Change Your Image
lothd
Reviews
What If...?: What If... Doctor Strange Lost His Heart Instead of His Hands? (2021)
Best episode so far
After an average start and not getting better, we finally get a well-written and executed story. Best character design, best production design and best surround sound. The only caveat: some of the narration by The Watcher is completely unnecessary.
Annihilation (2018)
A simple analysis
This film is meant to approximate a psychedelic experience. (I cannot be the only one who noticed the quotes in the music cues from some of the mind-bending sequences in 2001: A Space Odyssey.) The story's not important, just look at those beautiful colours. Nice to put yourself in a drowsy state, but as a film it's worthless. I did buy the soundtrack album (and fell asleep while listening to it).
Paperman (2012)
Absolute garbage
Many people have a need to live in a fantasy world from time to time, a perfect world where love rules and everything always turns out fine. So it's understandable that this animated short is seen as adorable and near perfect by most of the reviewers here. I beg to defer. A sugary concoction without any charm, this gives Disney a bad name. For funny and touching animation, check out any Disney cartoons from The Jungle Book back to the earliest ones. How can this be better than Fantasia, Snow White or any Donald Duck or Mickey Mouse short for that matter? All the old charm is missing, the story is 100% forgettable and the animation is way below par. This paperman requires proper recycling. (Needless to say, the main feature after this was just as bad.)
The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
Once upon a time
...there was a boy who lived in a permissive society. Prostitution is legal there (a good thing), pornographic magazines and videos are freely available (why not) as are gory exploitation films which can be watched legally by anybody over the age of 16. Nobody likes Germans very much. The society is that of the Netherlands. The boy became the writer/director of this movie.
Unfortunately all the influences (not even mentioning Salo, Hostel, Saw etc.) didn't produce a top film. Rather the opposite - WAY opposite.
The sad fact is that this laughable piece of utter garbage will make money because it was produced cheaply and seems to belong to a popular genre - horror. Actually the "horror" is confined to a few short scenes of gore. The concept of the "centipede" is laughable to begin with and the result is unconvincing and downright ridiculous.
This does not even belong in the "so bad it's good" category. It's so bad it's really, really bad.
This review is 100% accurate.
Loong Boonmee raleuk chat (2010)
Two hours of my life well spent
I watched this film today during its initial run at SFX Cinema Emporium, Bangkok. The Thai film rating is 15+.
Rural North-East Thailand. Uncle Boonmee is dying. The film follows him for the last few days of his life. Between the time the audience first meets him and his death in a cave that seems to be full of stars, the ghosts of his wife and long lost son appear, the protagonists talk about life and love and many things in-between and a disfigured princess has an erotic encounter with a catfish. Long, drawn out scenes abound. The surround sound keeps you in the middle of rural Thailand.
Apichatpong Weerasethakul tells a story that doesn't ask or need to be understood. "Uncle Boonmee..." is an art film par excellence. Make what you want of it or don't. It does help if you are familiar with Thai customs and legends.
I wasn't bored for one minute. If you love art films this is essential viewing.
The Hole (2009)
Joe Dante is back
Joe Dante is finally back with a feature film after 'Looney Tunes: Back in Action' (2003), a very long break only interrupted by the occasional TV work. As my fellow reviewer mentioned, 'The Hole' is currently on general release in Thailand (Dolby 3D only). I watched it today.
'The Hole' has what you can expect from PG-13 horror. Think 'Poltergeist' (from which it borrows a plot device). The scares are mild, there is only one slightly gory scene. Atmosphere and story are fine.
I cannot comment on the quality of the 3D effects as I don't have 3D vision. You can expect a lot of character scenes that establish the story as well as scenes obviously designed to show off the technology, including underwater sequences.
If you like Joe Dante's work and don't need ultra-brutal horror, you may well enjoy 'The Hole'. I'm happy to report that Dick Miller has the expected (very short) cameo.
Solomon Kane (2009)
Good, gritty sword & sorcery
I was familiar with the 'Solomon Kane' character before I watched this film, both from the original stories and the Marvel Comics incarnation of the 1970s. The film is based on Robert E. Howard's creation, not on any later story and is all the better for it. The characters and their actions are believable, the atmosphere is great and the special effects are fine. There are copious amounts of sword play as well as sorcery - something that other R. E. H. adaptations in film have been sadly missing (notably 'Conan the Barbarian'). Michael J. Bassett manages to make an exciting film out of what could have been just another good-versus-evil story. Recommended for all fans of gritty fantasy.
Splinter (2008)
Pretty much a waste of time
The favourable reviews and the rating on IMDb made me buy the DVD. I love monster films and gory horror, but this was a huge disappointment. All the characters were thoroughly unsympathetic: a nerdy biologist with his strong girlfriend and an escaped convict with his junkie girlfriend - come on. The plot was awfully familiar: think "The Thing", "Re-Animator" and just about every George Romero film, only that all of those are immeasurably better. The gore effects were sometimes decent, but often ruined by the flashy camera work showing only parts and glimpses of the action - obviously a money saving measure. "Feast" and "Slither" have been mentioned in other comments. Both are considerable better and much more enjoyable than this drab concoction. Avoid.
