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This Common Secret: My Journey as an Abortion Doctor
A brave account of the social and political forces that threaten a woman's right to choose, this emotionally affecting memoir from a doctor on the front lines of the abortion debate reveals what's really at stake in the Supreme Court
In America the reproductive justice debate is reaching a new pitch, with the Supreme Court weighted against women's choice and state legislatures passing bills to essentially outlaw the practice of abortion. With This Common Secret , Dr. Susan Wicklund chronicles her twenty-year career in the vanguard of the abortion war. Growing up in working-class rural Wisconsin, Susan made the painful decision to have an abortion at a young age. It was not until she became a doctor that she realized how many women shared her ordeal of an unwanted pregnancy. . . and how hidden this common experience remains.
Now, in this raw and riveting true story, Susan and the patients she's treated share the complex, anguished, and empowering emotions that drove their own choices. Hers is a calling that means sleeping on planes and commuting between clinics in different states -- and that requires her to wear a bulletproof vest and to carry a .38 caliber revolver. This Common Secret reveals the truth about the reproductive health clinics that anti-abortion activists mischaracterize as damaging and unsafe. This intimate memoir explains how social stigma and restrictive legislation can isolate women who are facing difficult personal choices -- and how we as a nation can, and must, support them.
In America the reproductive justice debate is reaching a new pitch, with the Supreme Court weighted against women's choice and state legislatures passing bills to essentially outlaw the practice of abortion. With This Common Secret , Dr. Susan Wicklund chronicles her twenty-year career in the vanguard of the abortion war. Growing up in working-class rural Wisconsin, Susan made the painful decision to have an abortion at a young age. It was not until she became a doctor that she realized how many women shared her ordeal of an unwanted pregnancy. . . and how hidden this common experience remains.
Now, in this raw and riveting true story, Susan and the patients she's treated share the complex, anguished, and empowering emotions that drove their own choices. Hers is a calling that means sleeping on planes and commuting between clinics in different states -- and that requires her to wear a bulletproof vest and to carry a .38 caliber revolver. This Common Secret reveals the truth about the reproductive health clinics that anti-abortion activists mischaracterize as damaging and unsafe. This intimate memoir explains how social stigma and restrictive legislation can isolate women who are facing difficult personal choices -- and how we as a nation can, and must, support them.
268 pages, Hardcover
First published December 7, 2007
About the author
Susan Wicklund
2 books16 followersSusan Wicklund has worked in the field of women's reproductive health for more than twenty years. For much of that time she has been on the front lines of the abortion war, both as a doctor and as a spokeswoman for women's rights. She has been interviewed by numerous leading media outlets, including 60 Minutes and "Fresh Air."
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 381 reviews
January 13, 2008
This story exposes all the grays.
I'm so happy this book was written, yet am sad that it had to be. Whether we like it or not, abortions have always been around.
This is the story of one abortion provider. She treats women in the midwest and west, areas of the country that face challenges to abortion that I'm not used to thinking about, living here in NY.
I am a pro-choice, feminist activist, just to lay that out on the line. I was actually a little put off by some of the boundaries that the doctor drew in her life. For example, not performing abortions after 14 weeks, and intense questioning of the patient before determining if she really meant what she said, and therefore wouldn't be turned away. I'll admit it. These are areas where I like to see black and white. If a woman wants an abortion, she should get it, as far as I'm concerned. I don't care how far along she is or what her reasons are. I'll allow that some women regret it afterwards, but, why turn someone away because there is a possibility of "making that mistake?" With freedom comes the freedom to make mistakes. That's life.
But this book doesn't just stop at exposing the "typical" grays, that abortion can be a hard choice, and that no one can really walk in another woman's shoes.
No, this book exposes ALL the grays. The grays of the abortion provider. The grays of the protesters. The grays of performing a job which is more intensely stressful than any job I could personally handle. It's 100 percent real. And everyone should read it.
It's really quite excellent at getting people to realize that they really can't, and shouldn't judge, the choices of others.
It's a quick read, divided into 14 chapters. The anecdotal stories are supported with compelling evidence. It neatly stops and starts with an elderly woman figure, but in drastically different circumstances, so the reader feels satisfied and not left hanging, even though, as the afterward points out, the story hasn't come close to ending.
Thank goodness there are people like Susan Wicklund out there. Her bravery astounds me.
I'm so happy this book was written, yet am sad that it had to be. Whether we like it or not, abortions have always been around.
This is the story of one abortion provider. She treats women in the midwest and west, areas of the country that face challenges to abortion that I'm not used to thinking about, living here in NY.
I am a pro-choice, feminist activist, just to lay that out on the line. I was actually a little put off by some of the boundaries that the doctor drew in her life. For example, not performing abortions after 14 weeks, and intense questioning of the patient before determining if she really meant what she said, and therefore wouldn't be turned away. I'll admit it. These are areas where I like to see black and white. If a woman wants an abortion, she should get it, as far as I'm concerned. I don't care how far along she is or what her reasons are. I'll allow that some women regret it afterwards, but, why turn someone away because there is a possibility of "making that mistake?" With freedom comes the freedom to make mistakes. That's life.
But this book doesn't just stop at exposing the "typical" grays, that abortion can be a hard choice, and that no one can really walk in another woman's shoes.
No, this book exposes ALL the grays. The grays of the abortion provider. The grays of the protesters. The grays of performing a job which is more intensely stressful than any job I could personally handle. It's 100 percent real. And everyone should read it.
It's really quite excellent at getting people to realize that they really can't, and shouldn't judge, the choices of others.
It's a quick read, divided into 14 chapters. The anecdotal stories are supported with compelling evidence. It neatly stops and starts with an elderly woman figure, but in drastically different circumstances, so the reader feels satisfied and not left hanging, even though, as the afterward points out, the story hasn't come close to ending.
Thank goodness there are people like Susan Wicklund out there. Her bravery astounds me.
January 16, 2016
Anyone who has spent any more than about five or ten minutes with me will understand that I am pro-choice. This does not necessarily mean pro-abortion, or anti-life. This means that I believe the choice to receive an abortion is up to each and every individual woman, since it involves her body. It does not matter if I agree with her reasons for choosing an abortion; it only matters that I allow her to make the decision herself (without pressure from anyone else) and, if necessary, assist her in any way I can.
For others who feel this way, Wicklund's book will ring true for them. It will seem a bit of preaching-to-the-choir, but it will also feel like an important book that should be required reading. At least this is how I feel.
For others who do not feel this way, Wicklund's book may feel like an attack against their beliefs. It may make them question their own beliefs, and what they were raised to expect abortions to entail, or make them question their own stance. This isn't a bad thing, really, but it can feel bad to those who have lived much of their lives feeling their way is the only way. I would feel the same if I read a book written by an anti-choice activist.
But the importance of literature is that the books we read can be eye-opening no matter what our beliefs. I believe in trying to read what might make us uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable with the idea of this book initially only because discussions of abortion and women's rights issues can be such sticky ones, and I worried of this being over-the-top or too in-your-face. I read about women's issues daily. I am a woman, so issues that surround me are already in-your-face. I wasn't sure if reading a book about it would be helpful for me or not.
Ultimately, however, I decided to read this because it was written by an abortion doctor. I've read articles by people who work in abortion clinics in some capacity or another; I've read articles by people who have had abortions themselves and either regret the decision or defend their decision; I've known other women who have had abortions and have both positive and negative stories depending on how they decided to go about it. But I couldn't think of anything I had read by a doctor who has performed abortions.
