RavenGlamDVDCollector

Only watched halfway through. Bored. Aw...

Through the years I have been a big fan of Michelle Pfeiffer, especially do I have fond memories of The Fabulous Baker Boys. I'm currently re-watching many old titles and after White Oleander I switched to focus on Michelle. I've actually never seen this Grease 2 thingie and got it downloaded onto a flash drive. Settling in, I thought, well, forty-two years later, wow, what are the chances? Love it or hate it?

I'm not even gonna andwer that. By today's standards... oh shame. I'm just gonna say this. Forty-two years ago the entire rest of the cast should have knelt in front of Michelle Pfeiffer and have offered her half, no, four-fifths, of their earnings. Because they stink!

There is only one reason to watch this. Michelle Pfeiffer. It can only be likeable and watchable if one person is on the screen. Michelle Pfeiffer.

And even she makes an ASS of herself. Not only for being in it.

I wonder if you walk behind her now and go Hoo Hoo Rydell what's she gonna do? Turn beetroot red?

Just kidding, Michelle.

Anyway, this is Hoo Hoo Pathetic!

As The Raven, I collect the pretty-girls movies, and have had a lot to say about them after belatedly joining IMDb back in 2014. I was searching for the Heather Graham movie Committed and my computer wizard associate found the wrong one. Fortunately I am a stickler, a double-checker, so this aw, Greek-looking thing, I quickscanned through to about six minutes or so in. Yeah, there's at least a girl in this. And, yeah, she's quite pretty. So I kept it. Didn't expect anything much, though. For clearly, this is something small.

Yes, this is something small. But I've seen big movies that are just a slap in the face. Why do I even keep this? There is so much that I don't like.

I am currently pleasantly surprised. I am watching a total jewel. Like a small diamond that is really worth much much more than several Hollywood movies pooled together. And that's not even mentioning the weak stuff being regurgitated nowadays.

I stopped halfway to make this glorious experience last longer.

Few people know about this. That's evident because the contributions to this page were basically nonexistent before I came along today. Do you know what you are missing, all you incurable romantics out there? The all-time Valentine's Day movie!

The Raven heartily recommends this. Only to incurable romantics, of course. If you're not into that, you'd be bored out of your skull. But I applaud everybody involved with this movie. I could find nothing to criticise in the first 50+ minutes, and believe you me, I'm quick to notice where even great movies, immensely popular with me, have their flaws.

This is beautiful beautiful beautiful!

Jessica Simpson. If you carry a torch for her, do not watch this movie. Stick to her better music videos, but do not watch this movie.

And yet, this very unlikely film, it did make me chuckle several times. It had nothing in the Quotes department, a sure sign that people hated it, and yet there are good lines. But I put up some goodies.

You know why the DVD did so well? The bright shiny neatly-presented box cover. Yeah, I fell for that back in the day.

But Jessica Simpson, way past her sell-by date, couldn't possibly have carried it off.

That lipstick! That makeup! Girl, I don't wanna insult... but if you go out as a star in front of millions of people... I'm not gonna say anything more.

Anyway, the part required a fresher face. Much fresher.

Stumbled across this. Wasn't on my viewing list. My contact had it. So, a freebie. But you get what you pay for.

Instead of going into this, I'm gonna give you a bit of advice. In my home language there is a saying "al dra 'n aap 'n goue ring, bly hy nog 'n lelike ding." That's Afrikaans, sort of South African Dutch, and translates to "even if an ape wears a golden ring, it stays an ugly thing."

This sorry excuse for a miscreant movie had a cast that reminded me of this. Aw, Lily excepted, aw of course.

I well remember the response SHOWGIRLS got. Now, if life was fair, this pig excrement would get the same kind of treatment. But I don't think it did, because in the name of political correctness, a cast like this can do no wrong. Maybe if SHOWGIRLS had an all dark cast, it woulda been fine... Nobody would have criticized.

Crap. Even GIGI was better than this. MAID IN MANHATTAN was better than this. Every single one of Jennifer's music videos was better than this.

This stinks! It reeks! It's junk! Two hours of ugly ugly ugly pretending they're not old hasbeens. Aw, not you, Lily. Course not.

I have just one thing to say. No matter how this movie gets criticized, if you appreciate thrillers, and have the opportunity to view it, by all means, watch! Okay, the sexual content is high, it's an integral part of the story, so, if that keeps you away... But you just dont know what you are missing, and I do feel sorry for you.

