If I had a dollar for every time someone friend requested me on Goodreads because of my gender ("a guy who reads? wow!") I would probably have enough If I had a dollar for every time someone friend requested me on Goodreads because of my gender ("a guy who reads? wow!") I would probably have enough money to buy a new Kindle. As a male who loves books and aims for a career in clinical/counseling psychology - a more and more female-dominated field - part of me has always wondered whether I just lack the typical "male" brain. Are girls biologically geared toward the humanities and males toward the hard sciences? Do women really empathize more than men because of their brain chemistry?
Cordelia Fine offers a clear answer: no. In Delusions of Gender, she unravels the myth that we can chalk up gender differences to our neurology. With a keen and unrelenting eye, she examines scientific theories and misconceptions, like the role testosterone plays in the fetus. She dedicates a large portion of the book to knocking down neurosexism. In recent years several individuals have boasted about experiments that use fMRI and PET scans to detect differences in the brain; Fine makes sure to reveal the flaws associated with those studies and why we should be skeptical of the conclusions they espouse.
Instead of relying on faulty science, Fine approaches gender differences from a psychological and sociological perspective. As a psychology major, I loved her incorporation of self-fulfilling prophecy and stereotype threat, such as including a study about how women who had to check a gender box (either "male" or "female") performed worse on an exam than women who took the test without marking their gender. The section about gender-neutral parenting stood out to me too. It's not enough to just offer our children toys stereotypically associated with the opposing gender, especially when gender distinctions arise so soon.
Highly recommended for those interested in feminism, neuroscience, psychology, or gender studies. In contemporary society we often cling to claims made by people with scientific backgrounds, even though some of those claims have no legitimate support. I didn't go into too much depth about all of Fine's arguments in this review, but she invested a laudable amount of effort into Delusions of Gender: the book has about 100 pages of citations, and her writing conveys her passion as well....more
If you care about feminism, social justice, or making the world a better place in any way at all, you must read this book. Sister Outsider shook me toIf you care about feminism, social justice, or making the world a better place in any way at all, you must read this book. Sister Outsider shook me to my core. Audre Lorde's brilliant, powerful, love-filled writing literally brought me to tears in a local Panera Bread. In this stunning collection of essays and speeches, she addresses the sheer necessity of intersectional feminism and supporting women of color, the importance of using our voices to speak up against injustice, the horrors inflicted by US imperialism and capitalism, and more. I knew about halfway through reading this book that it would serve as one of my absolute favorite reads and feminist works of all time. I marked several passages from each essay, so I wish I could share so many of them in this review, but for the sake of brevity, first, an iconic passage about how we must stand in solidarity with everyone who faces oppression, not just those who look like us:
"I am a lesbian woman of Color whose children eat regularly because I work in a university. If their full bellies make me fail to recognize my commonality with a woman of Color whose children do not eat because she cannot find work, or who has no children because her insides are rotted from home abortions and sterilization; if I fail to recognize the lesbian who chooses not to have children, the woman who remains closeted because her homophobic community is her only life support, the woman who chooses silence instead of another death, the woman who is terrified lest my anger trigger the explosion of hers; if I fail to recognize them as other faces of myself, then I am contributing not only to each of their oppressions but also to my own, and the anger which stands between us then must be used for clarity and mutual empowerment, not for evasion by guilt or for further separation. I am not free while any woman is unfree, even when her shackles are very different from my own. And I am not free as long as one person of Color remains chained. Nor is any one of you."