Susan Wicklund describes the reasons why she chose to become a doctor and why, specifically she chose to begin an abortion clinic. She spent many years performing abortions across the Midwest in the 80s and 90s, and here she details those experiences. There are haunting episodes of being a prisoner in her own home, fearing for the safety for herself and the lives of her husband and daughter. She talks about having to carry a gun and wearing a bulletproof vest just to go to work, and having to change her route and her schedule to avoid activists who would follow her or blockade her driveway, forcing her to go to a neighbor's house through the woods to get a ride to work.
What I learned from this book is that being an abortion doctor is a very isolating experience.
Above all, however, I think this is a good book for anyone considering an abortion herself, or for their family or friends or partners who are trying to understand what an abortion is about. Wicklund explains the why's, the how's, the what's, and the when's of an abortion without ever breaching a "too technical" discussion. It's easy to understand, it clarifies questions many people might have, and it can put to rest the fears many might have. I hope, if nothing else, it gives someone struggling with the decision the confidence to seek out a good provider who can take the time and energy to explain all the details with her the way Dr. Wicklund has done with her patients.
The statistics and quotes in the beginning of each chapter are provocative and important. I wonder how many of the statistics have changed even in the nine years since the book was published. I read the news and I know abortion clinics are still under fire and doctors' lives (and their staff) are still at risk. Planned Parenthood is a hot topic in the news still in 2016 and people still get all upset about the abortions they provide, often ignoring the other services they provide from mammograms to reproductive counseling to gynecological exams.
Please take the time to educate yourselves on the real matters. Above all, don't talk to me about what "God" wants.
Additional reading recommended by members of The F-Word:
For others who feel this way, Wicklund's book will ring true for them. It will seem a bit of preaching-to-the-choir, but it will also feel like an important book that should be required reading. At least this is how I feel.
For others who do not feel this way, Wicklund's book may feel like an attack against their beliefs. It may make them question their own beliefs, and what they were raised to expect abortions to entail, or make them question their own stance. This isn't a bad thing, really, but it can feel bad to those who have lived much of their lives feeling their way is the only way. I would feel the same if I read a book written by an anti-choice activist.
But the importance of literature is that the books we read can be eye-opening no matter what our beliefs. I believe in trying to read what might make us uncomfortable. I was uncomfortable with the idea of this book initially only because discussions of abortion and women's rights issues can be such sticky ones, and I worried of this being over-the-top or too in-your-face. I read about women's issues daily. I am a woman, so issues that surround me are already in-your-face. I wasn't sure if reading a book about it would be helpful for me or not.
Ultimately, however, I decided to read this because it was written by an abortion doctor. I've read articles by people who work in abortion clinics in some capacity or another; I've read articles by people who have had abortions themselves and either regret the decision or defend their decision; I've known other women who have had abortions and have both positive and negative stories depending on how they decided to go about it. But I couldn't think of anything I had read by a doctor who has performed abortions.
Susan Wicklund describes the reasons why she chose to become a doctor and why, specifically she chose to begin an abortion clinic. She spent many years performing abortions across the Midwest in the 80s and 90s, and here she details those experiences. There are haunting episodes of being a prisoner in her own home, fearing for the safety for herself and the lives of her husband and daughter. She talks about having to carry a gun and wearing a bulletproof vest just to go to work, and having to change her route and her schedule to avoid activists who would follow her or blockade her driveway, forcing her to go to a neighbor's house through the woods to get a ride to work.
What I learned from this book is that being an abortion doctor is a very isolating experience.
Above all, however, I think this is a good book for anyone considering an abortion herself, or for their family or friends or partners who are trying to understand what an abortion is about. Wicklund explains the why's, the how's, the what's, and the when's of an abortion without ever breaching a "too technical" discussion. It's easy to understand, it clarifies questions many people might have, and it can put to rest the fears many might have. I hope, if nothing else, it gives someone struggling with the decision the confidence to seek out a good provider who can take the time and energy to explain all the details with her the way Dr. Wicklund has done with her patients.
The statistics and quotes in the beginning of each chapter are provocative and important. I wonder how many of the statistics have changed even in the nine years since the book was published. I read the news and I know abortion clinics are still under fire and doctors' lives (and their staff) are still at risk. Planned Parenthood is a hot topic in the news still in 2016 and people still get all upset about the abortions they provide, often ignoring the other services they provide from mammograms to reproductive counseling to gynecological exams.
Please take the time to educate yourselves on the real matters. Above all, don't talk to me about what "God" wants.
Additional reading recommended by members of The F-Word:
*The Reality of Roe, The New Yorker - January 21, 2013
*Facing Harassment, Some Abortion Providers Turn to Armed Guards, Bullet-Proof Vests, NPR - December 17, 2015
*What It's Like to Be an Abortion Provider in the Midwest, Women's Health - January 5, 2016
February 24, 2009
Too often when we think of abortion we think of the legislation, policy and politics surrounding it. And when it does get personal it's generally the woman having the abortion who we hear from...the provider tends to get lost. So I really loved hearing from an abortion provider - as hard as her story was to hear, sometimes. This is a book that reminds you how grateful we should be to abortion providers who literally risk their lives to make sure women have reproductive choices.
April 19, 2012
Quick read.
Two new to me things stand out:
1. I didn't know what the procedure of an actual abortion was until I read this book (it didn't get so very technical). It is amazing what a little de-rhetoric-ing looks like.
2. I want to volunteer, support, speak up, protect, help women and abortion providers. What shitty working conditions the pro-lifers and our legislature have created for an essential service. Unfortunately, the opportunities to be supportive are plentiful thanks to this War on Women.
Two new to me things stand out:
1. I didn't know what the procedure of an actual abortion was until I read this book (it didn't get so very technical). It is amazing what a little de-rhetoric-ing looks like.
2. I want to volunteer, support, speak up, protect, help women and abortion providers. What shitty working conditions the pro-lifers and our legislature have created for an essential service. Unfortunately, the opportunities to be supportive are plentiful thanks to this War on Women.
July 6, 2008
Dr. Susan Wicklund worked in women's reproductive health for over twenty years. In that capacity, she was often the only doctor who would perform abortions in many areas of midwestern or rural states, such as Montana and Minnesota. Dr. Wicklund's memoir is written in a clear and almost matter of fact manner, but the story it tells is anything but dry and academic. Her book puts a human face on the issue of abortion in America today. The book provides unforgettable portraits of the women who get abortions, the providers and even the protesters.
In a note at the end of the book, Dr. Wicklund's co-author writes about himself and his wife that "like most people, we thought we knew the issues and the politics," but adds that it turned out that "in fact, we had no idea." He surely speaks for many readers of this book when he says that "many will turn the first page thinking they understand the parameters of the abortion issue in America. They will be floored."
"This Common Secret" can be seen as a reference to the veil of secrecy that surrounds abortion, despite the fact that a large percentage of people have either had an abortion or know someone close to them who has had one. But it can also refer to the little known reality of how difficult it is for many womean to get an abortion, despite the fact that it has been legal in America for over 30 years, and the Supreme Court has recognized it as a constitutional right. Many people have heard of the abortion protesters, but few perhaps realize the hatred and fanaticism with which this movement has terrorized, stalked, and harrassed abortion providers and how successful it has been in getting legislation passed which makes it difficult for women who want abortions in many parts of the country to get them. The reality is that even without making abortion illegal, it is all but impossible to get it in many rural areas.
And without doctors with the courage of Dr. Wicklund it would be even harder. Dr. Wicklund saw her face on "wanted" posters, she had her driveway blocked by cement barriers, she received a constant barrage of hate mail, threatening her and her family. She had to be escorted to and from her clinic by a security guard. She went to work armed with a handgun. Sadly, all of this was made necessary by the terroristic tactics of those very religious people who believe abortion is murder, and will stop at nothing, including murder, to impose their viewpoint on everyone else. Sadly, these tactics have also reduced the number of doctors willing to perform abortions. Dr. Wicklund's book is a must read for anyone interested in the issue of women's reproductive rights.
