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Reviews
I Was a Mail Order Bride (1982)
Love Boat-y Extended Play
Two attractive, single twenty-somethings, each with a hidden agenda, thrust together under the guise of potentially finding a mate.
The year was '82, Valerie Bertinelli was a hot commodity, and the tv gurus were eager to cash in. There's no denying she was adorable and personable, and worthy of lead roles.
That being said, this vehicle quickly skidded off the rails. The feeble writing and wince-inducing attempts at humor - and heart-felt moments - never gave it much of a chance. Add to it that Ted Wass was totally wrong for the 'romantic' role opposite Valerie. He came across as an aloof, arrogant and clueless twit, resulting in zero chemistry between the two. And I do mean zero. Nada. Nothing here will convince you that these two would fall for each other. And yet, onward we trod.
Bless her heart, Valerie tries to make the mess she's forced to deal with work. But nothing here makes a bit of sense, or is capable of holding a thinking person's interest for very long. And I'm wondering if Wass was just contractually obligated to play this role, because he couldnt have possibly come across as less interested.
This gets 3/10 only because Valerie did what she could with what she was given to work with. But the further it went, the messier it became. I guess the joke was on me for enduring this one to the very end.
Suitcase Killer: The Melanie McGuire Story (2022)
The increasing descent of LIfetime
Often when reading reviews regarding true crime, a thought in the back of my mind is some reviewers may have a stake in the game - someone who was impacted in real life {or even imagined} by a case, and as such, the review may carry a predetermined bias. Similar to when you read the 5-star or 1-star reviews of a product on Amazon.
Be assured I had no stake whatsoever in the Suitcase Killer case. I was in a true crime mood and came upon this one, but had never heard of the McGuire case before viewing it.
But I do have a motive in writing this review, and that is to note the continued slide of Lifetime beyond the cesspool into an ever deepening abyss. The vast majority of Hollywood has made it abundantly and increasingly clear for decades that they detest God and people of faith, and are more than eager to trash Him {and us} at every turn. Maybe Lifetime has been doing this for a while now without my knowledge, but here's a news flash to them, and multiple other networks: The majority of Americans dont find blasphemous language in a show entertaining, nor do we ever find it necessary, in any fashion. Lifetime is one network that used to show restraint in regard to this. No longer.
The lead actress was respectable in her role here, but everyone else was cookie cutter performance level. And all Lifetime did by choosing to blaspheme God repeatedly here was turn this one from forgettable to unwatchable. This is one viewer who wont be hurrying back to seek a repeat performance anytime soon. In reality, 1 star is 1 too many.
Nightcomer (2013)
Maybe In the Right Hands
What this one has going for it: Atmosphere. An interesting premise. The attempt to take you inside the world of a tormented soul with seemingly no escape - but with that faint glimmer of hope that keeps her going into the next night.
What it has working against it: A paper thin budget, sound and lighting issues galore, and a story in the hands of an uninspired novice. You quickly accept its not going to be a cinematic masterpiece, but you hope the story will build to a place it never gets to.
Nightcomer comes off as a rookie production from a collegiate film class, which is unfortunate because it does have one more thing going for it. Mackenzie is a terrific actress - when she has solid meat to work with and be inspired by - but her talent is wasted here. At the time of this writing she hasnt acted in a few years, and maybe has stepped away from it altogether. I suspect that may be a blessing to her life personally, but I've always found her work to be a step above most young actresses of her generation.
Oh, I did like the feel of the musical score during the end credits. Beyond that, not much memorable here. I'd love to see Mackenzie again with a strong script in the hands of a talented director. I believe she would knock it out of the park.
The Killer Speaks (2012)
A Narcissistic Feeding Frenzy
After completing the first season, which wasnt easy to digest, I'd had more than my fill of this drama-less fiasco. First off, these 43+ minutes stories could have been told in 20. You get the same, repetitive commentary and flashes of the killer's face, over and over again. It doesnt take long for it to become nauseating to the viewer.
This series is strong reflection of the 'all eyes on me' culture we have created. I recall a time when good was good, and evil was evil. Over the last quarter century we have blurred the lines significantly. Now when you do evil acts and commit heinous crimes, you get a book deal and TV appearances, maybe even a cult following. There's little doubt here that the killers are eating up their 15 minutes of fame here. What else do they have to do with their time? Its a nice break from the mundane repetition of prison life.
So the only potential redeeming aspect of this series would be to gain valuable insight into the killers' minds and motives. But here again, the viewer will be short changed. The majority of the convicted murders come off as aloof, still in denial to a high degree, and lost in their own fantasy worlds. Occasionally you see a glimpse of a conscience or a sliver of remorse, but it comes off as remorse for being caught, and a resignation that they wont be experiencing life outside of prison walls ever again. Before they slip back into their bubbles of narcissism. You do, however. Get a lot of psychotic justification for doing what they did - matter of factly, without emotion.
This is but a sick glorification of sadistic killers solely to make a buck for the network that produced it. Expect more, you'll likely come up empty. Save yourselves a few hours and skip this mess.
The Price of Honor (2014)
An American Horror Story of the Worst Kind
Helplessness. Frustration. Repulsion. Rage. Grief. Emptiness. And sadness - a deep, lingering sadness that grips you and wont let go.
These are but a taste of the myriad of intense emotions that the story of Amina and Sarah Said will take hold in your heart, and stay with you long after it has played out to its conclusion.
For me its been since that night long ago, likely sometime in 2008, when the tragedy of the Said sisters first came to light on America's Most Wanted. This docudrama begins with that tape - that 911 tape I first heard on AMW. That tape was presented on that first airing, and replayed on repeated airings as the hunt for Yaser Said continued for months, then years. That tape has haunted me until this very day. Admittedly, hearing it again brought forth all those emotions again in an instant, and tears started to flow. All the questions that originated from that night came flooding back - the main one being "How can this happen here in America?" And yet in the ensuing years we've come to know that it was all too real -- that Yaser was, and is, one of the most despicably evil souls ever to walk our American shores.
You cannot have a shred of decency in you and not feel rage toward the so-called father of these two teen girls, and toward his family of protectors. You will also feel intense emotion over the continued denial of their cowardly American mother. Part of us can understand it was her self-preservation kicking in, based on a very real fear over what could happen to her. But still, its all so inexcusable.
You will also come to understand - as much as it can be understood - the cultural discrepancies that exist that would allow a crime such as this to ever be acceptable on any level.
The team that put this together did a solid job, no doubt at times putting themselves at great risk from a family of brothers and those who would help to protect them at any cost. I commend them for their determination to doing this right, and seeing it through to what was at the time in 2013 an empty conclusion.
One weakness of this film is it puts heavy emphasis on the older sister Amina, while keeping Sarah in the distant background for most of it. While they had full access to Amina's boyfriend and his mother, its likely they were unable to get cooperation from the family of Sarah's love interest. One can fully understand a family's apprehension to participate in this due to the risk it would entail.
The one satisfying factor in all of this is that a resolution finally came about in 2020. I dont feel its any type of spoiler to add this, as it would be common knowledge to anyone who has followed the case over the years.
Sarah and Amina, I pray for your souls. You didnt deserve the fate you encountered. But you have touched so many hearts with your vibrancy, your spirit, your love of life. Neither of you will ever be forgotten. Certainly not by me. Not for a moment.