The Dark Knight (2008)
Mixed feelings
I'm in Thailand which has a release date of today, so I actually saw this film. My feelings are somewhat mixed. It does succeed as a hard action film, but was definitely too long. The joker character is truly terrifying this time around and the film's tone is appropriately violent and dark - both figuratively and literally, much of the action takes place at night. The script caters for the American audience by making the joker and his cronies less criminals and more terrorists - who are probably what Americans are most concerned about. This made it less appealing for me. Much better than average, but still not more than 7 out of 10.
Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)
All the ingredients are there...
What do you expect of an action/fantasy these days? Whatever you expect, you get all of it here and something additional that's sadly lacking in many, if not most: imagination. The creature designs and the special effects that make them come alive are first class, state-of-the-art - I cannot praise them enough. The details I caught made me want to watch the film again immediately to catch the ones I surely missed. Fantastic storytelling and direction from Guillermo del Toro. I now believe the man cannot do wrong. An experience to enjoy again and again. The best film of 2008 so far - and it will be hard to top.
Wanted (2008)
Ultra-brutal action posing as entertainment
Mindless action films abound and can be fun. This is not a mindless action film, but its "mind" caters to nerdy dreams of becoming a more-than-human being. Wouldn't we all like to suddenly have $3.5 million in our bank accounts, tell off our extremely annoying boss (is there any other kind?) and get trained as an ultra-assassin? Then just shoot everybody they tell you to or have a quick case of conscience, then shoot them - cool? Not.
One scene is ripped straight from "The Matrix" series of films and the overall feeling is overwhelmingly Matrix/Terminator. Perhaps it's overoptimistic to look for something new in a movie of this type, but there's hardly anything original. This is not a film the world needs now - or ever.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
Above average - just
Seriously, what can you expect? I expected another hyper-kinetic action movie and got exactly that. The recipe seems to have been "as much action as possible, hardly a quiet moment, throw in everything AND the kitchen sink". If the rubber boat sequence in "Temple of Doom" made you laugh in disbelief, you'll have more to laugh about here. In the days of "Die Hard" and similar excesses this is hardly surprising. "Raiders" is one of my favourite films, but "Crystal Skull" left me quite cold. On the positive side, Harrison Ford does a good job and the special effects were good enough for me.
Go see it, by all means, if you're under 30 it will probably be your kind of movie. I was 29 when "Raiders" came out...
Cloverfield (2008)
Quite gripping and much better than I thought
I live in Thailand and caught the first show today. After all the hype I was pleasantly surprised. The story starts a bit slow, but the monster attack began before I got bored. The shaky camera work puts you in the middle of the action. Other than "The Blair Witch Project", to which this has been compared, the characters are sympathetic enough to make the story compelling. There's so much action that the movie seems to be much longer than the actual running time.
The monster design is fine, if not completely original, with flailing, spider- or crab-like legs. The "face" reminded me a little of Ray Harryhausen's Ymir. The beast has only one clear close-up shot near the end of the movie, but its massive body is glimpsed several times before. It looks very impressive. The small offspring or parasite monsters are barely glimpsed, but they are vicious.
No explanation is given about the monster's origin. The camera-bearing protagonists are all killed - no Hollywood ending for this movie.
Altogether a solid entertainment with a big potential for sequels. Also one of the best uses of surround sound ever.
Rak haeng Siam (2007)
Surprise - a good Thai gay-themed movie
I live in Bangkok and go to cinemas regularly. Beginning of November I saw the trailer for Rak haeng Siam - Love at Siam, referring to Siam Square in downtown Bangkok where major scenes of the movie were filmed. I thought it to be a regular teenage love story. I was in for a pleasant surprise. At its centre is nothing less than a gay love story between teenage boys, tastefully handled, with Thai cultural standards faithfully observed. Amazingly the final message is "It's OK to be gay." No kathoeys (Thai gay stereotypes who abound in local movies and on TV) in sight, just two regular schoolboys who happen to be gay.
Of course this movie is mainly for Thais. Non-Thai people will enjoy it more if their knowledge of Thai culture is up-to-date. The most amazing scene in the movie has the boys sharing a prolonged kiss, surely a first for Thai cinema. The reaction of the mostly teenage audience was worth the price of admission alone. The movie is still running at this time and seems to be critically successful, too.
I enjoyed it very much and don't hesitate to designate it as the best Thai movie of 2007.
Go see it if you are interested in Thailand and Thai culture. Definitely go see it if you are gay. You won't be disappointed.