In a note at the end of the book, Dr. Wicklund's co-author writes about himself and his wife that "like most people, we thought we knew the issues and the politics," but adds that it turned out that "in fact, we had no idea." He surely speaks for many readers of this book when he says that "many will turn the first page thinking they understand the parameters of the abortion issue in America. They will be floored."
"This Common Secret" can be seen as a reference to the veil of secrecy that surrounds abortion, despite the fact that a large percentage of people have either had an abortion or know someone close to them who has had one. But it can also refer to the little known reality of how difficult it is for many womean to get an abortion, despite the fact that it has been legal in America for over 30 years, and the Supreme Court has recognized it as a constitutional right. Many people have heard of the abortion protesters, but few perhaps realize the hatred and fanaticism with which this movement has terrorized, stalked, and harrassed abortion providers and how successful it has been in getting legislation passed which makes it difficult for women who want abortions in many parts of the country to get them. The reality is that even without making abortion illegal, it is all but impossible to get it in many rural areas.
And without doctors with the courage of Dr. Wicklund it would be even harder. Dr. Wicklund saw her face on "wanted" posters, she had her driveway blocked by cement barriers, she received a constant barrage of hate mail, threatening her and her family. She had to be escorted to and from her clinic by a security guard. She went to work armed with a handgun. Sadly, all of this was made necessary by the terroristic tactics of those very religious people who believe abortion is murder, and will stop at nothing, including murder, to impose their viewpoint on everyone else. Sadly, these tactics have also reduced the number of doctors willing to perform abortions. Dr. Wicklund's book is a must read for anyone interested in the issue of women's reproductive rights.
February 6, 2017
Not terribly relevant but Wicklund's approach to doctor-patient relations... I wonder if that's normal re abortions? I strongly believe that doctors should be car mechanics for humans. You tell them what you want done; they use skills to identify and resolve those issues. Of course, there are a few more evaluations involved - whether it's an informed choice, whether it's an autonomous choice - but I don't know that Wicklund's touchy feels let's have four talks before I've decided that you've decided correctly approach works for me. It may well be the best approach - I don't know anything about women's feelings post abortion and how their care prior to that affects those feelings - but it's just an approach that I find personally horrifying. But I find anything smacking of paternalism horrifying tbh. And I know that most people don't. (Though they should!)
I mean: "I would rather have someone be very angry at me, even to the point of taking legal action against me, for not doing an abortion, than for doing an abortion she later regrets." Appalling. It's not your body. Stop. Paternalism in medicine has got to go. Women's rights will not be respected until it does.
I mean: "I would rather have someone be very angry at me, even to the point of taking legal action against me, for not doing an abortion, than for doing an abortion she later regrets." Appalling. It's not your body. Stop. Paternalism in medicine has got to go. Women's rights will not be respected until it does.
January 28, 2016
This is a thoughtful and engaging look at a miserable situation. A beautiful example of just how intertwined the personal and the political truly are.
February 3, 2017
Susan Wicklund manages to portray herself as a hero constantly tormented by pro-life activists – and if she's telling the truth, their behavior was horrible. But I suspect she isn't – because she lies about so many things. She claims that 5000 women died every year before Roe V Wade, when the CDC reported 39 deaths in 1972, the year before.. The cofounder of NARAL, one of the first pro-abortion organizations in America, admitted that they made up those figures. Wicklund also claims that late-term abortions are only done for health reasons, but Planned Parenthood's own research arm, the Alan Guttmacher Institute, has disproved this in at least one study, and many late-term abortionists have admitted that most of the abortions they do are on healthy mothers with healthy babies. She refers to "fetal tissue" and "products of conception" but doesn't say that as early as 7 1/2 weeks in the womb, a preborn baby has arms and legs, fingers and toes. Since she performs abortions up through 14 weeks, Wicklund has seen the dismembered body parts of children – but you wouldn't know it from her book. Sadly, her lies will be believed by most pro-choicers who read this book.
November 19, 2016
I should have learned by now to keep myself from discussing abortion with most people. Simply because most people have absolutely no grasp of the reality of abortion, nor do they try to inform themselves. This Common Secret is one of the best books I've read on the subject, and Dr. Susan is a true example of a strong, admirable woman. To face everything she did because she believed it was her job to give women the choice they deserve is proof of her bravery and dedication. To read about how she was subjected to violence and disrespect by people who are, supposedly, defending 'life' was heartbreaking, so is to realize that there are plenty of people out there who will resort to attack and abuse to impose their own beliefs. This book is one of those eye opening, life changing works of someone who deserves nothing but respect. I applaud Dr. Susan as much as I applaud every single woman who's not willing to let anyone but themselves decide on what's right or not for their own bodies.
September 28, 2014
Pro-choice? Read it. Anti-abortion? Unsure? Don't care. Read it anyway. This plain-spoken, gripping tale of Susan Wicklund's harrowing life as an abortion provider will remind you of the reality behind the black-and white sounding battle for women's reproductive health going on in our country and around the world. I can't recommend this book enough. I'll definitely be buying at least one copy for myself and possibly a couple more for donating...
April 8, 2021
"I know exactly what kind of work you do, and it is a good thing. People like you do it safely so that people like me don't murder their best friends."
This is an incredibly powerful book that quickly puts to rest the most common misconceptions about abortions. If you believe that life begins at conception and therefore abortion at any stage is murder, this isn't going to change your mind but then again, nothing is. If you hold any other reservations about abortion regarding the process and its outcomes, I think this would be an interesting read for you. Even as a staunch pro-choice advocate, I learned a lot reading this.
But this is not just about abortion, this is also Dr. Wicklund's memoir and her experiences with anti-abortion activists are truly harrowing. I did not realize the full extent of harassment and danger that abortion providers face; Dr. Wicklund is stalked, threatened, barricaded in her driveway, and even had her home broken into. She somehow still manages to go in day after day to help her patients. Her philosophy and practice comforted me a lot: she ensures that every patient is positive they want an abortion before she'll perform one, and she always covers the alternatives available. This should be the case with any elective procedure, but particularly abortion.
My only qualms were that some conversations just didn't feel real. Perhaps some stories were amalgamations of other stories, but at times they just felt scripted. I guess when you have the same conversations day in and day out, that can be the case though. It's not that I felt they weren't real, just a little too polished. But this was really a minor complaint and I'm really glad I finally got around to reading this and would recommend it to pretty much everyone.
June 26, 2024
I recommend this book to EVERYONE. Wicklund’s perspective on abortion as an abortion provider is absolutely necessary. Despite being quite educated on the topic, I learned a lot on the harassment and permanent threat abortion providers in the United States are under. Additionally, Wicklund’s narration of the diversity of paths that bring a person to abortion is extremely refreshing, as news sources often focus only on the most sensationalist stories. Sometimes, abortion is a simple choice, other times it is not. And most times, it is extremely difficult to access, even under Roe (which is the time the book is set in). The style is simple, and the story grips you all along. Whether you are informed on abortion, not, or just want a good read with a beautiful and informative story, this book is the one.
NB: unfortunately the book is not very gender inclusive, as the author uses « women » to designate abortion-seekers. Something to be aware of before starting the book.
NB: unfortunately the book is not very gender inclusive, as the author uses « women » to designate abortion-seekers. Something to be aware of before starting the book.
