying to be, but his performance was more laughable than anything. I don't care where I am - I can see a photo or something else from this movie and laugh. I saw a Scarface t-shirt when I was browsing on a clothing website and started laughing. It's just hard to take it seriously. It's now pegged as humorous in my mind. It's like a farce of the drug trade. The only positive I can identify is that it's quintessentially 80s. But I think it would've had a chance of being meaningful if the main character underwent a transformation of some kind. I like crime stories that have some type of resolution, or the people who are guilty of the crime are brought to justice. Scarface is just a film that tried to be deep and serious, but is actually idiotic. Can't think of anyone this film would appeal to, besides people who lowkey always dreamed of getting successful off of easy money, instead of going to school and getting a legitimate career.
The Perfect Nanny (2001)
Convincing performance from the lead actress, but the story is really dumb overall
As ridiculous as some Lifetime movies are, they do have some element of relatability. They're often centered around deception and secrets, and I think it's safe to say, we've all had someone in our life who we ended up discovering we couldn't trust, despite them having tried their hardest to make a positive first impression. I won't go into details, but I recently found out someone lied to me, and this was a person who was desperate for a friendship. The lie itself wasn't anything serious, but it's still disappointing when you're lied to. Not like I thought they were all that genuine anyway, because they showered me with compliments when I first met them. Nonetheless, I was still surprised. I'm trying to be more diligent about setting boundaries, so I decided to cease contact with them. People who lie don't bring anything but confusion, and I prefer to keep my life stress-free. I feel like The Perfect Nanny took the concept of developing a close relationship with someone - platonic or romantic - who is untrustworthy, and it could've been captured realistically, but it was just over-the-top and extreme.
I had seen Tracy Nelson in another Lifetime movie, The Perfect Tenant, and I gotta say, she portrays a mentally disturbed individual convincingly. In the Perfect Nanny she plays Andrea McBride, a former psychiatric hospital patient who has an unhealthy obsession with romance novels. She fakes her identity by giving herself the name Nikki Harcourt, and applies for a nanny position for a handsome widower, Dr. James Lewis (Bruce Boxleitner). She immediately hits it off with his kids, Fawn and Ben (Dana Barron and Scott Terra) when he's interviewing her. He wants a nanny who can teach Ben Spanish, due to living in SoCal. Unfortunately, her not being versed in the language is a deal breaker, so he tells her he'll be hiring someone else. Later on that night, she goes to the house of the woman who he planned on hiring and kills her. To be honest, I didn't quite understand that, because it seemed like she let her inside to make a phone call. The film subsequently takes a dark turn, and I felt like most of what happened was stupid.
Reading those idiotic novels fuels Andrea's obsession with James. After moving into the house, she starts acting like they're married. His female colleague, Dr. Julia Bruning (Susan Blakley), comes over for dinner, and Andrea purposely cuts herself when she's alone in the kitchen to get his attention. Knowing Fawn doesn't like Julia, after eavesdropping on their conversation, and hearing Julia tell him about going to Big Bear Lake, she goes to Fawn and tells her what she heard. It was inappropriate for an adult to work in cahoots with a teenager to try and cause a rift in their parent's relationship. It was really neither of their business. James has no knowledge Andrea is having a negative influence on Fawn. If he did, he might've considered letting her go. Knowing this information from Andrea leads Fawn to stalk Julia. She gets in her car and follows her to a restaurant, where she sees her going in with a man. She tells James the next day. He becomes annoyed, tells her the man is gay, and basically says to stop spreading rumors. That's when Fawn starts questioning Andrea's motives, leading her to do investigation of her background. Meanwhile, Andrea's husband Troy (Darren Gray Ward), who she had discovered was cheating at the start of the film, which led her to attempt suicide, hence why she was in the psych hospital, is on her trail.
