Boy Meets World (1993–2000)

Ben Savage: Cory Matthews, Ben Sandwich, Rory, Self

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Quotes 

• Cory : Mom, Listen, I haven't been together with Topanga for twenty-two years, but we *have* been together for sixteen. 'Kay, that's a lot longer than most couples have been together. I mean, when we were born, you told me that we used to take walks in our strollers together in the park. When we were two, we were best friends, I mean, I, I knew everything about this girl. I knew her favorite color. I knew her favorite food. Then we became six, you know, and Eric made fun of me because it wasn't cool to have a best friend that was a girl or even know a girl, so for the next seven years I threw dirt at her. I like to call those "the lost years". Then when I was thirteen, Mom, she put me up against my locker and she kissed me. I mean, she gave me my first kiss. She taught me how to dance. She was always talking about these crazy things and I never understood a word she said. All I understood was that she was the girl I sat up every night thinking about, and when I'm with her I feel happy to be alive. Like I can do anything. Even talk to you like this. So that's, that's what I feel is love, Mom... When I'm better because she's here... and now she won't be. So we're finished.

• Shawn Hunter : [Cory and Shawn are discussing Cory and Topanga's recent breakup]  Cory, Topanga went out with another guy last night. I'm really sorry, man.

  Cory : So we're the only two people in the world who still have hope for Topanga and me, and you're throwing in the towel?

  Shawn Hunter : [nods]  Sorry, Cory.

  Cory : All right.

  [turns away] 

  Shawn Hunter : You okay?

  Cory : Yeah, sure. It's a strange feeling, though.

  Shawn Hunter : What, knowing that it's finally over between you and Topanga?

  Cory : [turns back to face Shawn]  No, being the only one who knows it's not.

• Cory : It's hard to imagine you as a boy. Did your parents call you Mr. Feeny?

• Topanga : I wasn't sure this day would ever come, but you were. I wasn't sure love could survive everything we put it through, but you were. You were always strong and always sure. And now I know I want you to stand beside me for the rest of my life. That's what I'm sure of.

  Cory : I have to talk to her now, OK.

  [to Shawn] 

  Shawn Hunter : Go ahead.

  Cory : Ever since I was young I never understood anything about the world, and I never understood anything that happened in my life. The only thing that ever made sense to me was you, and how I felt about you. That's all I've ever known and that's enough, that's enough for me, for the rest of my life. Topanga, we gonna get married?

  Topanga : Yea, we are.

  Cory : Good, cause, umm I have these rings... I love you, Topanga.

  Topanga : I love you too, Cory.

• Morgan Matthews : Mommy, if my dolly's cold, can I put her in the toaster oven?

  Amy Matthews : No, honey. That would be a mistake.

  Morgan Matthews : Mommy?

  Amy Matthews : Yes?

  Morgan Matthews : I made a mistake.

  Amy Matthews : [runs over to toaster oven and pulls out doll]  Cory, didn't you smell that?

  Cory : Yeah, I just thought we were having plastic for dinner.

• Cory : You are going to learn something from life every day. And make mistakes. And you'll make good friends and Mr. Feeny will probably teach you every grade you're ever in. And maybe someday you'll fall in love with a woman as wonderful as Topanga. How would you like that?

  Joshua Matthews : Yeah.

  Cory : And be lucky enough to make a good friend as Shawn. How'd you like that?

  Joshua Matthews : Good.

  Cory : And when you're not a little boy anymore, when the world has taught you how to be a man... Then you'll still make mistakes. But your family, and all those good friends you've made along the way, will help you. And even though you'll think the world has gone out of it's way to teach you all the tough lessons, you'll realize that it's the same world that's given you your family and those friends, you you'll come to believe that no matter what happens, somehow the world will protect you, too. "Boy Meets World." Now I get it.

• [Cory and his mother are compromising] 

  Amy Matthews : Thirty minutes.

  Cory : Half an hour.

  Amy Matthews : Deal.

• Alan Matthews : Hey, son! How was your day?

  Cory : Fine.

  Alan Matthews : What'd you do in school?

  Cory : Nothing

  Alan Matthews : Hey, *hold on*! Wait there!

