Small-scale character study, with enough screenplay wisdom to pull me in and make me feel like I’m really discovering something new about human nature. We take a look at a marriage between Beth (Julia Louis-Dreyfus), an essayist and author of family dysfunction whose insecurity is that she has never sold enough books, and Don (Tobias Menzies), an individual and couples shrink who is losing the trust of his patients lately because—get this—he’s too nice of a guy, too neutral, doesn’t gut-punch his patients often enough. This is a couple that still revels in dating, in taking each other out to restaurants or to the park or to the bookstore or to shop. They have long been cozy with each other. Individually, they have some murmuring frustrations (they are annoyed at each other’s ineffectuality with gift-giving). Mostly we get sense of frustration from Beth, who teaches a college writing class and also participates in volunteer homeless work, which she does I think to fill a void in her life. Don, on the other hand, bottles up his frustrations and doesn’t release them.

One day, in a chance occurrence, Beth and her sister just happen to find Don at a store where he’s picking out socks. She’s about to go tap on his shoulder, or what have you, when she overhears that Don is confessing he doesn’t like his wife’s new book. It’s punchless. It’s phony. It’s a book that’s not going to have an easy time reaching the sales market. This is in contrast to what Don has been telling Beth at home—the book is good, needs new redrafts, it’s incredible and honest and unique, it will find a buyer eventually at the right publishing house. Bottom line, though, Don has been telling Beth that he likes the book when he does not.

This crushes Beth because almost her entire identity, and self-worth, comes down to the fact that she needs to feel like an important author.

You Hurt My Feelings is a comedy about fake supportiveness in relationships, about how ubiquitous positivity isn’t constructive on improving oneself unless there’s some valid critiquing thrown in their too, i.e., honesty.

When Don starts getting more honest with his patients at his sessions, he improves as a therapist. When Don starts getting more honest with his wife about, gee, every issue, well that opens up new doors of good communication.

The writer/director is Nicole Holofcener, whom over twenty-five years, has never made a fantastic mind-blowing film, but has never made a bad one, either. Perfect batting average. They are all watchable and valuable to a degree. Whatever’s out there by her, watch it. You can start with You Hurt My Feelings.