BOB-629

Here goes your average girl uses her sexual wiles to get what she wants from men story. In this instance, one of the girls is the daughter of a senator. One of her father's friends mistakes her for a call girl and gives her a car to make her forget the incident. She and her friends realize that getting these men on tape with them could be financially beneficial, aka cars, jewelry.

Enter the sleaze ball lobbyist who finds out the girls are making movies and decides to use them for his own benefit and blackmails them with their own tapes. Things really go wrong when one of the girls(Libby George) disappears and the other ones become more entangled in the danger they have created. Daneen Boone gives a decent performance as well as Tracy Tutor, the senator's daughter, but if you're watching this movie for a story line, there are better ones out there.

If you want to see attractive women, this movie has them, a somewhat original angle on the extortion racket, and a few decent performances by girls who really didn't need to do anything more than show up and get naked. Another decent performance by Kevin West who played the lobbyist, he really makes you believe he's a d**k head. A few surprises along the way and you have the standard ending, no surprises there.

Some over the top special effects make you wonder who was getting the money, the ladies or the tech people! Go ahead, rent it, your dark side will thank you!



6.99 out of 10

Treat Williams plays a police officer who has lost part of his memory, yet keeps having flashbacks about a serial killer who binds and rapes his victims. Why does he do that , you ask? Ask one of his fellow police officer played by Tim Busfield who swears Williams knows more about the murders than he lets on. Any how, he enlists the aid of the good doctor(margaret Colin) to help him figure out why he has these flashbacks and how to stop the killer. Of course, they become romantically linked, and that puts her in danger, which he rescues her from, so why is there still time left in the movie?

Good performances all around, especially by Williams who keeps you guessing who the killer is with his charm and a heated performance by Busfield who would have criminals dragged into the streets and shot. Colin plays the part of concerned doctor, potential victim and caring lover all the while ignoring strange inconsistencies in facts.

If you get the chance, watch the movie, and tell me who the killer is, my d**ned VCR cut off before the show was over. I think I know, but I must be sure, was it really that obvious? I need closure!!!! 7 out of 10

There are many reasons not to see this film. And yet, they are the same reasons to see this film, simply to see some of the ingenuity Hollywood can scrounge up when one of their stars dies in the middle of production.

This is not one of the better Bruce Lee films. The absence of Lee throughout most of the movie is too distracting, but the fight sequences toward the end are vintage Lee. One of the more impressive fights is with Lee's student, Kareem Abdul-Jabaar. To see Lee, a small man fight and beat Kareem is truly unique. On a more equal note, Lee gets to fight with Chuck Norris, also a student of Lee's teachings and the present day karate guru.

The story is simple. There are men extorting money from young performers through their contracts. Lee refuses to sign, as well as his singing star girl fiend, whom they kidnap to lure him to a fight. In the end, Lee gives the bad guys their just desserts, and rescues the girl.

But the best reason to see this movie is some of the techniques they used to disguise Lee's absence from the movie. In the first couple of minutes, they paste a still photo of Lee's face over the other guys shoulders. It is obvious, but they were desperate. Later, they keep making him wear sunglasses to hide his face and his identity. After that, it is a motorcycle helmet. Eventually, they work it into the script when he is shot in the face. The doctors say he will look different, so that explains that section of the movie, yet he still wears the sunglasses inside, where it is dark, wher it is light, everywhere! The actual footage of Lee is toward the end of the movie where his simultaneous fights with Kareem and the others take place. So what happened to his face lift?

If you want to see this movie for Bruce Lee, fast forward to all but the last 15 minutes, although you should pause and watch Lee and Norris spar in the early part of the movie, then hit the forward button. The footage shot for the film appears to be here for the most part. Other appearances by Lee are stock footage or scenes from other movies spliced in to lend integrity to the story.

If you want to see some creativity, watch the whole movie, get a kick out of the first hour, and watch Lee give out the kicks in the finale. He is still the best!

First half 4 out of 10 Second half 8 out of 10

Say Tobe Hooper and people start to get paranoid, waiting for that chain saw buzz, but Eaten Alive was not one of his better attempts.

The story centers around a motel in the bayou run by Neville Brand. In the lagoon lives a huge crocodile which disposes of the bodies, living and dead, Brand puts up for the night. The house had a faint TCM look to it, but Brand, although convincing, wasn't the homicidal maniac I wanted to see. Brand even chased one of the local sluts through the woods in her panties with his scythe, and although reminiscent, it wasn't the same. I guess I kept thinking of him carrying that scythe and getting hooked on every low hanging branch there was and laughing. He spent most of his time mumbling and sitting in his little room or listening to some God awful country music and switching lights on and off.