  Alan Matthews : You know, everyday I ask you, "What did you do?" and everyday you tell me "Nothing." Well, I'm tired of nothing. I mean we both know something happened in school today and I want to know what it is!

  Cory : I decided to be a girl.

  Alan Matthews : Well, you taught me a very valuable lesson there, son.

  Shawn Hunter : You know the book, "Black Like Me"?

  Amy Matthews : Sure, is that what you guys are reading in school?

  Alan Matthews : Don't ask questions, honey!

• Cory : She kissed me!

  Topanga : And you moved away? What did you do to stop it?

  Cory : You're right. I said, "Kiss me, baby-sweetie, kill the relationship with the person I care about more than anyone in the world, and make me miserable for the rest of my horrible life." That's what I said.

• Cory : It was raining... you had an umbrella... I grabbed it, stuffed it down your throat, and then I opened it. Shawn, I Mary Poppinsed ya.

• Amy Matthews : Apparently, Cory would rather listen to the game then try and understand the emotional content of Romeo & Juliet.

  Cory : Mom, I'm a kid. I don't understand the emotional content of Full House.

  Morgan Matthews : I do.

• Jack : She got sick and said that chicken soup would help her feel better. I told her it probably would. Then I went bowling.

  Eric : Guys, I've come to a conclusion: Men are idiots.

  Eric , Cory , Alan , Shawn Hunter , Mr. George Feeny , Jack : What?

  Eric : Wait! There's more! Men are big idiots.

  Eric , Cory , Alan , Shawn Hunter , Mr. George Feeny , Jack : Hmm... yeah.

• Cory : That's just what I want - to be Topanga's boyfriend. And then we can name our children Chewbacca and Plankton.

• Cory : Would you be my girlfriend?

  [Topanga kisses Cory] 

  Cory : Yes or no?

• Eric : See, duckies are good, cuz not only do they give you that non-threatening sense of security, but you can feed 'em crackers and you can ride 'em. See, duckies are the horsies of the ocean. No, I mean they are.

  Cory : Okay, someone explain to me about duckies before I hit him with a spoon.

  Amy Matthews : It's wallpaper.

  Topanga : It's adorable.

  Alan Matthews : It's for you room.

  Eric : DUCKIES RULE.

• Topanga : Cory, the worst thing that ever happened when we were kids was that your Pop-Tart fell on the ground.

  Cory : Yeah, and *you* convinced me to eat it. You said, "God made dirt, dirt won't hurt."

• Mr. George Feeny : Mr Matthews, what was I just talking aboout?

  Cory : [stutters]  Uhhh...

  Mr. George Feeny : Ok, Mr. Hunter, what was I just talking about?

  Shawn Hunter : President Roosevelt and the New Deal.

  Mr. George Feeny : [clutches heart]  O dear lord he's right.

  Shawn Hunter : Hey Mr. Feeny, it's been my answer for two years. It had to pay off sometime!

• [Cory rips the blanket off Topanga and Shawn] 

  Cory : Underpants.

  Shawn Hunter : I always sleep like this.

  Cory : Underpants.

  Shawn Hunter : Oh, here we go.

• Mr. Turner : Hunter, Matthews, stand up!

  Shawn : I didn't do it.

  Mr. Turner : Uh huh. Anyway, Hunter, who's your best friend?

  Shawn : Um... you are, sir!

  Mr. Turner : Good answer. Matthews, who's your best friend?

  Cory : Shawn is.

  Mr. Turner : And what would you do to someone who messes with your best friend?

  Cory : I'd kill him.

  Mr. Turner : And on that note, I'd like to introduce you to your new teacher and my friend Mr. Williams. So if any of you mess with him, I'll kill you.

• Cory : [about Topanga]  She goes away for the summer and comes back a woman.

  Shawn Hunter : Yeah. Kinda like Coach Franklin.

• Cory : Someday, Topanga's going to be a mother, and I'm going to be the father. Or, the uncle. Or, the way I'm going, the guy down the street with the binoculars.

• Mr. George Feeny : I, for example, have a young neighbor who sings along to his little sister's Barney records.

  Cory : You hear that?