Tension slowly but surely builds up towards a dramatic finale with a poignant ending. All puts to shame the average kind of conveyor-belt bulldroppings nowadays spewed out by Hollywood wannabe-moviemakers.

Susan George was unfortunately not really at her best, her performance is largely uneven, though at times, wow, what a leading lady! Full marks to everybody else. Great movie, superb classic, screen gem. Might now be 53 years old, but makes recent efforts in the era of technical wizardry look like child's handiwork.

Glad I can be of assistance. Thank me later, you lot following my advice.

I'm a fan of this largely for the scenes featuring Miss Rasmussen, who was a Victoria's Secret Angel at the time. I also got hooked on Rafael's Bolero because of this movie. It is the classiest music in a movie ever.

As for the movie itself, I try to understand. But it's like being a chameleon observing a rainbow, I get super confused. The ending brings everything so beautifully together, it's like it all gets tied up in a neat bow.

But there are oddly wooden performances, including that of the leading lady. The whole thing needed a Hollywood director with a much firmer grip on knowing what the American-type public wants, somebody who would yell over a megaphone "Emote! EMOTE!" cause largely these people are playing like wooden robots.

So, I will admit that I can't understand this thing even after repeated viewing through the years, since back in around 2007. But I want to like it. It's part genius and part failed big flop. Overall, of course, it's a monumental train wreck. But you can't take your eyes off it.

Hold on to your hats, fasten your seat belts, here we go with agent Sam, agent 0.0000 1/2. The milk beard boy on a mission!

Yeah, I had stumbled across this due to a search for the Kelly Overton movie "The Collective" and should just have discarded the results.

Have watched halfway to where the model became collateral damage. Hell, am I p****d off!

I have previously posted reviews in which I have ranted against the lame movies being churned out nowadays, i. E. the average content of Netflix (for sad losers!)

Motto of moviemakers nowadays: Have camera, some money, will make flick. Yeah, it's like writing a book. Anybody can write a book. It's writing a hit that's the problem. Anybody can think up an idea for a movie. Actually filming that movie in the proper way, that's another story.

In short, watching this, I think these chowder-heads should have their cameras confiscated, and get tarred and feathered and run out of town, disbarred from ever making another movie ever again.

Everybody keeping track of me on IMDb will notice that I watch fairly old movies Seventies, Eighties, Nineties, thereabouts. In the old days, the people knew how to make movies. Nowadays, nah! If the viewer feels nothing for the character, what's the point? Empty, empty, empty!

This movie stinks! It's really really rancid. A covert agent like this, a little girl can kick him in his nuts!

Where do we line up to tie a knot in the director's nose?

Doesn't matter how you look at it, this picture, although sumptuously filmed, only reflects the sick society in which we live in. That stuff like this can be allowed. Do any piece of film with a hint of sexual allure in it... public outcry! Ban it off our screens! But violence and gore... aw, that's just good-natured fun.

I suggest to anybody who doesn't have a cast-iron stomach to take along a barf bag.

Great marketing opportunity. Stand outside the theater, selling your product. "Getcha PEARL barf bag here! Getcha PEARL barf bag here!"

Believe me, you're gonna have satisfied customers. They're gonna thank you for having been there in their hour of need.

Rent yourself a good porn movie. One with plenty of XXX action. It's wholesome.

Okay, so this show isn't perfect. Far from it. But it held terrific promise. And ABC Family cancels it after the first season. The question is : Why?

More than a decade later, after not being able to find it on DVD, got it from the Net.

But here's the problem. There is no other way to watch it. There never was a DVD release. So, I'm stuck with watching it as I found it on the Net. A direct recording as it appeared on ABC Family. Which is a SISSY FAMILY SITE. People looking for a bit of adventure, don't go there Steer clear of ABC Family. Every two minutes, they throw an ad onto the screen advertising other shows. Never mind that you are trying to watch THE NINE LIVES OF CHLOE KING, they throw a reminder onto the screen, complete with moving pictures, that you are indeed watching The Nine Lives of Chloe King and then there appears a whole smorgasbord of their sissy shows as well, every fricking two minutes, over the action, over the drama... It's difficult to follow the story, there is this incessant nuisance.

