Reviews
We Don't Live Here Anymore (2004)
Insufferable piece of crap
Dern is brilliant, indeed, and if that were enough to carry a convoluted story told through a heavy-handed script that doesn't feature a single sympathetic character, then "We Don't Live Here Anymore" would be, too. It isn't, of course.
*Possible spoiler alert*
Are we expected to accept the ending as some kind of redemptive moral triumph? One can only guess, because if the story is intended to have any point at all, the director gives us only the tiniest shreds of a hint what it might be.
I'm no bitter traditionalist. I can live with a film that lacks neat resolution. But this can be construed as "realistic" only by people who are as grossly self-absorbed as the characters on screen. And apparently they are out there. The mind reels.
Can que (1978)
Yeah, but what about the Five Deadly Venoms?
"The Five Deadly Venoms" was a pretty enjoyable kung-fu movie, so I was kind of looking forward to seeing "The Return of the Five Deadly Venoms." Unfortunately, it was a big disappointment. While "The Return of ..." has its moments, it's pretty much your average, ordinary, run-of-the-mill kung-fu movie, featuring interminable (though fairly well choreographed) fight sequences strung together by a thin plot line. The characters and their various handicaps may have been unique at the time (you can probably blame this for inspiring "Crippled Masters"), but the biggest problem for me was that this movie has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO with "The Five Deadly Venoms." You can't really even make the stretch: there are four main characters - not five - and none of them has been trained in the style of a venomous insect or reptile. There is no mention whatsoever of any venom, deadly or otherwise. Aside from sharing many of the same actors, the two movies are completely unrelated. So why is this one titled as if it's a sequel? Very annoying.
American Movie (1999)
This documentary is at once sad and funny
"American Movie" is a satisfying documentary of a wanna-be filmmaker with probably more ambition than common sense. Mark Borchardt is 30 years old, lives with his parents, supports three children by vacuuming a funeral home, and has accrued something like $10,000 in debt without completing a single film project. His already dubious mental stability is exacerbated by the fact that he drinks too much beer, gets high often and is so focused on his "dream" that he willingly lets "American Movie's" documentary crew turn his life into a voyeuristic freak-show. It's a situation that I think worked more successfully in the independent/unreleased documentary "Driver 23" (essentially the same story, only this time the "visionary" wanted to be a heavy metal star), but the crackpot cast of people who populate "American Movie" (Mark's burnout friends, his emotionally distant parents and poor, pitiful uncle Bill) make it a hilarious and occasionally poignant film that's definitely worth a rental.
Breakfast of Champions (1999)
Hello, Blue Monday
Even if you're a huge fan of Vonnegut's books (and I am), you won't necessarily enjoy this adaptation, but it certainly helps. It's been a while since I read "Breakfast of Champions," but I can't imagine why anyone would even _try_ to make a movie out of it. As I recall, the book itself could only be fully appreciated if you'd already read "Slaughterhouse Five" and "God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater." This big-screen effort requires the viewer to have an equally extensive familiarity with Vonnegut's works, not just in order to fully enjoy it, but to make any sense out of it whatsoever.
The video box attempts to portray "Breakfast of Champions" as some sort of quirky, offbeat comedy, but in fact it's as frustratingly incoherent as it is relentlessly unfunny. Shame, considering the novel's mesmerizing lattice of coincidence, paranoia and hilarious satire. Of course, I was in college when I first read it, and at the time generally in a chemically-induced haze. The (few) people who enjoy this adaptation seem to be in similar states of mind.
Anyone who hasn't read the book will likely see "Breakfast of Champions" as a sad attempt to make a wacky, surreal farce in the gonzo vein of "Fear and Loathing." Anyone who's familiar with both books knows that makes it an abysmal misfire.
Very disappointing, to say the least. If you're a Vonnegut and/or Nolte fan, see "Mother Night" instead.
8MM (1999)
My god, what a piece of junk
Remember when Nick Cage could act? Me, too, but only vaguely because it's been quite a while. He absolutely sleepwalks through this routine detective story as a private dick who follows a sadomasochistic trail leading to his own moral undoing. The man is literally incapable of conveying any emotion (which is probably why he was so much more effective in roles as burnt-out cases - see "Birdy," "Leaving Las Vegas," even "Raising Arizona") and as a result his character comes off as Mister Spock, P.I.
Catherine Keener, as Cage's wife, is wasted. The Phoenix kid and the guy from "The Sopranos" turn in solid performances, but it's hardly enough to save the film from crashing and burning about halfway through. The thing goes on for-freaking-EVER, continually passing up perfect opportunities to wrap up the loose ends and get this stinker behind us. On the one hand, you kind of admire the fact that they don't go for the easy, obvious ending. On the other, you just can't stop thinking, "Man, they really ought to end this now and cut their losses." What kills me is that the flick lasts at least a couple of hours with several seemingly interminable scenes that are prolonged for no discernible cinematic effect, and yet the editors somehow managed to chop out everything between Cage's fruitless tour through the seedy Hollywood underbelly and his SUDDEN discovery of a nun at a boarding house who happens to have a suitcase full of clues to give him.
I can't believe I sat through this entire movie.