• [Eric and Topanga have gone on a diet together, but are keeping it a secret; Cory thinks the reason Topanga is acting differently is that she's pregnant] 

  Eric : [to Topanga]  Look, in a few months, everything's gonna be back to normal, okay?

  Cory : All right, Eric. What's going on?

  Eric : Hey, Cor. You smell like chicken.

  Cory : Don't change the subject. I know Topanga confided in you. What did she tell you?

  Eric : She told me that she's in trouble and it's all your fault. Your waffles and butter did this to her.

  Cory : Why would Topanga confide in you instead of her own husband?

  Eric : Because she knew how you'd react.

  Cory : You mean like this?

  [screams] 

  Cory : My life is over!

  [back to normal voice] 

  Cory : Like that?

  Eric : That's why she came to me, okay? People like us have similar appetites, that's how we get into situations like this.

  Cory : You've been in this situation before?

  Eric : Yeah, on and off since high school.

  Cory : Do Mom and Dad know?

  Eric : Yeah, Mom and Dad know. Dad actually thinks it's kinda funny.

  [laughs] 

  Cory : Oh, no, Eric. There is nothing funny about this. Every day she gets bigger, my life gets a little more complicated.

  Eric : Your life? Is that all you can think about? What about Topanga, huh? What is she supposed to do? Her body's out of control and she has nowhere to turn! Look, if you can't be supportive then the best possible thing for you to do is just stay away from her. Just stay away from her!

  Cory : [hysterical]  I don't know what I should do!

  [both run away, in opposite directions] 

• Cory : I believe in love like I believe in God: you can't touch it, you can't see it, but you can feel its wrath.

  Shawn Hunter : And its goodness. You can feel love's goodness.

  Cory : I wouldn't know

• [trying to straighten Cory's hair] 

  Cory : Is this stuff supposed to be burning?

  Shawn Hunter : Why, is it burning?

  Cory : No, I was just trying to make conversation, because we don't get enough chances to talk any more.

• Cory : Mr. Feeny, under my desk is a key. It opens locker 703 in a Florida station. In there is all my homework from the past 5 years. I'm actually a wonderful student. I listen and I know everything.

  Mr. George Feeny : What's the capital of Montana?

  [pause] 

  Cory : You're not going to Florida, are you?

• [Cory tells Shawn and Topanga to go out on a date and they ask him why] 

  Cory : Because, if you don't, it's gonna haunt us for the rest of our lives.

  Topanga : Why does everything have to haunt us for the rest of our lives?

  Cory : Underpants.

• [Cory is hitch-hiking and an Amish man approaches in a carriage] 

  Amish Man : Hello, young man. Are you in need of a ride? I'm going to that farmhouse there.

  [he points] 

  Cory : That farmhouse there?

  [points] 

  Amish Man : That farmhouse there.

  [pointing] 

  Cory : Well, I'm going to Philadelphia.

  Amish Man : Well, I can take you as far as that farmhouse there.

  [points] 

  Cory : Yes, but, you see, I'm going to Philadelphia, so that really does me no good.

  Amish Man : That may be, but, my will is just and my heart is pure.

  [drives off] 

  Cory : ...Which also does me no good.

• Cory : Last night T.K. and me talked on the phone for two hours. That beats my previous time spent on the phone with a girl by like... two hours.

• Cory : Shawnzie?

  Shawn Hunter : Yessie?

• Cory : You get Feeny this year?

  Shawn : Yeah. You?

  Cory : Yeah. Which courses?

  Shawn : All of them.

  Cory : Yeah, me too.

• Amy Matthews : [to Alan]  You're grounded.

  Cory : Does that really work? Can she really ground you?

  Alan Matthews : In certain ways, yes.

• Cory : Look at me, I'm breakin' the law.

  [Sirens] 

  Cory : Well we all so that one coming.

• Cory : Eric?

  Eric : How did you find me?

  Cory : You live here.

• Cory : Where are you going?

  Topanga : With this outfit and this hair? Hello, buh-bye, I am SO at the mall.

• Cory : I miss Linda

  Shawn : Yeah, I miss Linda too... and Stacey.

  Cory : And Debbie.

  Shawn : Yeah, and Debbie.

  Cory : There is no Debbie!

  Shawn : Huh? Then how come I miss her so much?