Little Britain (2003)
Just plain reckless
The modern approach to making TV series and movies is very much in evidence here: hit them with all you've got and hope that it sticks. For "Little Britain" that means outrageous characters like the wheelchair-bound guy who really isn't, the adult guy who still loves being breast-fed by his mother or any female relative, the gay guy who prefers to think he's the only one in his village, cross-dressing men and frontal nudity galore. Running gags are repeated to the point of nausea (literally so in the case of the vomiting "lady"). The low-brow humour is only partially appealing. Hearing an old man talk about his experiences in mutual masturbation as a youth solicits laughter not because it's funny to hear, but because it's just plain outrageous. A complete lack of subtlety brings everything down.
The Monty Pythons had a policeman chasing them away when the sketch got too silly or the studio audience storm the stage when the gags got too tasteless - something that I sorely missed here. Not surprisingly, "Little Britain" has only about half the number of episodes that the Monty Python series had.
6 out of 10 for sheer recklessness - and not much else.
Dante's Cove (2004)
Guilty - yes! What pleasure?
Seriously, who watches this? I was coaxed into trying the "first season" (actually 2 feature length episodes) by my boyfriend. If you want something really stimulating, you know where to get it. If you want a well written gay series, turn to "Queer As Folk" (original or US). This mishmash of bad acting and plotting had me laughing out in disbelief when a major situation was shown a few minutes into the pilot. The "special" effects are unbelievably bad for a series that is supposed to deal with the supernatural.
This is being marketed as a "guilty pleasure". Well, they got half of that right...
300 (2006)
All style, no substance
When I noticed this movie on the release schedule I checked the plot and forgot about watching it immediately. No need for another lesson in ancient history. It should have stayed like that, but I was coaxed into watching it after all. I've since had a chance to take a look at the comic book and must say that if the intention of the filmmakers was to capture the comic's style they succeeded admirably. The story contains nothing that hasn't been told before. I won't even go into issues of warmongering and political correctness. Many pop-cultural events have been called "the ultimate triumph of style over substance". This movie takes the crown for now.
999-9999 (2003)
Thai slasher movie
This movie provides a Thai perspective of the slasher genre with a supernatural twist. While not very original, it is well made and suitable gory. It will not satisfy the die-hard gore hounds, but is recommended for anybody who's interested in modern Thai movie making. For a superior Thai take on this genre, try 303 Fear Faith Revenge (1998).
Diabolik (1968)
James Bond in reverse
There's style to spare in this excellent Mario Bava movie that I just watched for the first time in over 30 years. It's James Bond in reverse as the Italian comic book hero is brought to life. Everything clicks, from the great special effects and humour to scientifically correct use of physics. Great Ennio Morricone score that deserves a CD release. Not a 60s time capsule but as entertaining now as it was then.
Arabian Nights (2000)
Typical TV treatment
Leave it to US TV to take a centuries old collection of tales of action, erotica, fantasy and humour and give it the most wooden treatment so far. You know you're in trouble when even the basic premise is modified, supposedly to suit a modern audience, thereby taking away all significance of the original tales. Ill attempts at slapstick humour serve no purpose, loosing all the humour of the originals. Only the good locations, sets and special effects save it from being completely awful. Better read the tales, preferably in Sir Richard Burton's classic translation.
Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)
Average Star Trek
The running gag about odd-numbered Star Trek movies being the worst proves true once again. This entry ranks between Star Trek 5 and 7 in my book. The average story line includes little or no character development for the crew we all know and love and some clumsy attempts at humor. Excellent score by Jerry Goldsmith, though.
The Mummy (1999)
Average entertainment
The Karl Freund classic has been remade as a movie that is more Indiana Jones than horror. A distinctly juvenile approach definitely ruins this for fans of horror movies. What is left is just an average adventure film. Excellent Jerry Goldsmith score, though. The state-of-the-art sound mix and special effects make it enjoyable for Dolby Surround addicts and sfx fans.
Tokyo Fist (1995)
Dynamic and unique
For people who are interested in Japanese culture and the Japanese way of thinking, movies are a good opportunity to learn about both. Don't start with this one, though! I suggest that you already have a certain knowledge about Japan and are accustomed to Eastern style sex and violence in movies before you see "Tokyo Fist". If you are ready to see it, a dynamic and unique movie from the director of "Tetsuo / Tetsuo 2" awaits you.
The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Fairly original, but uninvolving
Having seen this movie after hearing so much about it I cannot be but disappointed. While the plot is fairly original and the film is atmospheric I find it impossible to relate to or sympathise with the characters. It is clear that this film appeals to a younger American movie audience, but I suspect older Europeans like me might not be that keen about it, even if they are horror film fans (and I am).
The X Files (1998)
An experience for fans only?
The first entry in a sure franchise of X-Files films plays like a long episode of the TV series, with the main attraction the big budget production values, special effects and Academy Award-worthy sound. The fan gets all the expected intrigue, some explanation of the long-running conspiracy (or maybe not?) and Mulder-Scully chemistry, sprinkled with some irritating bits, the most annoying of which is cutting off their long anticipated first kiss by a contrived plot device. All-in-all a must for fans, but not for everybody.