Dont Look Back (1967)
Check out the DVD if you have the opportunity
If you're a Bob Dylan fan, do yourself a favor and rent the DVD version of "Don't Look Back." It includes an optional audio track of commentary from director D.A. Pennebaker and Bob Neuwirth, Dylan's pal and "tour manager" who was along for the ride on the '65 tour of England this film documents. Their thoughts are interesting, often insightful, occasionally hilarious and shed some light on the movie's more esoteric moments. For example, I never realized the extended hotel room scene of Dylan playing the piano was Bob actually _writing_ a piece of music. You'll probably learn something even if you've read all the books (Benson, Heylin, etc.). Oh, and it turns out Albert Grossman _loves_ the way he's portrayed in the movie, according to Pennebaker. Plus there's a fun alternate version of the "Subterranean Homesick Blues" video (which, for the kids out there, was copied in the '80s by INXS for their "Mediate" video) that was shot in a park somewhere, in which Dylan has even less control of the cards than he does in the final cut. Ginsberg is in the background of this one, too.
Harold and Maude (1971)
Unconventional, which is to say, good. Really, really good.
Tired of formulaic Hollywood love stories? Of course you are. Like its eccentric characters, "Harold & Maude" is charmingly original and the "black comedy" (note the "black" part; if your idea of "comedy" involves episodes of flatulence or Adam Sandler, you probably won't - how shall I put this? - "appreciate" the humor in this film, altho' it really is funny, in a kind of bent way) has developed a cult following over the years because of the profound effect it has on those of us who spend most of our lives feeling like outsiders. (Turns out there are a whole bunch of us.) Eighty-year-old Maude's youthful insouciance, reverence for life and self-styled philosophies give Harold (and us, as viewers) a new and refreshing perspective on both big and small things, and after seeing through her eyes for only a short time we'll never approach our own lives quite the same way again. By the way, if you liked "Rushmore," do yourself a favor and see this movie. It was a big influence, right down to the wonderful Cat Stevens music.
The Thin Red Line (1998)
A powerful movie, but not for short attention spans
Seems all the critics of this film cite "Saving Private Ryan" as being a superior war movie. Fine, but there's simply no sense in comparing the two. Yes, they're both WWII dramas and, yes, they were both released in 1998. But the similarities end there. In short, if you're in the mood for a quick glimpse into the horrors of war driven by a routine Hollywood storyline, rent "Saving Private Ryan." It's a fine little movie and wraps everything up neatly with a tidy, spoon-fed ending that drives the film's point home in case you didn't feel like thinking for yourself during the preceding 169 minutes. I don't mean that disrespectfully - lord knows I get tired of using my noggin about as often as anyone, and I thoroughly enjoyed "Saving Private Ryan." But if you're in a more thoughtful state of mind, or you're simply a fan of cerebral war movies ("Platoon," "Bridge On the River Kwai," "Apocalypse Now," for instance), then you'll likely enjoy "The Thin Red Line" at least as much, if not more than that probably overrated Tom Hanks/Matt Damon vehicle. "The Thin Red Line" is filled with superb acting, powerful imagery and some of the most beautiful cinematography I can remember. The story? Sure, it's thin, too - almost nonexistent, but that's beside the point. "The Thin Red Line" is not a movie that was made to be easily digested or fully, immediately understood. Rather it's something to _experience_, something that will engage your mind, provoke you, frustrate you, evade you and occasionally lead you to a rare, transcendent moment. Kind of like real life. No doubt, this is a challenging movie and not for the insensitive or casual moviegoer. But, for your own sake, pay no mind to the sad, Attention Deficit Disorder-afflicted detractors who say "The Thin Red Line" is dull and boring. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Trekkies (1997)
If you've ever known a "Trekkie," rent this movie.
Whatever your take on the "Star Trek" phenomenon, watching "Trekkies" will make you feel a whole lot better about yourself. This hilarious and occasionally insightful "documentary" presents snapshots of "Star Trek" fanatics for whom the cheesy late-'60s sci-fi show (and its numerous '80s and '90s spin-offs) has become more a way of life than a hobby. If you count yourself among them (Trekkies, Trekkers, whatever), it may be comforting to find that you're not alone - these people are literally EVERYWHERE and whatever the filmmakers' intentions, "Trekkies" does not mock its subjects. For the rest of us, however, the boundless obsession of these characters is solid entertainment. Have you ever felt curious about those "Star Trek" conventions but didn't have the guts to sneak a peek (or the extra cash to throw away)? Here's your chance. You'll look on in amazement at a memorabilia auction in which a man dressed as a Klingon bids $1,400 for a piece of latex that happened to be used as someone's headpiece in a "Star Trek" episode. You'll howl with laughter as one electronically-minded "Trek" zealot rolls down the shoulder of a highway with his head sticking out of the Captain Pike contraption he'd recently built. And you might just wet your pants when you see a football-playing Klingon's celebratory end zone dance. Interviews with cast members from all the "Star Trek" series (alas, no Shatner) are mostly gratuitous, but it hardly matters - the shows' fans are the real stars here. If you've ever known a "Star Trek" geek (or are one yourself), you'll probably get a kick out of "Trekkies."