  Cory : Because you're nuts!

• Topanga : Do you think this is funny?

  Cory : No, I think it's the opposite of funny. I think it's... wood.

• Eric : Guess who's got pictures of Cory running naked through the sprinkler?

  Cory : Eric, I was four.

  Eric : You were twelve.

  Cory : It was... refreshing.

• Cory : I never asked to be the man in this relationship.

• [on Cory's attempt to ask Topanga out] 

  Shawn Hunter : What did you do?

  Cory : I saluted her.

• Harley : Didn't I tell Frankie to dispose of you two?

  Cory : Yeah, and he did. He killed us. Big time.

  Shawn : And now we're the angels of ourselves.

  Cory : And now it's time for us to float away.

  Shawn : Float.

  Harley : Have either one of you angels seen my girl.

  Cory : You mean Gloria?

  Shawn : No, we haven't seen her.

  Cory : There's no reason for us to have seen her.

  Shawn : We were in the locker the WHOLE time.

  Harley : The whole time WHAT, boys?

  Cory : Come on, Shawn. Float.

• Cory : My name is Cory Matthews. I'm here with my lovely fiancée Topanga. Isn't she lovely?

  Stan : They are all lovely with the lights off.

  Cory : I wouldn't know sir.

  Stan : You're a virgin?

  Cory : I'm cursed.

• Eric : Nothing happened.

  Cory : Yeah, and it DIDN'T happen in Mom and Dad's bed. I have you. I have you by your ovaries.

• Cory : Mommy, its me, Cory! you used to wipe my tushy!

• Cory : An operation? Operations are bad. Do you remember our cat, Fluffy. He died during an operation.

  Eric : Cory, Fluffy fell out of a tree. They were trying to sew his head back on.

• Shawn Hunter : No kissy?

  Cory : Just talky.

• Cory : Listen, I want you to know that I am completely secure in our relationship, and if you want to spend your summer away at camp, I am totally okay with it.

  Topanga : That is so mature.

  Cory : 'cause I'm going with ya.

  Topanga : Cory, it's an all girls camp.

  Cory : What time's swim'n?

• Shawn Hunter : Mr. Feeny, I'm sure if you recall the pain of being stabbed in the back by a girlfriend.

  Topanga : I didn't stab him, he stabbed me.

  Cory : Oh, I'd stab myself before I'd stab you. Kenny, give me a pencil.

  Kenny : I don't have one!

• Miss Kelly : All right. The name of the place where the eggs are stored.

  Cory : What are... the gonads?

  Miss Kelly : No, sorry, I was looking for "What are the ovaries?"

  Cory : Oh, the o... yeah, I always mix those two up.

  Miss Kelly : Try not to; your future will be brighter. Can you tell us anything about ovulation or how pregnancy occurs?

  Cory : Well, the man's got the sperm and the woman's got the egg. Now, once a month an egg slides down the "Phillippine tube" towards the uterus.

  Cory : The first sperm to reach the egg wins. It gets a medal, it's born, ya name 'em "Cory", ya push 'em out the door, and nothing makes sense for the rest of his life.

  Miss Kelly : Well, congratulations; you seem to have a thorough understanding of the life cycle.

  Cory : Hey, I live it!

• Cory : I, Cory Matthews, am a PO-TAY-TO.

• [about to take a picture for the yearbook] 

  Eric : Dumped.

  Cory : Dumped.

  Shawn Hunter : Cheese.

• [Cory thinks he is turning into a werewolf] 

  Madame Mosbenskias : Come to me, Werewolf Boy.

  Cory : You know.

  Madame Mosbenskias : I know many things, I know you were bitten by a wolf.

  Cory : It's true.

  Madame Mosbenskias : I know you are now becoming a wolf.

  Cory : That's amazing.

  Madame Mosbenskias : I know you are recently divorced.

  Cory : What?

  Madame Mosbenskias : You're not Billy Joel?

  Cory : No.

  Madame Mosbenskias : Well, then, you're just a wolf.

• Shawn : Where do you think we stand?

  Cory : We're lowly, 7th grade sewer scum who name rats after ourselves to feel important.

  Shawn : And how do you feel about this?

  Cory : Better than the guys with no rats.