Let me just tell you some of the glorious feats Lorde accomplishes in this collection. She rightfully calls out white women for their racism and upholding of patriarchy, black men for their misogyny and homophobia, and all of us for the oppression we internalize and project onto others. She reclaims female sexuality as a weapon against patriarchy and for self-love. She centers the experiences of black women, including lesbian black women, with no apologies. Lorde does all of this and more with a voice that is wise, soulful, commanding, and kind, somehow all at once. Her writing acts as both a sword and a salve, tearing through layers and layers of racism, sexism, and discrimination while offering a healing path for us to follow. Another passage I love, this one about the importance of feeling, a trait that is undervalued in a male-dominated society:
"For within living structures defined by profit, by linear power, by institutional dehumanization, our feelings were not meant to survive. Kept around as unavoidable adjuncts or pleasant pastimes, feelings were expected to kneel to thought as women were expected to kneel to men. But women have survived. As poets. And there are no new pains. We have felt them all already. We have hidden that fact in the same place where we have hidden our power. They surface in our dreams, and it is our dreams that point the way to freedom. Those dreams are made realizable through our poems that give us the strength and courage to see, to speak and to dare... For there are no new ideas. There are only new ways of making them felt - of examining what those ideas feel like being lived on Sunday morning at 7 A.M., after brunch, during wild love, making war, giving birth, mourning our dead - while we suffer the old longings, battle the old warnings and fears of being silent and impotent and alone, while we taste new possibilities and strengths."
It is a true tragedy that Lorde is not required reading for everyone, everywhere. At the same time, I feel so grateful for Lorde's revelatory ideas and her beautiful delivery. As a beginning therapist, I believe it is of utmost importance to both honor our emotions and change our actions to better our mental health, all while working toward social justice. Lorde accomplishes all of these things. She sits with the dark, destructive emotions brought on by experiencing racism and prejudice, while celebrating the joyful feelings of black lesbian womanhood and of liberation overall. In addition, she provides tangible strategies to fight for a better, more just and loving world. I cannot praise this collection enough. I will just say that it is one of my favorite books ever and please please read it. I will end this review with one more quote that exemplifies her penchant for calling us to action:
"How are you practicing what you preach - whatever you preach, and who exactly is listening? As Malcolm stressed, we are not responsible for our oppression, but we must be responsible for our own liberation. It is not going to be easy but we have what we learned and what we have been given that is useful. We have the power those who came before us have given us, to move beyond the place they were standing. We have the trees, and water, and sun, and our children. Malcolm X does not live in the dry texts of his words as we read them; he lives in the energy we generate and use to move along the visions we share with him. We are making the future as well as bonding to survive the enormous pressures of the present, and that is what it means to be a part of history."...more
Another work of nonfiction with several quote-worthy passages. In The Purity Myth, Jessica Valenti argues that America's obsession with virginity hurtAnother work of nonfiction with several quote-worthy passages. In The Purity Myth, Jessica Valenti argues that America's obsession with virginity hurts young women. She focuses on the idea that if we teach girls to value themselves in terms of their bodies, they will fail to cultivate true virtues: intelligence, assiduousness, and compassion.
The desirable virgin is sexy but not sexual. She's young, white, and skinny. She's a cheerleader, a baby sitter; she's accessible and eager to please (remember those ethics of passivity!). She's never a woman of color. She's never a low-income girl or a fat girl. She's never disabled. "Virgin" is a designation for those who meet a certain standard of what women, especially younger women, are supposed to look like. As for how these young women are supposed to act? A blank slate is best.
Valenti discusses purity in several different contexts, including the intersection of purity and poverty, the damaging effects of abstinence-only education, and the harmful attitudes created by gender stereotypes. Even though some of her material might appear like old news, she includes a good amount of statistics and ties all of her points back to her overarching argument. Her writing style, while snarky at times, conveys information with conciseness and directness.
What's funny is that that statement essentially echoes the same hope I have for women: that we can start to see ourselves - and encourage men to see us - as more than just the sum of our sexual parts: not as virgins or whores, as mothers or girlfriends, or as existing only in relation to men, but as people with independent desires, hopes, and abilities. But I know that this can't happen so long as American culture continues to inundate us with gender-role messages that place everyone - men and women - in an unnatural hierarchical order that's impossible to maintain without strife. For women to move forward, and for men to break free, we need to overcome the masculinity status quo - together.