Most of these Lifetime movies are all the same. A family opens their doors to a complete stranger, just because they seem nice on the outside. The person goes on a killing spree, unbeknownst to the family they're living with. One member of the family thinks the person is an undercover psycho, but none of their other family members will listen to them, instead making it seem like they're the one who has a problem. They start doing their own detective work, and find out information that confirms their suspicions. So the message of the story is, take your time getting to know people. Don't let them jump into your life. Even if a person is charming, you should approach them with at least some weariness. It's a valid lesson, but the way the filmmakers went about presenting it, made it get lost in the absurdity of the story's events. Like are we really supposed to believe a doctor would be dumb enough not to notice that a person is acting weird, especially if they're living under the same roof? In real life, people are not that skilled at hiding they're a liar. More often than not, it's quite easy to pick up on clues that they're not telling the truth. There was a scene where they were eating breakfast, and Fawn catches Andrea in a lie. But James doesn't respond by showing that he's unhappy with Andrea. He chastises Fawn for accusing her of lying. See what I mean? That's just stupid. At one point Lifetime movies were disrupting my sleep schedule, because I was addicted to them. I did come to the realization that they're really not worth staying up late for. Once is all I needed to watch The Perfect Nanny. Give it a try if you want, but it's not worth your time.
Deceptions (1990)
Tedious and predictable
Honestly, 4 stars is too many, but I wanted to be generous. Deceptions was not what I expected. This was the slowest-moving and most yawn-inducing film I've seen in a while. Even a physically attractive lead actor (Harry Hamlin) wasn't enough to keep me engaged. And that's unusual for me, because I love eye candy, but the acting was so melodramatic, and the plotline was so weak, that I found myself not even caring to know what the resolution of the story was. Harry Hamlin is a cop named Nick Gentry, who, along with his partner, Jack 'Harley' Kessler (Robert Davi) are investigating the murder of a man killed by his wife (Nicollette Sheridan), a socialite who spends her days walking around the house in a bikini, in what appears to be a home invasion. It's no surprise when her and Nick sleep together. Instead of remaining objective, he lets himself get hypnotized by her looks. How stupid is it for a cop to have sex with the suspect? The loopholes and inconsistencies are annoying. Not to mention, once the characters start making self-destructive moves, I'm done. If you ask me, the whole film seems to have been made just for the cast to show off their bodies. Granted, it is labeled as erotic, but I need more than that if I'm watching a mystery/crime drama. It's okay if you're looking for something mindless to watch. But if you want a solid storyline, multi-dimensional characters, or anything deep, I would suggest looking elsewhere.
Extreme Movie (2008)
Should be called "Extreme Stupidity"
There's some movies that weren't even worth making. The money could've been used for something much more useful, like a charity donation. Or anything that would help people. This is hands down the most idiotic, obscene, and filthiest junk that's ever been created. And it was marketed towards teenagers?? Who would let their child watch this garbage? The whole film is a collection of sketches about the sexual encounters of teenagers. Don't really see where that's humorous, because it's not like teenagers should be having sex anyway. I don't have kids, but I can't see myself being one of those parents who gives my son or daughter condoms/birth control and then says "okay, be careful!" They're not mature enough to handle the emotions and changes that come with having sex in a relationship. As if the premise isn't ridiculous enough, there's an endless amount of vulgarity. A bisexual camera show, vibrators... This boy using a time machine to travel backwards and have sex with an historical figure. The scene with the girl passing gas was stupid and overdone. It might've been funny the second or third time, but after that it just became disgusting. I experience digestive issues off and on (I'm not consistent with eating healthy or getting adequate sleep). There is no way I would've done that in front of a guy who I was trying to romance, or anybody for that matter. I get embarrassed if people even hear my stomach making noises. It's like filmmakers have no idea how people outside of Hollywood behave and interact with each other. They live so sheltered from the general public. The jokes in this movie are overly stupid, and that's just lazy on the part of the writers. They should be ashamed of themselves for making such repulsive material. Go figure the minds of youth have been poisoned.
The Killer in the Guest House (2020)
Not a bad sequel, but characters still make the same dumb mistakes
Marcus Rosner is back as the homicidal psychopath who charms women with his good looks and muscles. Sequel to The Killer Downstairs, The Killer in the Guest House has a dark vibe, but is actually more laughable in comparison. The general setup is the same: woman in her 30s (she's 29 when the film starts and has a birthday in the story), parents left the house to her, and she rents out a part of it for extra money. She also has a close female friend who's by her side through her ups and downs. Only difference is, unlike in The Killer Downstairs, where the main character was an out-of-work lawyer, Gina Larson (Chelsea Hobbs) is a fashion photographer who's low on cash, and she's treated poorly by her ex-boyfriend, Levon, who she's still in contact with for business purposes. In the Killer Downstairs, the main character was being harassed by her boss. She discovers the profile of a handsome man on a renter's website, Mark James, and reaches out to him. He arrives at the house, posing as a divorced pilot with a 7-year-old daughter. She shows him to the guesthouse in the backyard, and she immediately falls for him.