• Shawn : I can't believe it, Feeny locked us in.

  Cory : He can't do that. It's against the Geneva Detention Convention.

• Cory : Did you guys see Feeny out there?

  Eric : Nope, not a sole, actually it was kinda creepy.

  Topanga : Why Creepy? Why is it creepy? Why did you say creepy? Why creepy?

• Shawn : Cory, I have got something incredible to tell you. But for security reasons, I am going to use our code.

  Cory : Well, we don't have a code, Shawn.

  Shawn : Really? Guys like us should have a code.

  Cory : Well, you know, we'll bring that up at the next meeting.

  Shawn : So when's our next meeting?

  Cory : Shawn, we don't have meetings!

  Shawn : This club blows!

• [after Topanga changes the rear-view mirror position while Cory drives and Cory makes her change it back] 

  Cory : Great! Now I can see if there are any cars coming up my crotch!

• Jonathan Turner : I carry this helmet to keep my head from going splat. Why do you carry that guitar case?

  Cory : To protect my sandwich

• Shawn Hunter : [Cory and Shawn imagine themselves as old men; they are in Chubby's]  So how long have you been married?

  Cory : What?

  Shawn Hunter : [louder]  How long you been married?

  Cory : Who?

  Shawn Hunter : [shouting]  How long you been married?

  Cory : They *want* you to take the rolls!

• Cory : There's no such thing as good news until I've had my Grape Nuts.

• Cory : We're gonna have a child? Wait, we've only kissed. I mean, I knew I was a good kisser, but *wow*.

• Cory : I accidently kissed Missy Robinson.

  Topanga : How do you accidently kiss someone? Did she slip on a rug, and your lips broke her fall?

• Shawn Hunter : Was it the dream with the dummy again?

  Cory : Yes... he was on foot... and he had a gun.

• Cory : Tell them how you got out of study hall.

  Larry : I told her I was training for the Olympic decathlon.

  Cory : And she believed you?

  Larry : She bought me a discus.

• Shawn Hunter : I need chocolate.

  Debbie : That's 16 grams of fat. And you have a purse.

  Shawn Hunter : Yeah, I do.

  Cory : That's not really his purse. He found that purse.

  Debbie : Well, he found an ugly one.

  Shawn Hunter : Hey. I happen to like this purse.

• Cory : A girl wrote seven numbers on my hand. What could this possibly mean?

  Shawn Hunter : It means, call her.

  Cory : Shawn, how could I call her when I don't even have her- Aahh.

• Cory : Shawn, I refuse to believe anything from those idiotic supermarket tabloids.

  Shawn Hunter : It's the New York Times, baby.

  Cory : The New York Times trailer park edition.

  Shawn Hunter : It's exactly the same thing, except you can eat it.

• Cory : So they got Hunter kidnapped, and handcuffed to a pole, and I have to step in and save Shawn's butt, because I have a way with women, as you can probably tell by the fact that I've never been more available in my life. Tickets go on sale at the box office.

• Cory : You see, my mom's mad at my dad because he got her a trash compactor for their anniversary.

  Harley : What a yutz.

  Gloria : Oh, yeah. That's a long way away from tires.

• Cory : Mom, did dad really promise to take you to Paris?

  Amy : Of course he did... just now.

• Cory : I'm telling you, that macaroni and cheese had more grease than Harley's hair.

  Shawn : I think that's how they made it, they just flipped him over and wrung him out. (they round the corner and see Harley who heard everything)

  Shawn and Cory : HARLEY.

• Eric : Done, Done, Done.

  Topanga : Enough already!

  Shawn Hunter : What, do we upset you?

  Topanga : Yes!

  Cory : Upset you enough to kill?

• Cory : I, I think that he knows we're too old for detention to scare us like it did when we were little kids right, so he's turned this school into a total chamber of horrors.

  Angela Moore : Doctor Feeny's house of terror.

• Topanga : What's he trying to teach us?

  Cory : To pay attention or we die.

• [Cory and Shawn have a band named The Exits] 

  Shawn : You know, there was one point there where I thought that we really had them. They were screaming EXITS! EXITS!

  Cory : Shawn, they were looking for a way out!