Valenti could have taken her analysis of purity a little further in certain parts of the book. Still, I give The Purity Myth five stars because it accomplishes what I think nonfiction should accomplish: it sets out a thoughtful argument and defends it with clear writing and lots of evidence. In the last section of the book Valenti calls readers to action as well, encouraging them to blog or attend local conferences or just educate themselves about feminism and the virginity movement. Overall, I would recommend The Purity Myth to anyone interested in feminism, the idea of purity in contemporary society, or gender roles....more
A great book about deconstructing the myth of beauty and recognizing how patriarchy emphasizes our appearances to harm us all. Published in 1990, The A great book about deconstructing the myth of beauty and recognizing how patriarchy emphasizes our appearances to harm us all. Published in 1990, The Beauty Myth came out ahead of its time, as Naomi Wolf rails against the thin ideal, how companies lure women into buying products by making them feel insecure about their bodies, ageism, and so much more. I feel glad that more and more people talk nowadays about the cruelty of beauty standards and how we can love ourselves for more than how we look. Wolf articulates this message with an extra edge of feminist politics, and I appreciate her fiery demand that we free women from the capitalist and sexist notion that their self-worth comes from the external beauty of their bodies, instead of the radiance of their hearts.
Overall, a good read I would recommend to those interested in body image, feminism, and the intersections of politics and appearances. Wolf does neglect the experiences of women of color, and her writing sometimes drags, so The Beauty Myth does have its limits. However, the book has contributed to the feminist movement in important ways, so I still give it four stars. I will end this review with a quote I really appreciated from the end of the book:
"How to begin? Let's be shameless. Be greedy. Pursue pleasure. Avoid pain. Wear and touch and eat and drink what we feel like. Tolerate other women's choices. Seek out the sex we want and fight fiercely against the sex we do not want. Choose our own causes. And once we break through and change the rules so our sense of our own beauty cannot be shaken, sing that beauty and dress it up and flaunt it and revel in it: In a sensual politics, female is beautiful."...more
I picked this book up because I had felt overwhelmed as of late due to my commitments as a full-time student at one of the most intense colle3.5 stars
I picked this book up because I had felt overwhelmed as of late due to my commitments as a full-time student at one of the most intense colleges in the country. A few pages in, I realized that I had it lucky, with my two jobs and my classes and my club activities; at least I did not have diapers to change or a family to take care of while working my jobs. In Overwhelmed, Brigid Schulte nails down how society constructs myths of the "ideal worker" and the "ideal mother," and she analyzes how these unrealistic models reduce productivity and siphon our time and our strength.
Schulte does a deft job of pulling together personal anecdote, research, and her own compelling arguments to highlight how American society spends so much time prepping for the future, worrying about work, and forcing ourselves into unbearable standards that we squander the present. She interviews professors, psychiatrists, and other professionals from various universities and fields. She travels to cities and countries such as Paris and Denmark to compare how they approach work, love, and play in comparison to the US. As an award-winning journalist from the Washington Post, Schulte knows how to research and write authoritative yet digestible nonfiction; she explains why we need to rethink time, gender, and work while supporting her claims with an amalgamation of sources.
While she packs in a lot of lessons in this book, one that stands out to me centers on the all-too-known-yet-ignored idea of living in the present. I feel like we hear that message and think "yep, gotta live in the present, will do" before jumping into our next activity, submerging ourselves in what Schulte calls "the overwhelm." By reading Overwhelmed and receiving that message over and over - that we must cherish our time and truly live in the present - backed up by research spanning science, sociology, and more, I hope we all progress in our paths to time serenity.
Two questions nagged at me while I read this, the first pertaining to the diversity of the people featured in the book. While Schulte devotes a little bit of time to nonwhite, non-straight individuals, for the most part Overwhelmed revolves around white, straight people, and I would have appreciated her making certain sections more concise to feature a wider pool of individuals. Also, this book focuses the middle to upper-middle class: what do the people do who cannot afford to take time off for themselves amidst struggling to support their families? I would have liked to see more challenging, divergent solutions for people of all socioeconomic brackets, not just those who can make the conscious decision to play more without suffering severe consequences.