March 4, 2009
Wow... this book was hard to read at times, especially when the author talks about all that she went through to do her job and to help the women who needed her. I think that reading her story just reinforces how important a woman's right to choose is, and makes us grateful that there are doctors out there who are as dedicated and compassionate as Dr. Wicklund.
October 20, 2009
I had many problems with this book, some of which I'll get into in a moment. First I want to say that I rated this book, not based on my own opinion and thoughts, but on the actual book itself, the way it's written, the amount of talent the author has for writing, etc. Had I rated it on my own personal opinions it would have gotten nothing.
Now I'll get into some of the things that bothered me about Wicklund. At first, while still reading and thinking of my future review of this, I thought I would only review "the book" and not get into my feelings about abortion. I soon came to realize that just can't be done. Not for me anyway. So, here goes....
I'm anti-choice according to Wicklund. Okay. I can deal with that. But doesn't that then mean that Wicklund is anti-life? I'd rather be anti-choice any day. I'm seriously offended that she chose to use that term at all, especially in a book that I would think was meant to be objective. Anti-choice. Huh.
In the beginning of the book she tells of a story her grandmother told her and the story relates how her grandmother helped a friend perform an at home abortion where the friend dies. I can't help but feel that was put here for the books sake and nothing else. Maybe it was the way it related, maybe it was that it was all too pat, I don't know. It just didn't ring true for me. It seemed it was a way to set up for the rest of the book, a way to justify her actions to herself.
Then, of course, soon after this story we hear the story of Wicklund's own abortion. Which, as if anyone couldn't guess on their own was a horrible, horrible experience. (I'm not sure how any abortion experience can be anything but horrible personally.) Wicklund's abortion was horrible because the doctor was rude, no one told her what they were doing, etc. Another situation just a little too pat for me.
"....an eight-week embryo is about the size of my thumbnail. It cannot feel pain or think or have any sense of being...." Well, I guess that makes everything okay then doesn't it? I'd like to ask Wicklund, who choose when the size of the embryo, fetus, baby, what have you, who chooses when the size does start to matter? If it doesn't start to matter at the moment of conception then when? At ten weeks? Twenty? What right does anyone have to make that sort of decision?
Wicklund does. She decided to limit her practice to first trimester abortions after witnessing an abortion on a woman who was 21-weeks pregnant. Appalling is what it is but..... So Wicklund decides that it's just too much for her because the baby actually looks like a baby. So, in essence, as long as the baby doesn't look like a baby it's okay to perform the abortion. I don't understand this at all. That baby that "looks like a baby" didn't just pop up out of nowhere. That baby that looks like a baby is the same "tissue" that Wicklund, and many others, think it's okay to dispose of as if it were garbage.
Then we have story after story after story where Wicklund relates of "helping" patients. Sending them away because she can tell they aren't at peace with the decision, talking to them for hours before and after, etc. The whole book has a strong undertone of 'I'm the helper here- I'm a great person- please believe me!'. It makes me sick quite frankly.
She makes a point, at one point in the book, to mention that they "take great care disposing of "it" in a respectful, appropriate, legal manner." Why would anything that can be classified as an "it" need to be disposed of in an "appropriate" manner? Why not just throw "it" in the trash? That's what I do with the "it's" I throw away. But then again, I've never thrown away a baby. I suppose that's the distinction right there.
Does everyone know what a "partial birth abortion" is? In 2007 the Supreme Court upheld a ban on partial birth abortions. Wicklund says this type of abortion is often performed to save the mother, because of fetal defects, etc. According to Wicklund only 5% of abortions are partial birth abortions. So that makes it okay. I wonder why Wicklund herself won't perform them? Since she thinks it should be legal. Another question to remain unanswered I guess.
"Partial - birth - abortion". Think about those three words. Partial. Birth. Abortion. Wow. That there even is such a thing speaks volumes about humanity.
"....the small sac and villi" is what Wicklund and other abortion providers remove from women. There is no "capacity to feel pain, think, or have any sense of being." Wicklund seems to think that tissue "represents potential." That the "woman carrying "it" has to have the freedom and ability to nurture and grow that potential."
She's concerned about the womens rights. Their pursuit of happiness. Their ambitions. She talks of the fetus being like a seed falling from a tree. Not every seed becomes a tree. I'm forced to ask then, what about the baby's happiness? What about the child's rights? What about the ambitions that they'll never have? Wicklund doesn't discuss this. Not at all- it's not even mentioned once. Ironic.
There is the incest patient and the rape patient that Wicklund tells us about. Besides those two stories, every single scenario she relates could have been avoided, yet Wicklund talks like the immaculate conception occured. We have the woman who doesn't want to have the baby because her husband beats her. Oh, sure. Okay. Well, why were you fucking him then? YOU got pregnant. That baby didn't just pop into you one day through no fault of your own. YOU did it. And YOU don't want to face the consequences of your actions so another person, a baby not born yet, has to deal with them for you. We have the college student who wants to finish college before having a baby. But she couldn't keep her legs closed through college. Basically, in short, almost every one of them wants to have their cake and eat it too. They want to be able to have sex whenever they want, knowing it can lead to pregnancy, and be able to not deal with that pregnancy when it does happen.
It's stated in the book that no woman deals with abortion lightly. I'm here to disagree with that. That's a heavy sentence. I remember it saying "no woman". I've known women who have had abortions and DID take them lightly. Very lightly in fact. I've known others, more than I care to admit, who have had numerous abortions. And what is that called again? Oh yeah, using abortion as a form of birth control. And hiding under 'women's rights'. It's disgusting and it's immoral.
I can't help but wonder what would happen is Wicklund's daughter Sonja got pregnant and wanted an abortion? What if it was Wicklund's grandbaby thay was going to get sucked out and "disposed of respectfully"? I wonder if it would all be okay then?
The statistics shared here are frightening. The sheer number of babies being "disposed of" each year is staggering.
For all you anti-lifers out there who may read this and get pissed, I'm not saying abortions shouldn't be around. I would never suggest that a victim of incest, a victim of rape should be made to have the baby. What I'm saying is that abortion shouldn't be used as it's being used. No baby should be murdered because the mother wasn't woman enough to deal with what she caused to happen. That's what I'm saying. This will be the last book of it's kind I'll read. I can't stomach anymore.
Now I'll get into some of the things that bothered me about Wicklund. At first, while still reading and thinking of my future review of this, I thought I would only review "the book" and not get into my feelings about abortion. I soon came to realize that just can't be done. Not for me anyway. So, here goes....
I'm anti-choice according to Wicklund. Okay. I can deal with that. But doesn't that then mean that Wicklund is anti-life? I'd rather be anti-choice any day. I'm seriously offended that she chose to use that term at all, especially in a book that I would think was meant to be objective. Anti-choice. Huh.
In the beginning of the book she tells of a story her grandmother told her and the story relates how her grandmother helped a friend perform an at home abortion where the friend dies. I can't help but feel that was put here for the books sake and nothing else. Maybe it was the way it related, maybe it was that it was all too pat, I don't know. It just didn't ring true for me. It seemed it was a way to set up for the rest of the book, a way to justify her actions to herself.
Then, of course, soon after this story we hear the story of Wicklund's own abortion. Which, as if anyone couldn't guess on their own was a horrible, horrible experience. (I'm not sure how any abortion experience can be anything but horrible personally.) Wicklund's abortion was horrible because the doctor was rude, no one told her what they were doing, etc. Another situation just a little too pat for me.
"....an eight-week embryo is about the size of my thumbnail. It cannot feel pain or think or have any sense of being...." Well, I guess that makes everything okay then doesn't it? I'd like to ask Wicklund, who choose when the size of the embryo, fetus, baby, what have you, who chooses when the size does start to matter? If it doesn't start to matter at the moment of conception then when? At ten weeks? Twenty? What right does anyone have to make that sort of decision?