I'll be the first to admit - this movie is garbage. Murdering people simply for not liking them. There's really no purpose to a film with that type of storyline. And I'm not one for watching things that don't have a purpose. The only reason I watched this, and kind of liked it, is because I'm a sucker for a tall guy with abs. But alas, I'm still ashamed of myself. Honestly, Marcus Rosner is much hotter in this than he was in The Killer Downstairs. He doesn't look all that good with facial hair. Not saying that excuses murdering people. His appearance creates a weird feeling for the film-watcher, you know? Because it's like, are we supposed to sympathize with him? Are we supposed to cheer for him even in his darkest moments? He's morally deprived, but then it's also like hmmm, he is sexy. I don't like having mixed feelings about a character. He's much less menacing in this sequel than he was in the original, so that could be contributing to why you might find yourself more focused on his appearance than him being a murderer. It's kind of like the writers wanted to make it seem like his killing was justified. Like he murders any man who commits a wrongdoing to Gina, such as her ex-boyfriend. But then he also kills men who he thinks is trying to make a move and start a relationship with her, because he wants her all to himself.
It's predictable, surprise surprise. The characters make the same idiotic mistakes as they did in the last film. Of course Gina sleeps with him, so it was like she willingly crossed a boundary, and then gets upset when she discovers he's a weirdo and a liar (putting cameras throughout the house, using a fake drawing that he took a picture of with his phone to make it look like he had artwork from his nonexistent daughter). It was ridiculous they would portray a 30-year-old woman as acting like she has zero experience with men. Overall, with the exception of the murdering Mark does (which, I must say as a warning, is quite gruesome), this movie is funny in a way. The characters are so dumb that you have to laugh. Well, except for Gina's friend. She was kind of annoying. But still, this can't be taken any seriously. I personally just like to watch it to look at Marcus Rosner. Besides eye candy, it doesn't offer anything special or groundbreaking. If you're okay with that, then you'll enjoy this sequel.
The Killer Downstairs (2019)
Moral of the story: Never trust a hot guy
No, seriously, that's not the actual message that's communicated. Although, guys who are handsome do often have a split personality. I try not to generalize, but 9 times out of 10, what glitters is not necessarily gold. The Killer Downstairs is a good movie that exemplifies why you shouldn't be so quick to trust a person you don't know. It was nice to see characters in their 30s who were believable for a change. Their conversations sounded natural, and their situations were unique. Everyone in that age group isn't always married with children, and has their life figured out. As is common in Lifetime movies, the audience is introduced to the main character right away. Alison Peters (Cindy Busby) is a lawyer who is struggling financially after having resigned from the law firm where she was employed, and now works at a big box store. Like most young women, she is routinely leered at and made uncomfortable by various men. Even when she was in the middle of working, a random male customer stops to stare at her. He's standing next to patio furniture that's on display, and he sits down, continuing to stare. Her back was to him the whole time, so when she turns around, she sees him, and he starts flirting with her. I think the filmmakers put that in the opening to show the audience how vulnerable she is. Not to say women are unsafe no matter where they go, but they are stared at, followed, and harassed by men, even in the most unexpected of places, to the point that it is a societal issue. Especially women in their 20s and 30s. But it's not just the customers' advances she has to put up with - her pervy boss won't leave her alone. So she just has problems with men all around.
As a solution to her money problems, she decides to rent out her basement by posting an ad on a website, and meets James (Marcus Rosner), who she is surprised to see alone, due to his picture online showing him posing with a woman and child. He tells her he's now divorced, and it's not talked about any further. They hit it off in a short amount of time. The only downside is, he's making himself a little too comfortable. The morning after he gets settled in, she finds him in the kitchen making breakfast, and that's an issue, because one of the house rules stated he was supposed to use the kitchen that's in the basement, seeing as it has all of the amenities of an apartment, so there's really no need for him to come upstairs for anything. Her work friend tells her to set boundaries. But she continues to fall for his charm, leading her to divulge too much information about the issues with her ex-boyfriend... And they end up kissing. That was quite predictable. He's a tall, physically fit guy. She had left a toxic relationship. When you get two people like that together, and they're occupying the same space, sparks are going to fly. I know you shouldn't fall in love with someone exclusively because their looks, but you can't help it sometimes. Despite agreeing with each other that the kiss was meaningless, and they were still "cool," their romantic feelings are ignited, and they start living as more of a couple than a tenant/renter. Alison's life becomes increasingly scary when he turns out to be homicidal, as well as possessive, just like her ex was. James doesn't want her talking to anyone, men or women.
