Van Wilder (2002)
Daniel Cosgrove: Richard Bagg
Photos
Quotes
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Richard : Mr. Wilder here is quite the collegian. He's in his, what? sixth year?
Van Wilder : Actually, its lucky number seven.
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Richard : Oh, Gwen! Your labia feels so good around my swollen phallus! Oh! Oh! Oh, I'm fairly confident I'm going to ejaculate. I'm releasing some of my seminal fluids inside of you now!
[grunts and giggles]
Gwen : Are you okay?
Richard : Yeah. Why? Well, didn't you?
Gwen : Well, it's kind of hard in 15 seconds.
Richard : Damn it, Gwen! You know the kind of pressure I'm under with my exams.
Gwen : I'm sorry.
Richard : Look, I'm sorry. This semester's marks could determine in the next 10 years of our lives together. Do you realize that?
Gwen : You know... you shouldn't take life too seriously. You'll never get out alive.
Richard : [laughs] What the hell is that supposed to mean? I'm late for my study group.
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Richard : You're going to miss the biggest party of the year!
[Crickets chirp]
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Van Wilder : Whoa, trick or treat. What's going on?
Richard : This vaginal discharge won't let us partake in the party.
Van Wilder : Graphic.
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Richard : Gwen, what are you doing here?
Van Wilder : You two know each other?
Richard : That's my girlfriend, gluteus erecti.
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Richard : You do not call her that, Gonad!
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Richard : How bad do you want to be a Delta? Would you stand on broken glass? Let the shards into your Archilles tendon, causing acute achondroplasia, which could lead to non-congenital dwarfism as you got older?
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[while having sex with Jeannie]
Richard : P.S. Shut the fuck up!