Wicklund does. She decided to limit her practice to first trimester abortions after witnessing an abortion on a woman who was 21-weeks pregnant. Appalling is what it is but..... So Wicklund decides that it's just too much for her because the baby actually looks like a baby. So, in essence, as long as the baby doesn't look like a baby it's okay to perform the abortion. I don't understand this at all. That baby that "looks like a baby" didn't just pop up out of nowhere. That baby that looks like a baby is the same "tissue" that Wicklund, and many others, think it's okay to dispose of as if it were garbage.
Then we have story after story after story where Wicklund relates of "helping" patients. Sending them away because she can tell they aren't at peace with the decision, talking to them for hours before and after, etc. The whole book has a strong undertone of 'I'm the helper here- I'm a great person- please believe me!'. It makes me sick quite frankly.
She makes a point, at one point in the book, to mention that they "take great care disposing of "it" in a respectful, appropriate, legal manner." Why would anything that can be classified as an "it" need to be disposed of in an "appropriate" manner? Why not just throw "it" in the trash? That's what I do with the "it's" I throw away. But then again, I've never thrown away a baby. I suppose that's the distinction right there.
Does everyone know what a "partial birth abortion" is? In 2007 the Supreme Court upheld a ban on partial birth abortions. Wicklund says this type of abortion is often performed to save the mother, because of fetal defects, etc. According to Wicklund only 5% of abortions are partial birth abortions. So that makes it okay. I wonder why Wicklund herself won't perform them? Since she thinks it should be legal. Another question to remain unanswered I guess.
"Partial - birth - abortion". Think about those three words. Partial. Birth. Abortion. Wow. That there even is such a thing speaks volumes about humanity.
"....the small sac and villi" is what Wicklund and other abortion providers remove from women. There is no "capacity to feel pain, think, or have any sense of being." Wicklund seems to think that tissue "represents potential." That the "woman carrying "it" has to have the freedom and ability to nurture and grow that potential."
She's concerned about the womens rights. Their pursuit of happiness. Their ambitions. She talks of the fetus being like a seed falling from a tree. Not every seed becomes a tree. I'm forced to ask then, what about the baby's happiness? What about the child's rights? What about the ambitions that they'll never have? Wicklund doesn't discuss this. Not at all- it's not even mentioned once. Ironic.
There is the incest patient and the rape patient that Wicklund tells us about. Besides those two stories, every single scenario she relates could have been avoided, yet Wicklund talks like the immaculate conception occured. We have the woman who doesn't want to have the baby because her husband beats her. Oh, sure. Okay. Well, why were you fucking him then? YOU got pregnant. That baby didn't just pop into you one day through no fault of your own. YOU did it. And YOU don't want to face the consequences of your actions so another person, a baby not born yet, has to deal with them for you. We have the college student who wants to finish college before having a baby. But she couldn't keep her legs closed through college. Basically, in short, almost every one of them wants to have their cake and eat it too. They want to be able to have sex whenever they want, knowing it can lead to pregnancy, and be able to not deal with that pregnancy when it does happen.
It's stated in the book that no woman deals with abortion lightly. I'm here to disagree with that. That's a heavy sentence. I remember it saying "no woman". I've known women who have had abortions and DID take them lightly. Very lightly in fact. I've known others, more than I care to admit, who have had numerous abortions. And what is that called again? Oh yeah, using abortion as a form of birth control. And hiding under 'women's rights'. It's disgusting and it's immoral.
I can't help but wonder what would happen is Wicklund's daughter Sonja got pregnant and wanted an abortion? What if it was Wicklund's grandbaby thay was going to get sucked out and "disposed of respectfully"? I wonder if it would all be okay then?
The statistics shared here are frightening. The sheer number of babies being "disposed of" each year is staggering.
For all you anti-lifers out there who may read this and get pissed, I'm not saying abortions shouldn't be around. I would never suggest that a victim of incest, a victim of rape should be made to have the baby. What I'm saying is that abortion shouldn't be used as it's being used. No baby should be murdered because the mother wasn't woman enough to deal with what she caused to happen. That's what I'm saying. This will be the last book of it's kind I'll read. I can't stomach anymore.
February 28, 2015
I've been meaning to read this book for over 4 years now. Since my daughter used it as reference for her senior seminar project. Reading her pen scribbled notes all over in the margin made me proud. I'm always proud of her but her strong yet sensitive convictions about this book and her bravery of picking a pro-choice topic in a mainly conservative location we lived at that time showed her strength. I had many post it notes as I read, intending to refer to them as I wrote this review. In the end I will simply rate it 5 stars for the critical message it provides. I think my favorite passage is "She ultimately agreed that no one should be able to make that choice for any woman. Not the government. Not a parent or husband or minister."
February 18, 2008
This woman is one tough cookie and an admirable fighter in the controversial battle over a woman's right to choose, and I have great respect for the work that she has done. The world would be a better place with more people like Susan Wicklund.
The book, however, could be tighter. The narrative veers off at times and is sometimes clunky when she starts lecturing the reader.
The book, however, could be tighter. The narrative veers off at times and is sometimes clunky when she starts lecturing the reader.
March 8, 2011
This is the true story of Susan Wicklund’s life as a doctor who specialized in women’s health and who travelled extensively, at risk to her and her family’s life, performing abortions.
She starts the story with the day that she came home to tell Flower Grandma (a name her daughter had given her maternal grandmother) that she was working as an abortion doctor. She had to do this, because she was about to be interviewed on a segment of “60 Minutes” and she knew that Flower Grandma watched “60 Minutes” every week.
She then relates her experience when she had an abortion. She found it to be a horrible experience. Not because of the abortion but because of the way she was treated by the staff at the clinic. No one would answer the questions she had about the procedure and they treated her like she was a toddler rather than an adult woman.
Shortly after that, she found herself pregnant again – but this time her circumstances had changed and she and her boyfriend decided to marry and have the baby, her daughter Lisa. They’re marriage eventually dissolved and she moved back to the Midwest with her daughter.
While back in the Midwest, she was telling someone how much she missed helping women deliver babies (she’d been working as a midwife until laws were passed against her doing this work.) He suggested that she become a doctor. She mulled over this idea and soon found herself enrolled in college studying to be a doctor.
While in medical school, she caused controversy – first by refusing to perform pelvic exams on sedated women who were there for other procedures and unaware that the doctors were going to have students perform these procedures on them while they were unconscious. Then she caused more controversy by insisting that she be taught how to perform abortions.
She eventually took over a clinic in Montana that provided health services for women. Her clinic provided all healthcare services for women, but one of the rules was that any woman who wanted an abortion had to be positive beforehand this was what she wanted to do. It had to be her decision – not her boyfriend, mother, father or best friend’s decision. During this time she also continued to work at clinics throughout the Midwest doing abortions.
This was very dangerous work. She was constantly stalked by antiabortionists (she refers to them as antis.) They would stalk her at the airports, blockade her home, send her threatening mail – anything to intimidate her. She constantly changed her routes to and from work and her routines. The police were rarely willing to do anything to protect her. They always told her they couldn’t do anything until someone did something to her.
A very interesting and sometimes maddening story. She tells stories of patients desperate to have abortions and a story or two of those who thought they wanted abortions, but didn’t get them and contacted her later to tell her of the joy they are getting from their child.
She starts the story with the day that she came home to tell Flower Grandma (a name her daughter had given her maternal grandmother) that she was working as an abortion doctor. She had to do this, because she was about to be interviewed on a segment of “60 Minutes” and she knew that Flower Grandma watched “60 Minutes” every week.