Even when he grabs a scythe and begins to go after people, the fear and anxiety level isn't the same. After the crocodile begins to take a toll on the local populace, dogs, prostitutes,and travelers, the movie really depends on Brand to carry it, but he only mumbles some more and talks to Marilyn Burns whom he has bound to a bed. He even does some bird calls for her; and they say hospitality ain't what it used to be.

Still, Burns did do a good job as a hysterical prisoner/mother, although the better part of her time she spends immobilized on the bed, but simply because you can't talk or move doesn't mean you can't act. But in the end, it just wasn't a Tobe Hooper classic, a cult film maybe, but not a classic.

6 out of 10

Throw in a morally confused, financially troubled betrothed mormon, a porn star with Ph.D's and a knack for creating inventions, a sleazy porn movie maker with his fingers in everything, and a lighting guy with no clue as to what is going on on or off the set and you wind up with Orgazmo. Orgazmo tells the story of our mormon hero, Joe Young, and his quest to become a good mormon while paying for the worldly things his fiance' desires all the while keeping to his beliefs. Written by Trey Parker of South Park fame, the jokes and situations are similar to that show, but now they are applied to everything from the mormon faith to the porn industry.

There is no scintillating, sophisticated humor here, but there is a lot of well placed visual dick jokes and instances where things are taken too literally or where nothing is held back. Childish behavior runs rampant. Door to door testimony may never be the same. Cameo appearances by Ron Jeremey and other porn queens give it porn movie credit, but there was little nudity, the jokes and situations were the real focus.

If you like the old Batman television series, awkward sex jokes and great quotes by memorable figures, you should see Orgazmo and decide for yourself. And after the credits have rolled, Dave the light guy's quotes will stay with you.." I don't wanna sound like a queer or nothing, but I think De Peche Mode is a really sweet band.

8 1/4 out of 10

Here's the scenario.( If at all interested in seeing this movie and forming your own opinions, read this after you've seen it. I'm going to tell you what happens.)

You're a nanomachine engineer named Buck(Thomas) and your girlfriend is a doctor named Anjeline(Amick). You're in love and well to do, so life is peachy, right? Unfortunately, someone knocks you out one night, steals your kidney and replaces it with a ball of acid. Then, you are given tasks to perform to keep the ball from eating your insides away. The boxes promised to hold the antidote are well wrapped but are also empty. Then, someone kidnaps Anjeline, and you wonder how it could get any worse.

Finally, (cough,cough, cough) you figure out that it would take great nanomachine knowledge to build a bomb inside you, so you decide to check up on your irate engineering partner with the horrid cough. Are you surprised to find the kidney kidnapper also has your girlfriend and that he has been completing the bomb inside you by lacing those empty packages with nanomachines?

So, you ineptly botch the rescue attempt and he pulls a gun on the both of you. Now, you have to give him a ride to the laboratory where he wants to blow up you and said laboratory.

But, never fear, in the last five minutes, the police show up and botch their own rescue attempt and kill your irate friend, and a snoopy blackmailing news woman in the cross fire.

It's OK now, right! No, you've still got the bomb in you, the watch your crazed coworker was holding says you've got 30 seconds until you're a wall pizza, and he was the only one who knew how to diffuse it, now what to do. Anjeline to the rescue. She grabs a scalpel, cuts you open, jerks out the bomb and helps you run out the laboratory before it explodes and you don't even bleed to death.

It was more unbelievable to watch than it was to read. The culprit can only be someone with great nanomachine experience, and that leaves out everyone but your disgruntled coworker who asked you before this whole thing started to delay the human testing, but your boss said to go ahead to please the investors. Then, your girlfriend learns while she is strung up like a side of beef by this guy that he has a serious grievance against GM and large companies who put money ahead of humanity. And you have the gall to act surprised!!

There wasn't much that worked in this movie. The chemistry between Thomas and Amick seemed strained at best. Amick walked around half naked the better part of the movie but couldn't even bring herself to do a few T&A shots. Apparently, she didn't feel like getting completely into the role, so you get a half a** acting job. Thomas fared no better, he isn't used to being the lead actor, he usually saves that for some synthetic rubber creation with fingers like sausage or for actresses named Barrymore. At times, he gets these looks like he doesn't know what he is doing, and it doesn't help that he gets these looks during the sex scenes with Amick.

