Slow Burn

As soon as I picked this one of off the shelf warnings were going off in my head ("Bad movie alert! Danger! Danger!). Call me ridiculously optimistic, or just plain dumb, but I still rented it just the same. Seventies blaxploitation icon Pam Grier ('Coffy', 'The Big Doll House', 'Jackie Brown',etc.) is a favourite of mine, as is Rutger Hauer ('Blade Runner', 'Flesh & Blood', 'Salute Of The Jugger'), and the prospect of seeing them act together was just too much for me to ignore. The packaging made this look like another tired serial killer "thriller", the kind that should star Michael Madsen or Eric Roberts or James Russo or Chris Penn and go straight to video. But it is in fact even less interesting than that. The movie quickly degenerates into a lame conspiracy mystery, and smells very much like a failed TV pilot. Grier plays a one dimensional sassy cop, Hauer a very dull Doctor who is initially her leading suspect. The chemistry between the two is zilch, and my goodwill towards both performers is still not enough to forgive this absolutely awful waste of time. I'm straining myself trying to think of anything it all about it to recommend viewing it, but coming up with a big fat zero. Avoid this one at all costs.