She then relates her experience when she had an abortion. She found it to be a horrible experience. Not because of the abortion but because of the way she was treated by the staff at the clinic. No one would answer the questions she had about the procedure and they treated her like she was a toddler rather than an adult woman.
Shortly after that, she found herself pregnant again – but this time her circumstances had changed and she and her boyfriend decided to marry and have the baby, her daughter Lisa. They’re marriage eventually dissolved and she moved back to the Midwest with her daughter.
While back in the Midwest, she was telling someone how much she missed helping women deliver babies (she’d been working as a midwife until laws were passed against her doing this work.) He suggested that she become a doctor. She mulled over this idea and soon found herself enrolled in college studying to be a doctor.
While in medical school, she caused controversy – first by refusing to perform pelvic exams on sedated women who were there for other procedures and unaware that the doctors were going to have students perform these procedures on them while they were unconscious. Then she caused more controversy by insisting that she be taught how to perform abortions.
She eventually took over a clinic in Montana that provided health services for women. Her clinic provided all healthcare services for women, but one of the rules was that any woman who wanted an abortion had to be positive beforehand this was what she wanted to do. It had to be her decision – not her boyfriend, mother, father or best friend’s decision. During this time she also continued to work at clinics throughout the Midwest doing abortions.
This was very dangerous work. She was constantly stalked by antiabortionists (she refers to them as antis.) They would stalk her at the airports, blockade her home, send her threatening mail – anything to intimidate her. She constantly changed her routes to and from work and her routines. The police were rarely willing to do anything to protect her. They always told her they couldn’t do anything until someone did something to her.
A very interesting and sometimes maddening story. She tells stories of patients desperate to have abortions and a story or two of those who thought they wanted abortions, but didn’t get them and contacted her later to tell her of the joy they are getting from their child.
August 6, 2009
As Susan Wicklund points out, rarely is abortion discussed beyond political rhetoric based on untruths, despite the fact that 40% of American women have had/will have an abortion in their lifetime. As she more astutely speculates, perhaps the freedom of nearly half the population of the country to make personal medical decisions would not be constantly endangered if men, instead of women, were the child-bearing half of the species. Are there any other surgeries that are the subject of divisive public policy?
Despite these staunchly feminist and pro-choice points, "This Common Secret" is really the autobiography of a Midwestern single mom who became a doctor, and applied her skills where and how she felt they were most needed. Unfortunately, that story is impossible to tell without addressing the massive, crushing swirl of political conjecture surrounding her chosen line of work, not to mention the oppressive and ill-informed "anti-choice" protesters who drastically and forcefully disrupt her daily life, although thankfully (and incredibly) not her career. Dr. Wicklund is a brave health worker whose work challenges the nonsensical reverence of a small, undeveloped piece of tissue over the value of a woman's life and liberty. For anyone interested in women's rights, women's health, and reproductive freedom, this book is a solid, readable, straightforward place to get a good frame of reference.
Despite these staunchly feminist and pro-choice points, "This Common Secret" is really the autobiography of a Midwestern single mom who became a doctor, and applied her skills where and how she felt they were most needed. Unfortunately, that story is impossible to tell without addressing the massive, crushing swirl of political conjecture surrounding her chosen line of work, not to mention the oppressive and ill-informed "anti-choice" protesters who drastically and forcefully disrupt her daily life, although thankfully (and incredibly) not her career. Dr. Wicklund is a brave health worker whose work challenges the nonsensical reverence of a small, undeveloped piece of tissue over the value of a woman's life and liberty. For anyone interested in women's rights, women's health, and reproductive freedom, this book is a solid, readable, straightforward place to get a good frame of reference.
March 2, 2011
This book, like this doctor, is amazing. I read it in one sitting, and it brought me to tears many times over. As a doctor providing legal abortions in clinics across the midwest and west, Dr. Wicklund tells of the constant struggle to ensure she's acting in every patient's best interest. She is a workaholic, and is also struggling to maintain her marriage and her identity as a mother, while flying three to four times a week all over the country. Finally, the threat of violence against abortion doctors increases dramatically throughout her career, and permeate every part of her life, public and private. Reading the struggles of her patients, the stories they share, the grace they maintain throughout making decisions about their lives, are incredibly touching. Some of the best, though, are Wicklund's stories of the complete strangers who help her through difficult twists and turns of her life: those that help her hide her identity, patients who don't realize she's their doctor and hold her while she cries on the steps... This book is just amazing.
June 23, 2008
This is a very powerful and interesting book. Wicklund really lays it all out there for the reader, including diary entries. For someone who mostly reads irony filled fiction, the sincerity of this book made me a bit uncomfortable at times. The focus is on abortion of course, but it was also really interesting for me to just read a story about a woman going through med school and building a career regardless of her speciality. I realized that we don't get to see that much - how a career path can be very twisted and not the straight shot that we think it's going to be.
I had the luck to see Wicklund when she came through Portland and she was very personable and powerful in person as well, so that definitely added to the book for me.
Bottom line: A very powerful book that is about the intracacies of personal choice and community.
I had the luck to see Wicklund when she came through Portland and she was very personable and powerful in person as well, so that definitely added to the book for me.
Bottom line: A very powerful book that is about the intracacies of personal choice and community.
August 9, 2008
This is an amazing book. Everyone in the pro-choice community should read this. If you're open-minded enough, those who are against abortion should also read this book to gain an insight into what the radical anti-abortion forces are doing to the lives of providers. My full review is on my site.
May 22, 2008
I cannot come up with any sort of review for this... I think some of the anti's need to read this to understand WHY the doc does what she does. I did not say condone, or agree, but just try to understand this woman and her patients.
November 29, 2008
Excellent, excellent book written by an amazing and compassionate doctor. A must-read for anyone interested in reproductive rights, no matter which side of the fence you're on.
July 1, 2021
This was a fantastic read!! Susan Wicklund is an amazing doctor and I didn't realize just how isolating an experience being an abortion doctor could be. I worked as a counselor at an abortion clinic for a period of time and I was lucky that we didn't get any protestors, ever. Not sure if it was because we were in a building with a lot of other businesses (including a hospital) or because even the clinic website was vague about the exact location (on purpose), but either way, we were lucky. I can't imagine getting stalked the way this doctor was just because she believed wholeheartedly in a woman's right to choose. It does not matter if you agree with a woman's decision or the reason behind the decision - she still gets to choose for herself.
I liked that she believed in the counseling process to make sure a woman was certain, but there were times when it went too far. I do believe the conversation should be had, especially because there are women who are being forced to have it done. I actually dealt with MANY parents of minors who were irate that we wouldn't perform the procedure if the patient herself didn't want to. Yes, I am fanatically pro-choice and that means every woman has the CHOICE. Forcing a woman to get an abortion is just as bad as forcing her to go through with the pregnancy. Anyway, I thought this doctor went too far with four different conversations. I think that abortion is just about the only procedure where a patient's mind is questioned as much as it is. Oy
But this was an eye opening look at the life of a woman dedicated to helping other women and I loved it!
I liked that she believed in the counseling process to make sure a woman was certain, but there were times when it went too far. I do believe the conversation should be had, especially because there are women who are being forced to have it done. I actually dealt with MANY parents of minors who were irate that we wouldn't perform the procedure if the patient herself didn't want to. Yes, I am fanatically pro-choice and that means every woman has the CHOICE. Forcing a woman to get an abortion is just as bad as forcing her to go through with the pregnancy. Anyway, I thought this doctor went too far with four different conversations. I think that abortion is just about the only procedure where a patient's mind is questioned as much as it is. Oy
But this was an eye opening look at the life of a woman dedicated to helping other women and I loved it!