• Cory : [his grandma gets him a baseball card]  Where did you get this?

  Grandma Matthews : Where did I get it? I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die... Then, I pulled this card out of his cold, dead fingers... Or I bought it at a swap meet for six bucks, you make the call!

• Eric : Oh my God! He killed Kenny!

  Cory : We'll always know he was this tall.

• Cory : [after a date at a poetry reading]  I love poetry now! You know, I could be a poet: There once was a boy named Cory.

  Eric : Who now has an interesting story!

  Cory : He learned about kissin'...

  Eric : And all he was missin'...

  Shawn Hunter : When he and Topanga made out!

  Cory : [to Shawn]  Can you say summer school?

• [Cory, Topanga, Shawn, Angela, Eric, and Jack are trapped in the high school with a murderer. He has just now murdered Mr. Feeny. They are hiding in a classroom trying to figure out what to do next] 

  Topanga : Feeny's dead... Feeny's dead! Mr. Feeny is dead!

  Cory : Feeny can't die, how can Feeny die?

  Shawn Hunter : He was the first suspect. It's my fault, the second I suspected him, I signed his death warrant.

  Angela : Well, is any one of us safe?

  Shawn Hunter : Yeah, virgins. Virgins never die.

  Cory : All right!

  [to Topanga] 

  Cory : Thanks for saving me.

  Eric : [happily]  I'm dead!

  Jack : I'm dead.

  Shawn Hunter : I'll get as sick as you can get without actually... dying.

  Angela : Feeny, he's dead.

  [Eric and Shawn lock eyes, thinking the exact same thing] 

  Eric : All right!

  Shawn Hunter , Eric : [cheering and signing]  Go, Feeny, go, Feeny, go...

  Cory : [annoyed]  Okay! Listen. As happy as I am for Feeny, I am scared to death here.

• Jonathan Turner : Anybody you like.

  Cory : Anybody?

  Jonathan Turner : Anybody.

  Cory : Absolutely anybody?

  Jonathan Turner : Absolutely anybody.

  Cory : I pick Shawn.

  Shawn Hunter : I pick Cory.

  Topanga : You know, you walked right into that.

  Jonathan Turner : I did, didn't I?

• [Eric returns from the future, where Cory is called Rory] 

  Eric : Rory?

  Cory : Reric?

• Topanga : We're supposed to see other people.

  Cory : I'm supposed to see other people, you're supposed to wait until I die.

• Shawn Hunter : I live in a trailer park.

  Cory : And what a trailer park. It's great. It's got a pool... when it rains.

• Lauren : Yes, sir, can I help you?

  Cory : I don't want to have feelings for another girl.

  Lauren : Neither do I.

• [it is Halloween at a yogurt parlor] 

  Cory : Got any special flavors?

  Cashier : Well, we've got Bucket of Blood, that's like Strawberry, and we've got Bucket of Guts, that's more or less Chocolate, and we've got Smashed and Severed Hair Steins, I don't recommend that.

  Cory : Can you mix the Blood, and the Guts?

  Cashier : All the time.

• [Cory and Topanga talking about their wedding and people in their family who died. Topanga says Nana Boo-Boo and Cory's crying] 

  Cory : Nana Boo-Boo!

  Cory : [stops and thinks about it] 

  Cory : Wait... is Nana Boo-boo dead?

  Topanga : No.

  Cory : Oh.

• Cory : Chickens in the hallway. Chickens in the hallway. Somebody must have let 'em loose as the official senior prank. Look at 'em. Look at 'em. Oh, look at the chickens. Oh my gosh, this is crazy. I wonder which crazy senior though this up, huh? This is nuts.

• [Alan's yelling at Shawn per his request for getting drunk] 

  Alan : Someday you're gonna want to buy a house and you're gonna come to me.

  Cory : I think this is about us.

  Topanga : Nice touch.

• Cory : In some countries me calling your hair greasy would be considered a compliment. For instance... Greece.

  Gloria : That's funny.

  Harley : Yeah, he's a pretty funny guy.

  Cory : So, I get to live, huh?

  Harley : There's that humor again. I will miss that.

• [after Cory mocks him] 

  Mr. George Feeny : Mr. Matthews, when one mocks someone, one should wait until they're not looking right at them.

