Elisasue can get it tho. Two for one of the most beautiful women in Hollywood, can’t complain.

✓ Best substance-abuse prevention campaign I’ve ever seen. 
✓ Best acting performance by Moore since her role in The Hunchback of Notre Dame. 
✓ Best body horror that feels completely original and not just an amalgamation of previous iconic works within the sub-genre. 
✓ Best use of makeup and practical effects since Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. 
✓ Best supporting performances by Qualley (although she pretty much a co-lead with Demi) and Quaid. 
✓ Best production design—white tile bathrooms are so scary.
✓ Best cinematography—fisheye lenses, odd angles, and vibrant color palettes make me uncomfortable.
✓ Best sound design—I always wondered how a tit squeezing out of a fleshy hole would sound like. Well, I finally know how.
✓ Best original screenplay—I mean, it starts with the shot of an egg pooping out another yolk.
✓ Best directing—Fargeat delivers the most brutal cautionary tale about conforming to patriarchal beauty standards. Her insane vision is why the film works. She had to storyboard every single scene and shot in this cause everything feels precisely calculated: from the way the message is overly emphasized, to the way the grotesque is presented.
✓ Best picture—It’s not the best of the year. But it’s up there. I don’t need to explain. Just look at this checklist.

The Academy is gonna snub this near masterpiece big time next year because they are a bunch of losers that need to watch horror movies with the lights on, otherwise they pee themselves. I still hope I’m wrong about this, but I must prepare myself mentally for what seems to be an imminent and unfortunate situation. 

Side note: 2024 has been the year of practical effects in the current digital age, and I’m living for it! Also, seeing the MUBI logo play out on the big screen for the first time made my heart flutter. I just hope my subscription doesn’t go up now that they are famous.