November 30, 2024
it is hard to get a feel for how desolate the american west really is until you see it for yourself; it is no easy feat staring at flat roads and mountains for hours on end and the solitude seems to somehow always find you no matter how many mountain villages you stumble upon. even with that susan wicklund paints a vast perspective and ever pertinent historization of abortion access in the midwest showing that it takes more than policy, and most definitely a lot more bravery, community, commitment, gall, personhood, etc. than most are equipped with to change individual lives
. i’m probably saying too much esp as someone with little interaction w the medical and legal worlds professionally but naturally i cried a lot reading this and i think it’s a fair judgement to say that often abortion in the public eye is consumed with talk of lawmakers and policy that many people too often forget about the real lives and communities affected by these issues day to day. i understand the criticism of this largely being a personal anecdote but i think that is this books necessary advantage because it requires readers to dismiss any and all lenses of abortion that boil down to pure debate or politics or kantian ethics or what have you. i would say this book makes you think but for myself it just made me feel and i can confirm this after a heated argument with my father upon finishing the epilogue lol
. i’m probably saying too much esp as someone with little interaction w the medical and legal worlds professionally but naturally i cried a lot reading this and i think it’s a fair judgement to say that often abortion in the public eye is consumed with talk of lawmakers and policy that many people too often forget about the real lives and communities affected by these issues day to day. i understand the criticism of this largely being a personal anecdote but i think that is this books necessary advantage because it requires readers to dismiss any and all lenses of abortion that boil down to pure debate or politics or kantian ethics or what have you. i would say this book makes you think but for myself it just made me feel and i can confirm this after a heated argument with my father upon finishing the epilogue lol
June 27, 2018
No matter where you land in the abortion debate (which... shouldn't even be a fucking debate but I digress), you should read this book. Keep in mind that I don't typically cotton to memoirs, which makes my endorsement all the more powerful.
Dr. Susan Wicklund is a mother, a feminist, an outdoors enthusiast, and an abortion doctor. She has dedicated her life and career to providing compassionate care to pregnant women and girls, to offering options and sensitive counsel, to advocating for her patients both in the clinic and in the political sphere. And she has done it all while enduring extreme harassment and threats to her life and the lives of her family members.
She is a hero.
In This Common Secret, Wicklund explains how she began her education as a doctor, her own abortion, and why she decided to enter the realm of reproductive healthcare and specifically provide abortions as her primary practice. She writes about the constant harassment and invasion of her personal life, the death threats, the violence at her clinics, the extremists who made her life a living hell, the protestors and angry family members who abused her patients, living in fear, traveling in disguise, the long hours and painful family separation, the constant struggle to keep her clinics open and abortion safe and legal. It would've been shocking if I wasn't already aware of the violence of anti-choice extremists and the history of legal abortion in the United States.
But amid all the heartache, violence, and fear, Wicklund beautifully expressed something else: the love, compassion, and support that lives on in those who fight for women's rights. Throughout her story average people step up to protect her, her staff, her patients, and her clinics. From the fellow passenger who always walked her off the airplane through the hordes of protesters, to the churchgoers and community members who opened their homes to her when she was threatened, to the bodyguard who put his own life on the line to ensure her safety, to her husband and daughter who endured the harassment with support and patience. She took care to mention all the patients and their families who would thank her, either in private or in public. You can tell through her narrative that these people are the reason she keeps on going.
The impact of the story was overwhelmingly how absurdly difficult it is to live the life of an abortion doctor, constantly under a barrage of hatred while your fellow doctors are murdered in their homes and churches. But that overall impression was created through sharing numerous singular, jaw-dropping stories. The book opens with a story about her grandmother in the time before Roe v. Wade made abortion safe and legal. Wicklund then tells the story of her own abortion shortly after Roe v. Wade, at the hands of a callous doctor and nurse who disregarded her questions, comfort, and mental state. It was these moments that inspired her not only to be an abortion doctor, but to run her practice with compassion, to treat the whole patient and not just their uterus.
And then there were her specific stories about the anti-choice extremists she did battle with every day. There were the parents who tried to interfere with an abortion, the protestors who mobbed her and physically attacked her, the extremists who barricaded her in her home. Most telling were the hypocrites. One story that made my blood boil was when she had a patient come in who really wanted to stay pregnant, but couldn't afford it. Going out on a limb, Wicklund called the local Crisis Pregnancy Center (a front for anti-choice extremists who claim to offer options and support for pregnant people, but... don't) to ask them to help the patient. "What do you expect us to do?" they asked her over the phone. Fucking. Hypocrites.
Listen, I'm no stranger to the battle for reproductive freedom in this country. I'm a feminist, childfree, and educated. I've read a lot on the topic, I know the arguments against abortion, and I'm well aware of the laws and backlash. This book was written before Dr. Tiller was murdered, and it was chilling to see Wicklund write about him in the present tense, while he was still alive. And while I don't think "Anti-choice extremists are assholes, look how they've made Dr. Wicklund miserable" is a reason on its own for reproductive freedom, the reality of Wicklund's boots-on-the-ground experience in this fight adds proof to the necessity of abortion rights. It shows how lopsided this "debate" is. It discredits the stance against abortion by revealing the most extreme, yet logical, conclusion of that stance.
I didn't need any more convincing. But it's hard to read the stories of desperate pregnant people and not recognize a need for this form of healthcare. Real people suffer when abortion is outlawed. Real people are saved when clinics like Wicklund's are allowed to operate freely. And I don't just mean saved through abortion. Wicklund describes a pregnant preteen girl accompanied by her father. The clinic staff was able to discern that it was her father who raped and impregnated her, called the authorities, and freed this child from her abuser. They saved her.
It's easy to gain an academic understanding of the need for reproductive healthcare. Roe v. Wade. Planned Parenthood v. Casey. McFall v. Shrimp (the most important legal precedent for bodily autonomy and abortion access). But the human impact is arguably more important, and certainly more dramatic. I recommend Dr. Wicklund's memoir if you're at all interested in that human impact.
Again, she's a hero.
Dr. Susan Wicklund is a mother, a feminist, an outdoors enthusiast, and an abortion doctor. She has dedicated her life and career to providing compassionate care to pregnant women and girls, to offering options and sensitive counsel, to advocating for her patients both in the clinic and in the political sphere. And she has done it all while enduring extreme harassment and threats to her life and the lives of her family members.
She is a hero.
In This Common Secret, Wicklund explains how she began her education as a doctor, her own abortion, and why she decided to enter the realm of reproductive healthcare and specifically provide abortions as her primary practice. She writes about the constant harassment and invasion of her personal life, the death threats, the violence at her clinics, the extremists who made her life a living hell, the protestors and angry family members who abused her patients, living in fear, traveling in disguise, the long hours and painful family separation, the constant struggle to keep her clinics open and abortion safe and legal. It would've been shocking if I wasn't already aware of the violence of anti-choice extremists and the history of legal abortion in the United States.
But amid all the heartache, violence, and fear, Wicklund beautifully expressed something else: the love, compassion, and support that lives on in those who fight for women's rights. Throughout her story average people step up to protect her, her staff, her patients, and her clinics. From the fellow passenger who always walked her off the airplane through the hordes of protesters, to the churchgoers and community members who opened their homes to her when she was threatened, to the bodyguard who put his own life on the line to ensure her safety, to her husband and daughter who endured the harassment with support and patience. She took care to mention all the patients and their families who would thank her, either in private or in public. You can tell through her narrative that these people are the reason she keeps on going.