Towards the end of the film, he's sleeping in Alison's bed. When she's asleep, he reaches over her to pick up her phone, and sees a text from her friend saying she discovered the picture he posted on the renter's website was a stock photo. He cropped his picture in place of the original guy, to make it look like he had a family. At the end of the message, she tells Alison she needs to get him out of her house now. The next day he breaks into her house and kidnaps her. He was willing to go to great lengths, no matter how extreme, to keep other people from getting in the way of their "relationship." His acting was so convincing. I don't even see performances like that from well-known stars. Case in point of why Lifetime movies are underrated. I also love how in the newer ones, women are portrayed as less fearful and more courageous. When they're being attacked by a man, they at least try to fight back, unlike in the 90s Lifetime films.
Considering the world we're living in, where people going places and living with strangers has gotten so normalized (Uber, Lyft, those websites where you can rent a room from anyone), I feel like this is an important film for young adults to see, particularly millennial women. Many of us do feel awkward when it comes to setting boundaries, especially when it's a man who we like. We don't take our time getting to know someone, and I've been guilty of that too. This movie can be an example of the red flags to look for. It's not the unrealistic crap that you see in mainstream Hollywood. No young woman is exempt from being victimized. The story might seem far-fetched, but the truth is, there are lots of men out there who are like James - friendly on the outside, but unstable once you get to know them. Or if they're not unstable, they're a creep. I met this man in grad school (he was married, so we were just friends). We don't talk anymore. I recently went on his Facebook - a majority of the stuff he posted was toilet jokes, sexual garbage... He didn't present himself as a crude person in public. I felt unsettled that I had talked to someone who was perverted for 2 or 3 years, unknowingly. I shared personal things about myself, and I hardly knew anything about him. He barely even mentioned his wife. My point in saying that is, it's common for men to put on a facade. And many of them are so good at doing it, the women who they encounter don't find out they're crazy until it's too late. This film, even with the occasional lame acting performances, really does send across an important message. Don't judge it negatively just because it's from Lifetime.
Living in Fear (2001)
Suspenseful and powerful acting
Living in Fear is a far cry from William R. Moses's film that I watched before this, Alone with a Stranger. I would recommend this if you want an actual thriller that contains twists and turns, and leaves you guessing to the very end. This plotline made more sense compared to Alone with a Stranger. It captured the emotional pain and suffering that so many people carry with them from childhood.
Chuck Hausman (William R. Moses) returns to the community where he was born and raised with his new wife Rebecca (Marcia Cross). The town, Deerfield, is tight-knit, isolated, and not to mention, somewhat creepy. The residents are typical small town folk: gossipy, nosy, judgmental, and close-minded. Chuck is returning for the reading of his father's, reverend Leo Hausman, will, who traumatized him with routine belt beatings. The people who knew Leo have always despised Chuck - they placed the blame on him for a murder that happened 20 years ago. Rebecca soon finds herself in an unsettling position of wondering if she married a killer, or if he's innocent, and the people in the town have just always held a grudge against him.
Alone with a Stranger (2000)
You would be wasting your time
Please do not watch this! It is crazy dumb!! It's so bad that I couldn't even finish. I'll probably come back and change this review, but I'm telling you, it's really hard to get through. It's not entertaining in the slightest - it's a convoluted story with a plotline that doesn't make any sense. I know Lifetime movies are supposed to be dramatic, but this is just idiotic. It's too outlandish. A man's envious twin brother (William R. Moses) stops at nothing to have his life. He kidnaps him, takes him to some house, and chains him to a chair, using his girlfriend as his partner in crime. He goes to his home and impersonates him, fooling his wife because they're identical. I really don't understand what the point of this was??? Okay, he was jealous, but his actions are extreme, and would get him placed in a psychiatric institution. And for some reason, his wife didn't know he had a twin.