  Cory : But I'm not in my regular seat.

• [a depressed Cory uses handkerchiefs] 

  Shawn : Who carries these things around? What did you do, dig up your grandfather and pick his pocket?

  [in tears] 

  Cory : Grandpa Poppy... He always had seeds in his teeth... And that's why we called him Poppy...

• Cory : Richard and Cindy?

  Shawn : Very deeply in love.

  Cory : Since when?

  Shawn : Lunch.

  Cory : What did they eat?

  Shawn : I don't know, but it doesn't look like it was enough.

• Cory : So, do you know what the best part of being a virgin is?

  Shawn Hunter : What?

  Cory : No, I'm asking.

• Cory : [remarking on how he can't learn geography because it keep changing]  Why can't geography be like history? We always win World War Two, Lincoln always gets shot...

  Mr. George Feeny : Lincoln got off easy.

• Cory : You gave me bad advise in a dream!

  Mr. George Feeny : I'm not responsible for dream Feeny!

• Cory : I'm thinking of becoming a poet. There once was a boy named Cory...

  Eric : Who has an interesting story...

  Cory : He learned about kissing...

  Eric : And all he was missing...

  Shawn Hunter : When he and Topanga made out!

  Cory : [to Shawn]  Can you say, "Summer school?"

• [Eric is reading a ltter from Cory] 

  Cory : [voiceover]  Dear Eric, You think I'm safe. Well, I'm not. I'm dangerous. I'm going to the amusement park with Mr. Feeny.

  Eric : [stops reading]  With Mr. Feeny?

  [continues] 

  Cory : Yes, with Mr. Feeny.

• Cory : [On a road trip with Eric, wanting to go home]  I want to go home and here's why, I'm completely out of clean underwear.

  Eric : Big deal. I ran out a week ago. I'm sittin' pretty.

  Cory : I don't know if you've noticed, but I've also run out of pants.

  Eric : [Looks]  Ahhh!

  Cory : I wanna go home!

  Eric : I want you in pants!

• Cory : [in the principal's office]  Now my name is Johnny Baboon, at least my life can't get any worse

  Mr. George Feeny : [turns from his desk chair]  Wrong again... Mr. Baboon

  Cory : MR. FEENY!

  Mr. George Feeny : The legend continues

  Cory : How can this be, you're only temporary right, you don't have the full authority to authorize detention or caning, right?

  Mr. George Feeny : Oh, the school board and its infinite wisdom has been set to give me full authority

• Cory : So, what's it like to have that kind of money?

  Jack : ...Good

• [Cory loses a geography bee] 

  Cory : I'm hitting my head. I'm hitting the northern-most part of my head.

• [Cory is trying to find a topic to talk about on his radio show] 

  Cory : There's a dark side to a bake sale too, isn't there? Fat. Cholesterol. What about that?

• Shawn Hunter : Remember the goldfish I used to have?

  Cory : The turtle?

• Cory : When I'm here with you, I'm fine, but over there with Topanga it's like I'm a... a... a sea monkey.

  Shawn Hunter : That's a bad animal.

• Shawn Hunter : Where were you?

  Cory : [whispering]  There was a Fortune Teller at the yogurt parlor.

  Shawn Hunter : You tortured a feller named Yogi Tyler?

  Cory : ...Yeah.

• Eric : Where's my lucky tube socks?

  Cory : [holding up two very tiny socks]  I don't think they're so lucky anymore.

• Topanga : What's wrong?

  Cory : My hosiery is still bunching.

• Dr. Feldspar : Is there a history of mental illness in the family?

  Cory : My uncle Morrie thinks he's Sammy Sosa.

• Alan Matthews : Maybe we should try thinking.

  Cory : No, me and Shawn have already tried that. It doesn't work.

  Alan Matthews : Maybe we should try listening to them.

  [beat] 

  Alan Matthews : [Everyone laughs] 

  Eric : Maybe we should try Cory's thinking thing again.

• Cory : Sometimes I can't hold my breath long enough to get down to where Mr. Feeny likes to swim.

• [after Shawn can't find his real mom] 

  Topanga : Cory... what do you think he's gonna do?