The impact of the story was overwhelmingly how absurdly difficult it is to live the life of an abortion doctor, constantly under a barrage of hatred while your fellow doctors are murdered in their homes and churches. But that overall impression was created through sharing numerous singular, jaw-dropping stories. The book opens with a story about her grandmother in the time before Roe v. Wade made abortion safe and legal. Wicklund then tells the story of her own abortion shortly after Roe v. Wade, at the hands of a callous doctor and nurse who disregarded her questions, comfort, and mental state. It was these moments that inspired her not only to be an abortion doctor, but to run her practice with compassion, to treat the whole patient and not just their uterus.
And then there were her specific stories about the anti-choice extremists she did battle with every day. There were the parents who tried to interfere with an abortion, the protestors who mobbed her and physically attacked her, the extremists who barricaded her in her home. Most telling were the hypocrites. One story that made my blood boil was when she had a patient come in who really wanted to stay pregnant, but couldn't afford it. Going out on a limb, Wicklund called the local Crisis Pregnancy Center (a front for anti-choice extremists who claim to offer options and support for pregnant people, but... don't) to ask them to help the patient. "What do you expect us to do?" they asked her over the phone. Fucking. Hypocrites.
Listen, I'm no stranger to the battle for reproductive freedom in this country. I'm a feminist, childfree, and educated. I've read a lot on the topic, I know the arguments against abortion, and I'm well aware of the laws and backlash. This book was written before Dr. Tiller was murdered, and it was chilling to see Wicklund write about him in the present tense, while he was still alive. And while I don't think "Anti-choice extremists are assholes, look how they've made Dr. Wicklund miserable" is a reason on its own for reproductive freedom, the reality of Wicklund's boots-on-the-ground experience in this fight adds proof to the necessity of abortion rights. It shows how lopsided this "debate" is. It discredits the stance against abortion by revealing the most extreme, yet logical, conclusion of that stance.
I didn't need any more convincing. But it's hard to read the stories of desperate pregnant people and not recognize a need for this form of healthcare. Real people suffer when abortion is outlawed. Real people are saved when clinics like Wicklund's are allowed to operate freely. And I don't just mean saved through abortion. Wicklund describes a pregnant preteen girl accompanied by her father. The clinic staff was able to discern that it was her father who raped and impregnated her, called the authorities, and freed this child from her abuser. They saved her.
It's easy to gain an academic understanding of the need for reproductive healthcare. Roe v. Wade. Planned Parenthood v. Casey. McFall v. Shrimp (the most important legal precedent for bodily autonomy and abortion access). But the human impact is arguably more important, and certainly more dramatic. I recommend Dr. Wicklund's memoir if you're at all interested in that human impact.
Again, she's a hero.
January 4, 2025
It's painful to read this book in the aftermath of Dobbs. While many believed Roe's rights should and would be protected in perpetuity, Dr Wicklund was among the few who ensured these rights conveyed to the countless people who needed them. It's hard to fathom how Dr Wicklund and other brave providers who persevered in the face of inhumane abuse (sadly, this book refers to Dr Tiller in the present tense -- he hadn't yet been murdered when it was published) felt in June 2022. Nevertheless, here we are. As abortion seems to have lost some of its political heat, we can only keep reading books like this one to more fully understand why abortion care will both be always part of our society, whether legally and safely or desperately and dangerously, yet because women are those who need it, never a priority.
September 29, 2024
A fantastic memoir of a physician’s journey as a provider of reproductive healthcare. Dr. Wicklund is a Wisconsin native, which made her story even more meaningful.
September 2, 2014
This book was hard for me to read. My curiosity had me picking it up anyway, but I have to say, I am first and foremost, Pro-Life. Always have been, always will be. So to read a pro-choice book, especially one written by an abortionist herself, was tough. I feel a lot of things after reading this book. I am ashamed of my fellow 'pro-life'er's; their behaviour and violence is disgusting. That doesn't even begin to cover it, but to keep from writing a novel on my frustrations, I'll just keep to this: I think they are delusional and wrong, and I will never agree with or identify with them. Secondly, I am not pro-life due to religion, and I disagree with the painting, intentional or not, of all pro-life people as religious zealots following an ancient ideal. I am surprised to say, I respect Susan. I didn't think I would, but for the most part, she manages to write this book in such a way that she doesn't come across as hateful of those on the other side of the line. All too often I find that both sides are too antagonistic of each too other, too unforgiving and unable to communicate. Susan, while unapologetically pro-choice, is not murderously hateful towards the pro-life side. Weirdly enough, I imagine she and I would have interesting conversations, to say the least. But at the same time, this book made me sad. I understand, sometimes all too well, the pro-choice way of thinking. And this book hammered that home. And that makes me sad, because it's hard to feel compassion for those that treat unborn life the way they do, for whatever reason. It's confusing, emotionally, to respect those that stand by their beliefs with a firm, but kind stance, while simultaneously detesting that very thing for which they stand. I'm glad I read the book, I have no regrets on that, but no amount of sad, pre-legal-abortion stories, or hateful pro-life-ers, will ever make me change my own stance and beliefs on this. I hope, someday, that whatever each of our beliefs, we can learn to find a peaceful way to coexist.
June 9, 2020
This Common Secret: My Journey as an Abortion Doctor is much like as it is named; Susan Wicklund's story of being an abortion doctor in the 90s and early aughts, dealing with the growing violence of the "pro-life" and her on-going compassion for the women she helps. It is a chilling, powerful read. She was inspired to enter medicine by a family friend, and inspired to enter women's health, and abortion services, by a legal-but-impersonal abortion she had when younger. Galvanized by her own grandmother's tale of a botched abortion, she waded amidst the sea of crazy that makes up the anti-abortion movement, providing help to women who needed it.
Since I could articulate it, I have maintained that I am pro-choice because my mother. She has three sons, one a year earlier than they planned. But she was also in college from 1967-1972, getting her Masters in Education (and meeting my Dad). While there, she saw the lengths that some women went to in order to end pregnancies. Bathing or douching with lye, coathanger abortions... the violence and pain they endured because they could not be pregnant. Wicklund relates this on every page; stories of women whose pregnancies must end, stories of women who don't want them to end but can't say it, and women who have scrabbled to make their one day off count... only to be told that the law requires them to wait 24 hours to have an abortion after being told a legally-mandated collection of half-truths.
Wicklund talks of the terror of anti-choice zealots barricading her and her family in their homes. About her decision to carry a gun after the "pro-life" assassinated people. Of being followed and harruanged by those who view women as incubators more valuable than a few ounces of tissue they host in the first trimester. Because the "pro-life" movement isn't about life. They don't want every child to be loved and wanted. They just want to control women, and ensure that their lives are circumscribed by their capacity to bear children, regardless of their own desires for life.
Since I could articulate it, I have maintained that I am pro-choice because my mother. She has three sons, one a year earlier than they planned. But she was also in college from 1967-1972, getting her Masters in Education (and meeting my Dad). While there, she saw the lengths that some women went to in order to end pregnancies. Bathing or douching with lye, coathanger abortions... the violence and pain they endured because they could not be pregnant. Wicklund relates this on every page; stories of women whose pregnancies must end, stories of women who don't want them to end but can't say it, and women who have scrabbled to make their one day off count... only to be told that the law requires them to wait 24 hours to have an abortion after being told a legally-mandated collection of half-truths.
Wicklund talks of the terror of anti-choice zealots barricading her and her family in their homes. About her decision to carry a gun after the "pro-life" assassinated people. Of being followed and harruanged by those who view women as incubators more valuable than a few ounces of tissue they host in the first trimester. Because the "pro-life" movement isn't about life. They don't want every child to be loved and wanted. They just want to control women, and ensure that their lives are circumscribed by their capacity to bear children, regardless of their own desires for life.
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