Kong Island (1968)
3/10
There is no Kong. There is no island.
8 November 2023
Warning: Spoilers
I love this movie because I know that it upset people so much. It was titled King of Kong Island and there's no King Kong, there's barely an island and it's so Italian that you know that I was yelling things in pure joy throughout the entire movie. Eva, la Venere selvaggia didn't even know that in America people expected it to be something it couldn't be.

Albert Muller (Marc Lawrence, the man who would make Pigs) is putting radios into the heads of gorillas to control them. These apes kidnap Diana (Ursula Davis, An Angel for Satan, Crypt of the Vampire) and Burt Dawson (Brad Harris) attempts to save her before being abducted by natives who are led by a white girl because that's how movies work.

She's Eva (Esmeralda Barros, God Is My Colt 45) and she doesn't fall in love with Burt. No, she's just kind of there. He's into Diana. I'm also making this sound way more action-filled than it is because it's packed with long moments of talking yet the beat up print and fuzzy noises that approximate a soundtrack on the Mill Creek box set that I viewed this on made me feel like I was lying in a sleeping bag with my feet under a warm old Zenith TV as a kid and I had no responsibility or anywhere to be.

Director Roberto Mauri also made He Was Called Holy Ghost.
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