I really have nothing else to say. It's too ridiculous for elaboration. I didn't understand the use of the f-word and thought it was unnecessary. I don't know why they would curse in a made-for-TV movie. Just seems out of place. It's not like the film gives off an emotionally charged, suspenseful vibe, because the acting is laughable. The positive reviews are confusing. We all have different tastes, but this really was a mess, and I'm trying to be objective.
A Wife's Nightmare (2014)
Really not as cringe as you would think
Okay, I know the newer Lifetime movies are much phonier and unrealistic compared to the ones from the 90s. The ones that have been made in the last few years, I definitely stay away from. When I saw the year on this one, my expectations were kind of low, but then I figured it might not be all that bad, seeing as how 2014 was a semi-long time ago. I thought the synopsis for A Wife's Nightmare was interesting: a young woman appears out of nowhere, proclaiming to be a man's daughter. He's now married with a teenage son. But what seems like it would be a joyous occasion actually causes problems in their household.
What I didn't like, was how the movie opens with the girl approaching the couple to tell the man he's her father. I don't like it when filmmakers jump right into the story. That makes it feel rushed. The very first scene has Caitlin Patterson (Lola Tash) sitting in her car and watching the house of Gabe and Liz Michaels (Dylan Neal and Jennifer Beals). They pull into the driveway, get out of the car, and as they're walking up the steps into their house, Caitlin walks up to them, and tells Gabe she's his daughter. Unfortunately, her introduction to their son AJ doesn't go well. He's not happy to find out he has a half sibling. That is, until he develops a crush on her after watching her stand in front of the bathroom mirror and getting ready for bed that night, wearing pajamas that don't leave much to the imagination. Liz starts to notice AJ's leering gaze towards her, and eventually Gabe's. She obviously feels like the sexual energy between them is inappropriate. When she comes home from work, they're outside cooking burgers on the grill, and she notices him put his hand on her back, then sliding it somewhat of a ways down. Later on, she calls him out on the gesture, and he denies it, emphasizing he would never have feelings for a 19-year-old girl. Liz takes his word, but still battles with her suspicions. Their marriage was on the rocks long before Caitlin showed up at their doorstep, due to Gabe being a struggling musician, and her mental health deteriorating from too much stress at work, as well as carrying the burden of paying the mortgage and bills, with little to no contribution from him, which led to her being hospitalized. Being back home is still difficult for her, as she now has to deal with AJ's rudeness towards her.
After Liz notices her home office door open when she goes downstairs in the middle of the night, runs into Caitlin, who got out of bed to get a glass of water, and discovers an important document has been deleted from her laptop the next day - she puts 1 and 1 together, and suspects Caitlin was trying to sabotage her chances of making a comeback at work. Which causes her to feel overwhelmed, seeing as how she's not in good graces with her boss, after having previously made a serious mistake before going to the hospital. From that point on, her living with them starts creating tension, and that tension builds to the point of causing arguments between her and Gabe. Things only get weirder when AJ kisses Caitlin by a mistake. He was excited because she had gotten the phone number of a girl from school for him. Their family issues become much worse when people who don't live with them witness Gabe's odd behavior. They invite friends and neighbors over for a cookout, and he explodes when he sees a guy touching Caitlin's necklace. His reaction went beyond what would be considered normal for a father to have. His rage was so profound, that it was more like a jealous lover.
Just as it looks like Liz and Gabe are headed for a divorce, AJ comes home to make a gut-wrenching discovery. When he goes upstairs, he hears moaning, leading him to walk in on Gabe and Caitlin having sex. Liz comes home afterwards, and the crap hits the fan. Beforehand she had been trying to search for Caitlin's familial records, and her suspicion was confirmed: she wasn't Gabe's daughter. The DNA results were fake. Her mom had also died years ago.
That was a plot twist if I had ever seen one! I definitely did not see that coming. The acting wasn't always the most groundbreaking, as that is characteristic of Lifetime movies. But I enjoyed it, honestly. It did an excellent job of showing how women are often pushed over the edge when they're saddled with doing everything, and receive no appreciation from their husband or kids - only getting nothing from them but grief. The sex scene is a bit graphic, so I wouldn't recommend this for parents to watch with their kids. I think anyone who watches it, even the people who don't like Lifetime films, will be surprised.