  Cory : Probably something that's gonna devastate him as well as all of us.

  Angela : The usual.

• Clerk [played by John Balma] : Name?

  Cory : Why? I- I, mean, w- why do you need that?

  Clerk : Just need a name to put in the computer, any name. Any name will do.

  Cory : Oh, this is silly. You must go through this all the time. I'll just, I'll give you my real name. It's, It's Don. Don Quixote. That's me.

  Clerk : That's new. Address?

  Cory : 1414 Bella, Mancha.

• Shawn Hunter : Angela, are you sick of screaming yet?

  [Angela nods] 

  Shawn Hunter : Then you'd better not look in there.

  [indicates the trash can holding the murdered janitor] 

  Cory : [peering into the trash can]  Oh my God!

  [beat] 

  Cory : There's like a hundred retainers in there!

• Jack : She doesn't look like the killer type to me.

  Cory : Me neither, I am however less sure about Eric.

• Cory : But you see, Shawn, that was a cartoon. Time was compressed, we're real, we're in real time.

  Shawn : Trust me, it's the same thing.

  Cory : No, no it's not. You see, a television show can cover many days in only one "half an hour" program.

  Shawn : Trust me, it's the same thing.

• Topanga : I mean, don't you find it... sexy, Cory?

  Cory : "Cory" and "sexy" in the same sentence.

  [chuckles] 

  Cory : Weh-heh-hell, I do believe your resolve is weakening, my little kumquat.

• Cory : [discussing Cory and Topanga's breakup, and that Topanga went out with another guy the night before. Shawn has lost hope for the relationship]  So we're the only two guys in the world who think there's still hope for Topanga and me, and you're throwing in the towel?

  Shawn Hunter : [nods]  Yeah.

  Cory : Okay, all right.

  [turns away] 

  Shawn Hunter : You okay?

  Cory : Yeah, sure. It's a strange feeling though.

  Cory : What, that it's finally over between you and Topanga?

  Cory : [turns back to face Shawn]  No, being the only person who knows it's not.

• Cory : [talking to Topanga, who is considering calling off their wedding because her parents divorced]  If every marriage failed except one, I guarantee you that one would be ours.

• Cory : What if he's just like Feeny, only... Feenier?

• Cory : My dad's a grocer. I'm a grocer's son. I'm a son-of-a-grocer!

• Cory : Look for the union label, is anybody behind me, my Shawn?

• Cory : I'm eleven years old. Come on, I'm on a schedule here.

• Cory : Is it just me or does anyone else wanna hurl from boredom?"

• [after Topanga decided at the last minute to not marry Cory, by not saying "I do."] 

  Topanga : I don't know what to say.

  Cory : "Do". You know, "do"? It's the first half of your favorite word, "don't".

• Cory : His name is Lianol, we met today and we are getting along just fabulously. Because I'm young Hunter, I'm vital and I have a lot to offer.

• [Cory thinks he is turning into a werewolf] 

  Shawn Hunter : Come on, you couldn't have been bitten by a wolf.

  Cory : Shawn, look at the bite.

  Shawn Hunter : I don't see anything.

  Cory : Of course you don't. Everybody knows werewolf bites heal overnight.

  Shawn Hunter : Wow. Then, you're covered with them.

• Radio : Well, the search for the missing wolf continues, and with the day being Halloween, we've been receiving prank calls of reports of wolves and even werewolves.

  Cory : Werewolves, isn't that silly?

  [sees the cashier's face] 

  Cory : Isn't it?

  Cashier : There are things, and then there are *things*.

  Cory : You mean... There are things such as werewolves?

  Cashier : There are places were such things are revealed. For five dollars complete.

• [Cory is in the hospital, and is under anesthesia] 

  Cory : I'll have the soup. What are you going to have King Louis?

• Mr. George Feeny : Well Mr. Matthews, why don't we treat this little rendezvous as a dress rehersal for the many visits we'll endoubtly have this year.

  Cory : Huh?

  Mr. George Feeny : Get out of my face.

  Cory : Sure, my next class is American History with Mr, Um... Feeny... Mr... Fay... ayy

  [the bell rings] 

  Mr. George Feeny : You're late!

• Cory : I'm gonna be unstoppable.