Oh my god!! I rented this movie cause I loved another one of Uwe Boll's movies, BloodRayne. Since it's rating was also low, I thought that people were voting 1 or 2 because they hate the director, not cause the movie is bad. But I guess BloodRayne is the exception cause this movie is very, very bad. And I don't mean bad as in "it's so bad, that it's actually good". I mean it's just bad, nothing good about it.
Let's start from the beginning, who in the world would pay a thousand bucks to attend some party on an island? I know Simon's character was dumb, but that's too much. Then the fisherman told them that they call it Isle del Muertos. I'm no expert in Spanish but I'm pretty sure that means Island of the Dead, but the movie is called House of the Dead, right? When they arrive on the island, they see that everything was upside down. Do they leave? No. Like a bunch of idiots, they stay there for no reason whatsoever. Then, three of these kids go looking for the party while two of them stay at the party site. These three find a house with another three people there. Then they go look for their other two friends. After a couple of deaths, some unnecessary conversations and the discovery that zombies spit out acid, they find the fisherman. Co-incidentally, he has a box full of guns. The stupid kids take them and head back for the house. All of a sudden, they become professionals with these weapons. No one misses any shots and their fighting ability was awesome considering that they were boozed teenagers looking for a party. That scene takes forever and becomes one of the most boring parts of the movie.
The house looked like a single, small room from the outside, but weirdly, when they went in, it was actually a palace with lots of rooms and a lot of floors in it. Over there they found a lab. In it, there was a box of zombie blood. When the blood touched the zombies, they woke up immediately. If that's not stupid, I don't know what is. After that, they went underground and there they found the mastermind that created the zombies, who, although being a zombie like the others, could talk and acted like a normal human (you'll never get to know how in the world he managed to create zombies though).
They manage to kill him. It was the dumbest death in all the movie. I mean, how can you crush someones skull by simply stepping on it? When he dies, no zombies were to be seen, even though, before, there was a huge amount of them, roaming the island. The movie ends there. Zombies were magically gone just because their creator died and then, the rescue team comes and saves the remaining kids.
That's the story. It's kind of a Wrong Turn/Resident Evil plot but about 50 times worse than them. To make it even worse, there is some footage from the game every 5 minutes or so. Pretty darn stupid, isn't it?
Just, stay away from this movie. If you rent it, you'll find yourself in the position like these teens were in; you'll wish you can get out alive (or at the very least, awake)