The Perfect Tenant (2000)
Mildly poor acting, but suspenseful and solid story overall
I will admit, I was hesitant to watch the beginning of the Perfect Tenant. When I knew the story involved a child's parent killing themselves, and the child finds them, I was a bit hesitant to see that, and thought about skipping over it. But I decided to let the film play in its entirety. Just as a warning though, the opening might be triggering for people who lost a parent to suicide.
A boy named Danny Summer (played by Maxwell Caulfiend) discovers his father has took his life on Christmas Eve. It's absolutely heartbreaking to watch. He finds him hanging from the rafters in the living room, in the midst of carolers singing outside of the door. Time is fast forwarded, and we see him as an adult, sitting in his car in a neighborhood and spying on a house across the street. The residents of the home are Jessica Michael (Linda Purl), an aspiring restaurant owner, and her adopted teenage daughter, Laura. Finding his father dead from suicide has led him to become homicidal. Jessica rents out their guesthouse to him. Laura instantly feels uncomfortable when she meets him, and can't shake the weird vibe he gave her. In fact, she was the one who noticed he was in his car watching them when her boyfriend picked her up and drove by him. She has a hard time convincing Jessica that he's a creep. I won't go into detail about what happens, but I will say the characters' connections to one another was shocking and unexpected. The acting performances were amateurish at times. The cast's delivery of their lines didn't always sound natural, especially from Danny. Like when he told Jessica something along the lines of 'you should rent to me, I'm the perfect tenant.' The way he said it wasn't genuine, but I guess that was the point, seeing as how he was a lunatic who was pretending to be nice.
The only issue I had with the film, was their portrayal of Danny as a murderer due to his father taking his life. I don't think it's common for people whose parent died by suicide to become homicidal. Hollywood pretty much never depicts mental illness in an accurate light, but what do you expect from a movie that was made 24 years ago. He feels as though he has a reason to kill Jessica and Laura. I won't share it here, because you have to see this for yourself. It's quite impressive for a film that wasn't a hit in the box office.
No One Could Protect Her (1996)
Characters lack common sense, which gets infuriating at times. It's still an emotional and moving drama
Somehow I found myself going on a Lifetime movie binge. I had always been a fan - just never been able to watch them because I don't have cable, so I was happy to see they're on YouTube. I know some people think they're bad. And honestly, I agree with them. The acting isn't/wasn't exactly the best. The characters also defy logic by placing themselves in various kinds of danger. But overall, I like how they covered real world issues, which gives them more depth than Hallmark movies. The only downside to these films - and this is just my personal feelings - is depending on the subject matter, they can be quite upsetting to watch. The hardest ones for me are about eating disorders and domestic violence. I either have to watch the movie in pieces, or I just can't through it at all. No One Could Protect her is one that I managed to sit through, even though it's about a married woman who's raped when she's home alone.
Joanna Kerns is a convincing actress. She has you absorbed in the story in such a way that big name Hollywood stars don't necessarily do. I had tried to watch her in that horrible film Terror in the Family, but that was one I couldn't make it through. Her and Dan Lauria played parents whose teenage daughter (Hilary Swank) had violent outbursts whenever she didn't get her way. It just made me too anxious. I prefer her in this movie. Dan Lauria was in it as well. I thought she was so believable as a woman who had been violated and traumatized by a monster who's hiding in the neighborhood. You can feel her pain, anguish, and how she longs for a sense of normalcy after having her sense of security taken away. She completely owns the role of Jessica Raynor. Her husband (Anthony Denison) leaves town to go gambling with a friend. The man breaks into the house, drags her outside, and rapes her. What ensues is a string of sleepless nights, as her husband is frustrated with the police not moving fast enough to find the guy, so he stays up to catch him on his own.
It's a great (albeit difficult to watch at times) film. I just didn't understand why they never locked their front door. That bugged me. The sicko kept breaking into the house. You'd think after the 3rd or 4th time, it might dawn on her or her husband to lock the door before they go to bed? People do that for real, not locking their doors or windows because they live in a small town, so they figure it's safe and there's no need. I always found that to be such flawed thinking. I also thought it was an awful idea that she continued to be in the house alone even after the rape happened. Just because her sister lived down the street didn't mean she was safe. It would've been more logical to have someone stay with her. But then again, that's Lifetime movies for you.
Jessica and her husband's relationship is very endearing. He's willing to stop at nothing to protect her, even if that means risking his own life. She also develops the strength to give herself protection, and started out terrified, but became fearless as the story progressed. It's a good movie for if you're bored and want something to watch that's not mainstream or generic.