Overall, a read I would recommend to those interested in time management or to those feeling overwhelmed in their own lives, especially to women who have kids. An intriguing work of nonfiction that I can only hope will become less relevant over time....more
Originally published in 1963, The Bell Jar must have been revolutionary for its time. A well-educated and witty young woman by the name of Esther GreeOriginally published in 1963, The Bell Jar must have been revolutionary for its time. A well-educated and witty young woman by the name of Esther Greenwood descends into depression after moving to New York. Along the way, she rejects the advances of male suitors, and as she spirals further and further out of control, she lampoons society's constructions of gender as well as the use of shock therapy within the mental health system. Her narrative flows in and out of time, pushing us forward and backward amidst her struggle to stay afloat in a sea of melancholy.
The Bell Jar raises questions still relevant today. It asks us to examine the intersection between feminism and psychology, such as how the confinement of women damages their mental health. Sylvia Plath provides us with a voice that is not altogether likeable, but relatable enough to sympathize and empathize with. I feel like all readers will react to Esther differently - some with indifference, some with a strong sense of solidarity, and others maybe an outward dislike. Still, I would recommend The Bell Jar to anyone interested in the subjects of feminism or psychology, because it delves into both in a time period that we might not all be familiar with....more
I first fanboy squealed on page 11, when Judith Lewis Herman created a connection between mental illness and feminism, two of my favorite topics. In tI first fanboy squealed on page 11, when Judith Lewis Herman created a connection between mental illness and feminism, two of my favorite topics. In the first third of Trauma and Recovery, Herman discusses the history of trauma and how trauma relates to many other concepts, such as politics and warfare. In contemporary society people insulate and isolate the topic of mental illness with alarming speed, so delving into its pervasiveness in all areas of life brought its magnitude back into focus. Depression, for example, is not just an illness that affects people because they might feel sad out of the blue: depression and its symptoms have a rich history and an unfortunate stake in several domains.
Herman also writes in-depth about trauma itself, which made me love Trauma and Recovery, even as it tore me apart. With fluid and poignant prose, she sets forth a tripartite recovery model: establishing a safe environment for the victim, unearthing the trauma and working through its emotional wounds, and moving forward to maintain a new post-trauma life that expands upon the experiences of the victim. As someone who has dealt with trauma and wants to one day work as a therapist, this book resonated with me more than any textbook or piece of nonfiction I've ever read. Herman explains concepts with confidence and clarity, and her guiding tone shows that she empathizes with victims and wishes to support them throughout the recovery process.
So many little things added to my affection for Herman's most well-known work. As an English and Psychology double major, I felt joy every time she used books written by authors like Woolf and O'Brien to provide examples for psychological ideas. She drives home the idea that mental health and politics remain connected because mental health intrinsically relates to oppressed people and the blows they suffer. Herman ends the book by commenting on the influential role of therapists: not only do they help victims regain control of their lives, but they also act as witnesses to victims' stories. They testify to the truth, and they fight for the clients they work it, no matter what the cost.
Overall, an inspiring and enlightening read. Trauma and Recovery was published quite awhile ago, which shows through its use of gender pronouns (men are also abused, and women serve in the armed forces as well) but the book still raises a wealth of information and understanding. It has revitalized my passion for psychology and the field of mental illness, and I'm certain I will revisit it in the future.
By the middle of Appetites, I wanted to quote every single word Caroline Knapp wrote. In this memoir, she addresses three of my favorite topics: feminBy the middle of Appetites, I wanted to quote every single word Caroline Knapp wrote. In this memoir, she addresses three of my favorite topics: feminism, eating disorders, and sexuality. Knapp integrates these issues by sharing her own battle with anorexia and analyzing hunger through a psychological and sociocultural lens.