And you AMERICANS stand for this bull!

Stop subscribing to stupid networks!

Demand better treatment!

How could THE NINE LIVES OF CHLOE KING have stood a fair chance? It's target audience surely wouldn't watch such a messy messy messy presentation!

It's ludicrous to have your viewing pleasure interrupted. Commercials are bad enough, but here you have your rights further infringed upon. I understand there are also weather reports and competitions thrown out onto your screens as well. It's pathetic!

Admittedly I haven't watched television in more than a decade, being a DVD nut. But I was dismayed to see how things are run in Big Land America. Yes, I am a South African, and in my country, everything sucks twelve times more, yes, but I'd have thought Americans had more sense! Stand up for your rights! Aren't you shelling out subscription fees?

As for this show, it could have been the BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER of the twenty-teens, but like it said, look where it got stuck.

Unfortunately I have to agree with helpless_dancer, one of the other reviewers here. Yeah, of course this was way back then, but really, it was bad. I mean, this story is slow and ponderous and nothing exciting happens. Really, that it lifted off AT ALL after this... what a bummer of a TV movie. There was only one high point, right at the end, Farrah Fawcett-Majors cooing "be sure to call if you need us, you hear?" or something like that. The episode itself is way, way, way below later standard. And this criticism comes from The Raven, who usually goes all out to bestow compliments on pretty actresses.

This... bland. Argh. One and a half hours, gah!

It is disgraceful that Paulina was nearly voted Worst Actress of the Year for this. What did the people expect from her, a song and dance routine thrown in as well? I suppose there had been a whole lot of haters involved too, most likely wannabe Tom Selleck groupies doing their envious thing.

Back in the day, this movie was a big hit with me, and certainly not because of ol' Magnum star's whiny ninny about-turn.

Look at Paulina, and then look at today's stars. Jeesh, there are total trash parading as "starz"... tattoo taxis, junkyard-made. Hollywood is in a slump! This movie, it is of course way, way, way corny in many, many places BUT it carries a certain charm, a certain innocence, a beauty in it...

In the old days, I read about the Golden Age of Hollywood. Back then, it was really still the Golden Age. Nowadays, very few bright-spark romantic comedy movies like this one pops up.

As a fan of Kristy Swanson, I saw this back in the day, and I must have been blind to how really bad it was... A long time later I became a big fan of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, the TV series. It's a very long time later now, watched this movie today... it's difficult to believe just how bad it really is. Kristy Swanson did a very, very poor job. Wonder if she ever, with hindsight, compared herself to Sarah Michelle Gellar? Oh, the shame!

Amazing what can be done with a doomed concept if you cast the right girl. The TV series is absolutely everything that the movie never was.

Don't waste your time watching this movie. Go for the seven seasons TV series.

Okay, so you lot say it's such a horrible movie. I say you're just being facetious. The people who would walk out of a theater would gladly rent the movie to watch it at home in private. It's like saying "SHOWGIRLS? Yuck!" but in quiet, you run home with your copy, lock all the doors, down go the blinds, eleven o'clock tonight it is happy time!"

Objectively seen, BOLERO is a beautifully-filmed movie with a fantastically beautiful star. Add the scene-stealing Olivia d'Abo and you have, well, a joyous happy time.

If the story shocks you, don't judge by American standards this Western European approach to sexual morality. Who can say what is right and wrong? Being warmly human is what is important, instead of being all prudish and saintly and holy and FAKE for in your heart, you are a WOLF in pious clothing...

I think it's a beautiful movie. And yet, you say, the worst ever? I can name you scores of movies from that time that are totally junk. This one dares to be sexy and to you, ooh, CARDINAL SIN, ooh I'll go to hell for having watched and ooh I'll burn for all eternity for I so much enjoyed so OOH better pretend I hated it.

All you pious self-conscious Holy Joes, add your dislikes to my review. Bet there's a thousand before tomorrow.

It's kind of embarrassing to watch a Rick Ashley video. That nerdy redhead bloke from the Stock Aiken Waterman days. Ah, but those days were good. Much much much better.

But I digress. In Afrikaans, that's, uh, South African Dutch, there's a saying, "dis nie die hondjie nie, dis die halsbandjie." It's not the little dog that attracts the attention, it's the little collar. Okay, I just realized the apt English counterpart, "It's not the singer, it's the song" but in this case, as The Raven, it's neither the singer nor the song... it's the lovely beach bunny in the pink outfit stripped off to reveal the yellow bikini.