*For anyone who experienced sexual violence, this film might be triggering*
The Kelly Clarkson Show (2019)
I must've been delirious
I wanted to go back on here and change my review for this. I knew I had rated it highly, but I totally forgot that I gave it a 9! I don't know what I was thinking. Guess I was just bored, and desperate for anything that could serve as a distraction from the uncertain world we were living in. I watched this during the lockdown, and I probably found it entertaining because I had gone somewhat insane from being in the house every day for months at a time. Then again, if I'm being honest, it did cheer me up. Don't get me wrong, Kelly is a wonderful person. She's very kind. However, she always did something that I found hard to ignore. I noticed in her interviews, most of if not everything the guest said, she would turn it around to make it about herself. I think that's something we all do every now and then. It can be appropriate sometimes, depending on the conversation (like if you're talking to a teen or young adult, you're much older, and they want reassurance that what they're feeling or going through is normal. In that case, it's okay to talk about your own experiences). But with her, it was excessive. I work with people who constantly talk about themselves, or something that relates to them, like their kids, and it gets incredibly annoying. I don't know if her guests notice, and if they do, I'm sure they're not saying anything because they're trying to be polite. I feel sorry for them. When people turn everything around to be about them, it can make whoever they're talking to feel like the person really doesn't care about getting to know them. I can't believe it's still on, along with the other daytime junk. Very few people give a talk show their undivided attention. I've seen them on in car dealership waiting areas, and nobody's watching. They're looking at stuff on their phone or laptop (I've only seen court shows on in doctor's offices, and people weren't interested in that either). It's not enjoyable watching someone who's a blabbermouth, and the folks around them hardly get a chance to say anything. Who knows, this might be on for the next 30 years.
The Company You Keep (2023)
Ha! I knew this wouldn't last long
I don't even know why I bothered watching this show. Judging from the previews, it looked borderline pornographic. I was like hmmm, 10pm... Isn't that still too early to bring something like this on? If this was supposed to be an adults only show, it should've came on way past 11. Seeing as how most parents let their kids run the house, I doubt they're in bed by 10, even on a school night. They probably go to bed whenever they want. There wasn't nudity, but nothing was left to the imagination. And I was actually disappointed with all of the positive reviews. Makes me wonder what the world is coming to. Honestly, the steamy love scenes didn't give any amount of maturity to the series. Ironically, the writers were gearing this towards grown-ups, but what happened is that it gave off the vibe of being enjoyable more so for teenagers. At least that was my impression. There was so much of a focus on sex, that it seemed like it would only appeal to adolescents. They're often curious about it, which is normal during puberty. But I don't see how a show where a man and woman have excessive amounts of sex would entertain an adult. It's nothing we haven't seen before. All of the sex scenes, along with the scenes that implied they were about to have sex, got to a point of being very tiresome and weird. They even had sex in a car! Who would watch something like that, besides the lowest common denominator of folks? You know the ones I'm talking about... They don't even know the capital of the state they're living in, and ask a lot of dumb/silly questions at work, that they could've simply Googled.
I can ignore the overuse of sex scenes if there's a decent storyline, but that wasn't even present here. A CIA officer (Catherine Haena Kim) letting herself get played by a conman (Milo Ventimiglia), just because he's handsome. I did used to think he was hot, but now he just looks okay to me. I can see his Mediterranean ancestry somewhat, but he mostly has generic Caucasian features. It doesn't make sense that he's so sexy to the point where she fell for him head over heels, lost all of her mental faculties, and it never once crossed her mind that she might be jeopardizing her career. Why was the audience expected to believe a woman with such a high power occupation was so stupid? I've seen shows from the 60s and 70s that paint women in more of a progressive light than this. It was kind of troubling something like this was made in the modern age. It pretty much sent across the message that women should lower their standards once they enter into a sexual relationship with a man. Forget doing any research on him, or trying to get to know him on a personal level. Just as long as he has a nice body and you have fun making love, it's all good in the neighborhood. Come on, people, that's shallow! But hey, what should I expect from the same network that's been showing The Bachelor for the last 20 years? I'm not surprised this was canceled. The story wasn't going anywhere, and I had a feeling the writers were going to run out of ideas. So happy this is no longer polluting the airwaves. Society doesn't need any more normalization of toxic relationships by the media than they already have.