Knapp can write. Her writing style is so vivid, so passionate, and so powerful that you can't help but admire her strength, even as she exposes herself and makes herself vulnerable. She hones in on the idea of appetite and how women struggle to fulfill their varying hungers. By defining "appetite" early in the book, she strides forward and discusses how women's desires lead them to focus on pleasing men, how it causes people in contemporary society to value materials instead of themselves, and how the pressure to appease the patriarchy and its expectations can contribute to eating disorders. Here's a passage that pertains to internal and external satisfaction and how society shapes our perception of happiness:
If only we lived in a culture in which internal measures of satisfaction and success - a capacity for joy and caring, an ability to laugh, a sense of connection to others, a belief in social justice - were as highly valued as external measures. If only we lived in a culture that made ambition compatible with motherhood and family life, that presented models of women who were integrated and whole: strong, sexual, ambitious, cued into their own varied sources to explore all of them. If only women felt less isolated in their frustration and fatigue, less torn between competing hungers, less compelled to keep nine balls in the air at once, and less prone to blame themselves when those ball come crashing to the floor. If only we exercised our own power, which is considerable but woefully underused; if only we defined desire on our own terms.
Appetites isn't a memoir in the typical sense. Instead of centering the book on herself, Knapp supplements her analysis of feminism and eating disorders with anecdotes from her life. She uses her experiences as a springboard to discuss how anxious parenting styles can affect self-esteem, how emptiness or a need for control can lead to an eating disorder, and most importantly, how to heal from a war with one's own burning hungers.
Even though Knapp dives deeply into the intricacies of desire and how the world contorts our cravings against us, she ends Appetites on a hopeful note. She reveals how she used rowing to recuperate and how thinking about bigger issues lessened her self-absorption. While I would describe this book with words like painful, poignant, and piercing, I would also use words such as compelling, influential, and mind-changing. Here's a paragraph toward the end of the book that describes what really motivates our desires:
Being known. This, of course, is the goal, the agenda so carefully hidden it may be unknown even to the self. The cutter cuts to make the pain at her center visible. The anorexic starves to make manifest her hunger and vulnerability. The extremes announce, This is who I am, this is what I feel, this is what happens when I don't get what I need. In quadraphonic sound, they give voice to the most central human hunger, which is the desire to be recognized, to be known and loved because of, and in spite of, who you are; they give voice to the sorrow that takes root when that hunger is unsatisfied.
Highly, highly recommended for anyone even remotely interested in feminism, eating disorders, psychology, or sexuality. If I could I would buy anyone interested a copy of Appetites and send it straight to their home, because this is a book worth reading. Writing this review on my birthday is probably one of the greatest gifts I've experienced yet, and even though Caroline Knapp has passed away, I hope she knows just how much of an impact her ideas will have on society as time passes....more
Words I've lived by long before reading this book: Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon thWords I've lived by long before reading this book: Lock up your libraries if you like; but there is no gate, no lock, no bolt that you can set upon the freedom of my mind.
Oh, Virginia Woolf. A Room of One's Own is a masterpiece of argument and persuasion and feminism. Her ideas about women serving as the looking glass, her solid support of women having a fixed income and a room of their own, her refusal to care about anyone's perception of her, her references to Charlotte Bronte and Jane Austen, her appeal to women that they should not just hate each other for the sake of it - this entire book blew me away. I had to keep reminding myself that this was published in freaking 1929.
I don't usually curse, but for the majority of this essay, I was thinking damn the patriarchy. Damn all of society's constraints against minorities and free thinking. If you're a woman, or a man, or an alien, you should read this book. My main takeaway is that whenever I feel sad, or lonely, or lost, I will be thankful for my opportunities and abilities, and I will go out there and do something. Highly recommended....more
I liked that this book focused on a friendship between two Black women living in a conservative Midwestern town. Toni Morrison highlights the depth ofI liked that this book focused on a friendship between two Black women living in a conservative Midwestern town. Toni Morrison highlights the depth of friendship and the range of emotions it can elicit: connectedness and love, betrayal, sadness, wonder, grief, and more. There’s interesting commentary in the novel both about race as well as the centering of men and how men mistreat Black women for their own advantage. I found the novel a bit slight and wanted more depth or even scenes and content related to Sula and Nel’s friendship, however, I recognize the book’s importance in the literary canon....more
"There is a way that the men speak to women that reminds me too much of Pa. They listen just long enough to issue instructions. They don't even look a"There is a way that the men speak to women that reminds me too much of Pa. They listen just long enough to issue instructions. They don't even look at women when women are speaking. They look at the ground and bend their heads toward the ground. The women also do not "look in a man's face" as they say. To "look in a man's face" is a brazen thing to do. They look instead at his feet or his knees. And what can I say to this?"