Aw, when I play it now, oddly enough, Ol' Rick ain't quite as irritating as I expected him to be, but super schmaltzy sweet. Argh. Okay, back in the Eighties, I always thought, well, there you have it. Film Archie, with Rick as Archie Andrews, Kylie Minogue as Betty Cooper.

All the glowing reviews here, shove 'em. I don't like this movie. It starts off promising and then became just like a slasher. And slashers are fodder for common people. Low-class common people. So your artsy reviews, they're just yuck to me.

The longer this movie went on, it just irritated me. Like the lead character says, "she did not deserve to die like that." As a bad girl, she was a very lightweight bad girl, and I found that plot development OFFENSIVE... and you know what, I am The Raven, I have very, very liberal tastes, but this... No!

Psychologically, why do people wanna watch something like this? Because they're haters! They're jealous of the prom queen type. And in this movie, here the prom queen gets fried. So they get their jollies out of that. Argh! You buncha vermin, you common swine...

Go ahead, dislike this. Let's see how many haters I can add up standing in line here.

Sadly, one of her most fanatic fans bows out here. Jeez, what have we got here? The girl that once provided enthralled fans with the best music videos featuring Ke$ha's beauty and special brand of humor, that highly likable cheeky young girl... replaced by this... this... Aw, no. Aw, no. Aw, no. From Tik Tok and C'mon and Dying Young and Blow and Take It Off to this... Rainbow?

The opera isn't over until the fat lady sang. Well, the fat lady sang. It's over.

It doesn't deserve the One Star. It ranks a Big Fat Zero.

Observe the way this video ends. She's looking down, then looks up like a little puppy that made a mess. And no longer a cute puppy. She knows this offering ain't worth, uh, two specks of glitter.

Should have bowed out before this.

The animal comes alive, looking for something wild... Ke$ha and her gang taking over a deserted building and having a ripsnorting bash. Litter on the floor? And glitter on her every pore!

I wholeheartedly agree with calicodreaming, currently the only other reviewer here, that this is a perfect video for Ke$ha's song. It is now years and years later AND THEY JUST DON'T MAKE 'EM LIKE THIS ANYMORE! This one is absolutely fantastic, fun fun fun fun fun fun! Bursting with excitement! Glorious party lyrics. Wild and free! And what a beautiful girl!

Ke$ha is one of my toppermost favorites and all of her videos a feast!

You know what? This could have been a great. But it seems to have needed pimp mafia approval, include one of their rapper boy thugs or else we won't greenlight production of this. Really, why should real talent like Nicole Scherzinger require back-up by an ugly no-singing-talent dressed-like-a-pimp thug type? The song, and the flow of the video, the rhythm, everything, is broken by that big dork. Unfortunately his presence cannot be excised, he is like a big stain on what would otherwise have been very, very cute. High points for the girls, high points for the real song, minus points for the abomination ruining it all.

Answer me this: Would any female singer have been allowed to interrupt and INTRUDE UPON a black rapper?

I have seen some movies I loathe. This one takes the cake. It is the worst piece of drivel ever committed onto film I have sat through. I couldn't understand what these low-class people were saying. Such people generally would have very slack jaws from all that drinking and smoking, so it figures.

The Raven here is telling you STAY AWAY from this utter tripe. Watching paint dry now seems as exciting as a meteorite hitting Earth. Think of any fitting insult slung at a boring movie.

Like being savaged by a dead sheep.

So this one got a standing ovation eight minutes long at Cannes? Possibly because audience were so relieved DAMN THING WAS OVER.

Not a direct to video release? You mean, this ludicrous lame attempt actually played in theaters?

Complete utter waste of time.

Actually, my review stops here. Enough said. But the system (uselessly) demands more letters... to be wasted upon this unworthy trite. Okay, if it serves the purpose to deter one of you poor unsuspecting yokels out there...

I'd rather watch paint dry. Rather watch two dung beetles going at it.

The 1974 original is a classic. It's suspenseful. The 2006 version a hideous failure. This pathetic 2019 lame try, a bad trip encounter of mine here, comes from an error in downloading. I asked for the original, got it on the second try, but then gave this junk some playtime.