The most unbelievable thing is how long it took Buck to figure out what was going on, and this guy is a nanomachine engineer. I thought that was up near brain surgeon I.Q. And then there were the quickie surgeries; kidnap, cut open, remove kidney, replace with bomb, sew back up, lay on hood of very cool car; overnight!?!@ This guy is good but Anjeline is even better; throw on table, grab scalpel, filet you like a fish and jerk out bomb without regard for the consequences; 30 seconds!! It has to be a world record.

At the end where you see the building blow up, you think they have died in the explosion which would have been the biggest surprise of the movie. It might have saved it. Then, you go back inside and see Anjeline and Buck get out in another shot. So, the director was trying.

And what were they trying to do, throw some suspicion on the news woman. It didn't work, she didn't have the credentials, no matter how well she played the part, and she was the best actor by far. And, perhaps the best part of the movie, Buck's car.

All I have to say to the writer, wouldn't it have been easier to kidnap the girl from the very beginning, it's not new but it is believable. 5 out of 10

I remember when I was a boy, I could walk down to the foot of the road late at night, look up on the hill and see the giant drive in screen glowing with Cheri Caffaro's figure in another predicament. I never heard the dialogue, but who needs it in this movie series. Ginger's power was her sex appeal, and even though she might have been bound and gagged, her captors were the ones who were truly helpless against it. This movie would never be shown on any broadcast channels, not even USA, and that's too bad, it's a gem in the rough.

The acting was usually wooden and inconsistent, some of the editing was less than perfect, the sound has that studio resonance, the outfits were truly 70's, the music was eerily close to disco and the story line was old when the Romans dwelled the earth, but it's good B-movie fun.

The girls are pretty in their 70's way sporting the sexually open styles and high, high heel shoes. It is true to it's period in that respect.

I can just picture the screen lighting up with Ginger seducing one of her gullible captors to release her as she slowly sways against her bonds. Movies like this are best left to those of us who like our B-movie cinema.

Sure, in the era of political correctness and equality, it would get it's share of disdaining looks, but when you look back at the movie, especially some of the dancing scenes, you just have to laugh.and realize that even the Romans, the most civilized society, warranted a little debauchery in their own society, and that there was no harm, no foul on the big screen on a warm summer night.

This movie was awful. I'm sad to see something Tobe Hooper instituted as a cult classic has turned into a pile of s***. There were some decent acting performances, Zellweger in particular, but for the most part the movie had nothing else, no continuity, no fear, and no adherence to the first movie except for the location, the chainsaw, the meat hook and the freezer.

The worst part was the acting of Leatherface. The first Massacre, Leatherface was INTIMIDATING. He could scare without the chainsaw and he growled, moaned and roared, not squeaked like a little p****. The rest of the story was.... what am I saying there was no story. There was some semblance of a story. Here, it's just using the name to get people into theaters and parting fools and their money. I got no explanation for the remote control leg, where the H*** did that come from? If I had to choose between having painful dental work being done or seeing this movie again, I would opt for the root canal. Please, unless you really have a desire to see this movie, fight it and watch something else. 1 1/2 out of 10

Pay television has the best late night films an insomniac could want. Prison Heat has all the elements of the other _ _ _ _ _ heat films; you have a little T and A, a shower scene, an imposing lesbian who rules the cell block, a trip to solitary confinement, a male/female warden who desires one or all of the new chicks, and a rape scene, usually by one of the aforementioned parties.

This one was surprisingly amusing. The acting was ... dare I say it, decent, on some level. If you've seen one of these babes behind bars movies, however, you've seen them all, and the only true change in store is a different set of bodies.

I found a little of their situations a bit too unbelievable, especially some of the things Colleen had learned at her vet, had seen at her.....you get the idea. This one actually tried to stick with the story line more than others. I said story line, not plot, the movie isn't that deep. The T and A was minimal, and I didn't really miss it. As far as this genre goes, this is one of the better movies, but it's no Citizen Kane and still not as enjoyable as Reform School Girls. 5 out of 10

This movie was.... confusing. Everyone here is a step away from being a serial killer, and the movie itself is confused as to where it is going. Is it a low budget sexploitation film or a really twisted murder film. Despite the above average acting, the plot was too confusing to care about after the film reached the halfway point. It was like the director kept trying to bring you to the climax of the film with the discovery of each person's darkest secret and you just get strung out and p****d when they keep putting you off. It might appeal to other people who could follow all the details, but the movie was just too busy for me to enjoy it. I'm the guy who still likes Scooby Doo. 5.5 out of 10