What a sad and splendid book. The Color Purple tells the tale of 20 years of Celie's life through her letters. A poor black woman whose father abuses and rapes her at the age of 14, Celie soon loses her sister as well as her independence after marrying "Mister." Only by meeting Shug - the most fierce, unapologetic woman Celie's ever encountered - and learning the truth about her sister does Celie start to move toward her reawakening, her self-acceptance, and her love for even those who have hurt her.
Alice Walker delves into so many important issues in The Color Purple. Even though the book focuses on a black woman oppressed in the first half of the twentieth century, a myriad of the behaviors and themes found within the book still apply to all women today. Not only does Walker weave in timeless feminist ideas, she also relates Celie's struggle to domestic abuse, lgbtq culture, the strength of sisterhood, and so much more.
My favorite concept in The Color Purple was the use of storytelling as healing. Celie gives herself a voice by befriending Shug and eventually writing letters to Nettie, and even the epistolary format of the book exemplifies the power of writing, talking, and sharing one's struggles. Whether it's a veteran with PTSD sharing their story with a therapist or an angry teenager writing on their blog, human connection and communication poses so many benefits, and Walker's book highlights that in the most wonderful of ways.
Highly, highly recommended to anyone interested in feminism, historical fiction, overcoming abuse, or any intersection of those topics. Definitely a classic I wish more people read....more
In Female Chauvinist Pigs, Ariel Levy deconstructs the idea that sex always empowers women. She argues that the sexualization of women sets them back In Female Chauvinist Pigs, Ariel Levy deconstructs the idea that sex always empowers women. She argues that the sexualization of women sets them back in terms of equality and that they only hurt themselves by using their bodies as bargaining chips. For the sake of simplicity, I'll divide my review into the good, the bad, and the ugly.
The Good: Levy creates a compelling argument against overt female exhibitionism and sexuality. She interviews a variety of people - from businesswomen to sex workers - and through their stories she shows how raunch culture only appeases men, instead of freeing women. She incorporates interesting ideas like "tomming" (an allusion to Uncle Tom's Cabin), as well as how the sexual revolution movement coincided with and somewhat harmed the female liberation movement. Levy's overall analysis brought forth a few innovative concepts, such as teaching young girls why they should have sex instead of forbidding them from learning about what their bodies will push them toward anyway.
The Bad: Where are the solutions? Levy spends so much time lampooning women in this book that she fails to formulate a plan of action. She succeeds in saying that too much promiscuity harms women, but what can we do to empower them? Perhaps Female Chauvinist Pigs would have benefited from more analysis instead of the multitude of interviews Levy included: a few of her interviews felt biased and unnecessary, and she could have spent more time talking to empowered, successful women instead of the ones she found lacking.
The Ugly: Did anyone else find Levy's sentiments about transgender people horribly offensive? Her idea that trans men choose their transition for the political, financial, and social advantages made me sick. How can anyone generalize why people spend hundreds and hundreds of dollars, go through countless surgeries, and face discrimination in order to attain their true gender? How can anyone call it a "choice" in the first place? Levy made some stretches in this book based on her interviews, but her politicizing of an entire group of human beings made me outright upset.
Overall, a good read, especially for those who haven't read much about feminism. I had fun discussing this book with a friend, and, alongside Appetites by Caroline Knapp, it's inspired me to read more books about feminism in the future.
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