I did like the song, so I don't begrudge the one star I did give.

Might I suggest Camera Control in Hollywood No talent moviemakers shouldn't be allowed filming equipment ever again...

May she never work in Hollywood again!

While Reese Witherspoon's Elle comes across as irritatingly insipid, I find the Russo twins to be refreshingly charming. They have something that Reese just doesn't have (and not just because they come in stereo). I've actually watched all of these movies long ago on DVD, but have since switched to USB and am currently watching again. Years later, I'm much more critical. Storywise, the plot holes are there, but plot holes be damned, they're two very cute starlets, and I'd rather be watching them in a sequel as well (aw, never came to pass).

By the way, I play a little game while watching. Identify the twin on the screen. Besides the brighter pink / paler pink giveaway, Annie has a smaller sharper face, Izzy's is wider.

As for Mariah in this video, a high rating Her looks, her sound, all worthy of a high score. But what the hell happened here? Look, a superstar like Mariah Carey doesn't need an obvious crack addict as a backup to sell their records. Tell me, who do you think benefited from this uhm er performance? He should go hide his head in an aardvark hole. Look, I know the guy's long gone dead. But do you think he benefitted from this? Did the record sales really benefit from this? And what's worse, let's say they did. What would that have said of our society, our musical tastes? This is not even blacksploitation, it is drunksploitation. It is shameful. Mariah Carey should give every dollar she earned out of this to rehabilitation centers. I'm not sure about how this happened, but in the very first place, a powerful diva and influencer should have vetoed this hare-brained idea from the word go and shot it out of the water.

It is disgusting to see a drunken barbarian near retching over the fine qualities of a glorious talent ×1000 his own. It is shameful and everybody involved should feel utterly disgraced to their cores. If Mariah had any say in this : Respect lost!

Yes, more than a quarter of a century too late to berate this effectively.

Watching a USB download years later. I don't know what happens up ahead. I know it's all old news by now.

Up till now I've thought that Decker was really one of them too, just like Helen. I still think that might turn out to be the case.

But it came to light in here: Maddie's not really the Sheriff's daughter. He's her stepfather. And Maddie's mother is missing. She's gone on some sojourn.

So...

I haven't marked this as a SPOILER ALERT, because it's all conjecture on my part. But I'm quite sure I'm right, so don't read further if you're gonna blame me.

Maddie's mother was one of the mermaids as well. So this Sheriff married a mermaid. She has since left. Gone back. Sure to return. Big revelation at end of this season: Maddie's got mermaid blood. So, will Ben and Maddie end up having mermaid children?

Am I right?

Yeah, the classic setup. Home Alone. But not with an irritating blonde boy. No, with a lovely teenage girl. Housesitting. Now, as luck would have it, no, let me rephrase that... as misfortune would have it, she is guarding the rather stately home of obviously very wealthy people, and wouldn't you just know it, the college stalker / neighborhood prowler / master cat burglar The Hooded Intruder comes a-calling.

He has her hands tied behind her back. Now, this implausible scenario: He leaves her sitting there while he goes off to rummage through the house searching jewels and cash. Now, this girl appears bright enough to fathom that she has this excellent chance of escaping by simply making her way to the kitchen and finding a knife by reversing up against the cutlery drawer, sure thing. Okay, she might hurt herself a bit, but surely any girl in her position would be desperately willing to risk a minor injury compared to what else may lie ahead. But, no, she just ambles about struggling against her bonds. Then finally aims for the front door. Which is locked.

Celeste is a really cute girl, makes for a delectable heroine. Nothing to complain about.

Sure was fun seeing the original cast again. For the life of me I cannot understand how the original stellar group got dropped. One moment they had been fledgling stars on the way up, then, just nothing. I'm not partial to Molly RIngwald, I never missed her, but these other three, they were totally deserving of their (apparent) careers.

So, okay, there you have it. After a particularly bad start to this season, even The Raven lightens up, and awards a soft-hearted 8. I zapped that first with a broadside of lower than low scores because of, ahem, two performers irritating me, I won't mention names (but initials CL and KF cannot be resisted) and that kick-off episode with 'the supposed Winnebago' was pa-pa-pa-pathetic! But what with Stacey Q and here, the reunion, my purchase of the DVD Is vindicated.